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The new gender gap
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Dark strands of hair flailed about my head as I spun around, arms snaking its way through the sheets for its targets. The space besides me was cold. He was on call at the hospital, after all, it shouldn’t have come as a surprise he might be gone. As I so often did. A deft finger swiped across the iPhone to check the time, as well as looking for assurance. Sis’s flight cancelled, asked for Matty. Gone to drop him back. Love you. Well, I wasn’t going to complain about having hours of extra sleep without having to listen to my potential nephew cry his way through the night. It was all very new, living with a man permanently. Integrating into something remotely resembling a family. The red sun was still making its way from its slumber, the sky streaked with violent shades of orange and purple. A silly flagpole soared from the opposite house of patriots, reaching high, as if a dagger releasing blood from the heavens. Blood drenching the rustling bushes, my beloved Maserati, and…the person standing outside my window. I blinked. Squinted. Sure enough, a figure stood his nose pressed against the window, breath fogging up the window to conceal their face. For a fraction of a second, I considered darting into the office for safety. But surely such action could only rouse suspicion. The light flicked on, and my neighbour obediently replied with a casual swipe of the window. Tall, not dark and handsome, I’d seen him strolling around a few times, but never spoken. He’s accompanied by a casual smirk and wickedly roaming eyes. I wrapped a dressing gown tightly as I opened the latch on the window, inhaling the fresh mint scent wafting through. “I think you may have left your radio on upstairs.” The blond scratched his nose absentmindedly. “I d... ... middle of paper ... ...a matter of seconds. With no source of spurting, and yet the body warm, only one question blared furiously in my mind. How long had it been? I didn’t know the man. Whether he was friend or foe. That was of little consequence if the cycle had once again begun. A flash of metal protruded from the ribs. The blade still afresh. My arms shook as they struggled to wrench the knife, squelching noises sickened my ears as it was successful unsheathed. The ghosts of the vendettas trailed round in my racing mind. My fingers tremored as they turned over the handle, inspecting the unmistakable familiar etchings. Adrenaline was slowly ebbing away. I felt as if drowning, in the sea of dread. The phone vibrated in the man’s trouser pocket. I paused the Vivaldi soundtrack, despite not needing to read the message to know what it would say. With regards, M. And the lights went out.
Ghosts, as the psychological projections of history and our own minds, haunt us everyday. In The Shining, director Stanley Kubrick’s latent obsession with Holocaust imagery combines with the violent history of the United States to haunt a small family. The movie is framed in different segments, a black scene interrupting the story by marking off time. It starts by counting through months (“September”) to hours (“Two Hours”), thus disrupting and distorting the passage of time for the viewer (“Remembrance of Things Forgotten” 208-209).
Before I could even think of what to do, she was right up at my window, wide-eyed. She gestured to open the door. There was no way I was doing that. She still had that aggressive tone in her facial expression. She couldn’t be trusted. She was crazy. I put my window down a little bit so I could see what she had to say. I was hoping it was an apology for rude she was to me.
I heard a blood-curdling scream and I jumped. I felt silent tears running down my heavily scarred face, but they weren’t out of sadness. Mostly. They were a mixture of pain and fear. I ran into the eerie, blood-splattered room and screamed as I felt cold fingers grab my neck.
The cold gleaming edge of the blade, a thin razor. It once was a replacement blade for a shaver, now it is the tool of my own death, a tiny piece of demise. The sharpened edge and cool steel a sharp reminder of what I held. My palm faced upward, a thin morbidly dotted line dashed across my wrist, the blue veins and worn crease lines hidden below the thick permanent black marker. The steel, now warmed from my hesitant and fearful touch pressed a single corner against my flesh, the natural flexibility of my flesh giving in slightly against the unwavering corner, but the natural elasticity pushed back against the steel as well. The edge was so perfectly sharp that as the flesh pushed against it, the flesh spread apart allowing the warm metal to lick its first drops of blood. The corner slowly pushed across the dotted line, splitting the black mark in half on either side of the wrist, for the first moments there wasn't a sense of pain but then as the steel slowly moved the ache started to flow with the blood and a tingle of pain set in. Vibrant trickles of crimson started to flow down my wrist,a rush of life that soon would touch the elbow. The trickle grew, the razor halfway across the wrist. It was almost pleasurable, almost enjoyable, but it wasn't. Now the distress was growing, a pain of panic and fear more than physical discomfort. A gnawing sensation of unrest and worry arousing that primal instinct of self preservation. A thick harsh swallow, my throat felt so dry, so thick. A simple swallow turning into a war. Muscles tensing up in my shoulders, my teeth gritting and grinding as I tried to steady and control my tattered breath and shaking hands. Sweat droplets formed on my palms and numbness called attention to my hands.
• If there is a lull in our conversation, my partner will check his or her cell
Tim moved past the bellman at the doorway, only to observe Bryan using his iPhone to capture the moment.
Hands reached out to snatch an appealing, ripe orange out of the ceramic bowl on the counter. I watched, alarmed, as I unwillingly stared as my brethren were deftly peeled. It seemed the pain wouldn't be plausible until I myself felt it, experienced the unfamiliar, less-than-pleasant sensation, nor did the thing show any signs of putting an end to its assault. I heard the cries and screams of my kind, begging for mercy from the being as they were peeled and thrown into a dark crevice on the thing’s face. I had a sense of terrible trepidation as I was picked up. The nails of the strange creature dug into my skin, peeling off the layer and pulling me apart. The pain could only be described as excruciating. That was it. Excruciating. I attempted to cry out to no avail.
Turkle presents the issue cell phones create for individuals in regards to their ability to appreciate the present. The fear of missing out creates an anxiety for individuals; the anxiety prevents the individuals from receiving enjoyment from the moment they are currently experiencing. The stress from the anxiety causes a mental strain on individuals as cell phones inevitably hinder peoples’ ability to not only connect with the people around them but the moment they are in. Thus, a person’s mental peace is dependent upon the cell phone’s ability to provide them with a sense of finding the ‘best’ experience.
Without giving the street wanderer a second thought, I pulled up to the curb in front of our apartment and turned off the ignition. As we were gathering together our books, I began to wonder exactly what he was trying to say to us. Was it important enough for him to come ask again? I decided this to be a possibility and checked in the passenger side mirror before I opened my door. I leaned over and my heart skipped a beat when I saw the reflection of two dirty tennis shoes approaching along the sidewalk. “Whoa, whoa,” I told my roommate, “Let’s hang out in here for a few minutes.” He was upon us as soon as the words left my lips. Standing in front of the car, his arms were up over his head as if he were a referee confirming a field goal in a football game. He stood there for a moment like a deer in front of the headlights still shining brightly from my car. Then he walked over to my side of the vehicle. The windowpane began to fog as he spoke to me only inches away from the glass.
Taking your phone from your hands and looking at the lock screen, where the song still lay paused, he answered his own question.
The telephone is one of the greatest inventions of all time. Without a telephone, life as we know it today, would be much more difficult and time consuming. Some of life’s activities might even be impossible. Talking to loved ones that live far away, changing work schedules, making appointments to have the utilities turned on in our homes, paying the bills, and calling 911 are all actions that can be completed in