"First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage": Living Together, the Step Before Marriage

"First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage": Living Together, the Step Before Marriage

Length: 954 words (2.7 double-spaced pages)

Rating: Better Essays

Open Document

Essay Preview

One of the things I remember from childhood is the innocent, if not irritating, repetition of four-line songs on the playground. One lyric in particular seems to have embedded itself in my memory and lasted through the years: “First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in a baby carriage.” I am sure most of my fellow college students remember it well.

Now that I am in my third year of college and in love, I find myself trying to shirk the marriage step by thinking of something that could be put in the middle of love and marriage. I am not alone. Many of my friends think about moving in with their boyfriends or girlfriends in order to fill the gap, and just as many others are actually taking the plunge.

While moving in with your significant other may seem like the perfect solution to help stall the big walk down the aisle, it isn’t. In fact, it will eventually have the opposite effect on your relationship, and more than likely you’ll end up old, alone and unhappy. Your beauty will have faded, and the fellow singles in your now middle-aged category will be seeking younger, more nimble models. You’ll wish you could have done something to save your marriage.

Marriage is something that most of us will inevitably come to face within the next five to 10 years. I have always loved the idea of my hypothetical husband carrying me up the steps of our first home together after a big, beautiful, white wedding. Yet, if we moved in together before getting hitched, that dream would no longer be able to become reality.

I do believe that couples who move in together before marriage can find ways to make it work, but the odds are against them. I was raised in the nuclear insulation of a Christian home. I have since come t...


... middle of paper ...


...s over. There are, however, some things that can spur a couple out of the sluggish rut they may be experiencing.

It is important to revive the little things that bring butterflies. Let your live-in boyfriend or girlfriend have a night out with his or her friends. Play games with one another, go to an exciting event or visit a neighboring town and go window-shopping after eating brunch. When extremely committed couples participate in new activities together, it can bring out those same feelings that were experienced long ago.

Taking things slowly is not a bad thing. There does not need to be an in-between step between the love and marriage phases. Moving in with your partner is not the answer; by no means is that taking things slow. It is just a way to mimic a marriage with no license or vows. First comes love, then comes marriage. Perhaps the children know best.

Need Writing Help?

Get feedback on grammar, clarity, concision and logic instantly.

Check your paper »

Essay on Arranged Marriage Vs. Love Marriage

- Arranged Marriage vs. Love Marriage Each marriage comes with a different perspective and story, whether it is an arranged marriage or love marriage. Arranged and Love marriages are very similar yet different. Love is the pure feeling of attachment. Arrange marriage is like a blind date in hopes to find love. It could be love at first sight or love after a while so in somewhat way they end up being a love marriage after all because the end result is the same as they get married or find love. In this essay there will be comparison done on love marriage and arrange marriage....   [tags: Marriage, Arranged marriage, Wedding]

Better Essays
1279 words (3.7 pages)

Why Cohabitation Before Marriage Is Beneficial Essay

- I. Have you ever discovered something so erroneous about the person you chose to date and you felt you needed to breakup immediately. Seems simple enough. Now imagine if you were married and discovered this crudeness. II. I’ve been proposed to more than once, and I’ve been married twice. I did not live with my first partner before marriage. I could perhaps have married only once if I lived with my partner first. III. There are three reasons that cohabitation before marriage is beneficial; it allows couples to learn one another and as a team forms an identity, decide if marriage is for you, and lowers the divorce rate....   [tags: Marriage, Cohabitation, Common-law marriage]

Better Essays
1174 words (3.4 pages)

Marriage Is About Love Not Gender Essay

- Asia Clinton Mr. Karp Senior composition January 9, 2015 Marriage is about love not gender. Being in love is when two people whether a man and women or even a man and man or a women and women care about each other enough to be in a relationship or even get to the point where they want to marry. No one should care whether or not someone else is marrying the same sex because it is not their life that they are living in....   [tags: Same-sex marriage, Marriage, Homosexuality]

Better Essays
1148 words (3.3 pages)

Essay about Love vs. Arranged Marriage

- Marriage has been described as one of the oldest and most enduring human institutions however the reasons for marrying have varied extensively from period to period and culture to culture. In many cases marrying was predominantly an economic decision which determined the suitor that the family could find for the daughter. In some cultures a man's wealth was based on the size of his harem or the number of spouses that he maintained while in other cultures a young woman's family was expected to give a substantial dowry to her suitor....   [tags: Marriage, Culture, Human Institutions]

Better Essays
1698 words (4.9 pages)

Marriage And Divorce Are All Things That Have Affected Marriage Essay

- Marriage and divorce have changed a lot over the years for many reasons. Education, financial security, child marriage, arranged vs. love marriage, are all things that have affected marriage. Marriage rates have decreased over the years around the world due to these different factors. For many people education is highly valued and they have concerns that starting a family will get in the way of it. People also feel the need to be financially secure before started their own family. They want to be sure that they can support themselves before bringing someone else into their life to care for....   [tags: Marriage, Arranged marriage, Child marriage, Love]

Better Essays
2001 words (5.7 pages)

Marriage Is A Lifelong Commitment Essay

- Marriage is a lifelong commitment that people make when they are ready for the “next step” in their relationships. To me, marriage is a partnership between two people who have decided that they are accepting of each other’s real selves and not simply the idea of one another. In my culture, marriage is an accomplishment. My parents never married each other and so I feel as though once I’ve married and had children within my marriage, I’ll have done something my parents could be proud of me for. The idea of marriage is exciting for me....   [tags: Marriage, Courtship, Love, Philosophy of love]

Better Essays
932 words (2.7 pages)

Essay on Relationship Between Marriage And Marriage

- Growing up, marriage had never been something that was a topic of conversation until the middle school stage. Around that age is the time where boys and girls start experimenting with dating. The phrase “I love you” would slip out a little too early in the relationship, and the “let’s get married” thought would come in right after that. Then there were people like me who would hear those words fall from a boy’s mouth, and then we would roll our eyes. Not every girl seeks a relationship, because some of us do not see the point in having a man do things that we are capable of doing ourselves....   [tags: Marriage, Wedding, Divorce, Alimony]

Better Essays
731 words (2.1 pages)

Marriage Between Men And Wives Essay example

- In ancient Rome society, marriage is one of the most significant parts of everyone’s life, especially for women. In general, the Romans praise the harmonious marriage relationship. They also have distinct and specific expectations about husbands’ and wives’ obligations. The Romans usually honor these responsible wives and set them as outstanding examples of pietas. Turia, for instance, is an excellent model who manifests wives’ good behaviors and their loyalty to husbands. The inscription, written by Turia’s husband, indicates different components for ideal marriages, such as women’s good personalities and duties, husbands’ love to wives, and family financial management....   [tags: Marriage, Husband, Wife, Love]

Better Essays
1181 words (3.4 pages)

Marriage Is Not Always The Path Taken By Everyone Essay

- Marriage is the union of two people as husband and wife under the court of law. People have been getting married for centuries and for several different reasons. They are not always perfect, and sometimes lead to divorce. However, society revolves around marriage to produce future generations and provide an optimum environment for both the parents and the children. The ironic thing about marriage is that the relationship really isn’t the thing that changes. The main difference is how other people interact with the couple, and how legal obligations are handled....   [tags: Marriage, Love, Wife, Arranged marriage]

Better Essays
1188 words (3.4 pages)

Essay on Marriage and Security

- Marriage and Security Nowadays, when people think about marriage, they usually think of two people, deeply in love, who decide to bind their lives to live together. Unfortunately, that is not always the truth. There are many reasons other than love that cause marriage. Marriage has different meanings for everyone, depending on the era, the economic situation, and the culture in which they lived. But no matter what these different reasons are, the main idea has always been the same. People get married for the sake of security....   [tags: Marriage Love Security Essays]

Better Essays
1858 words (5.3 pages)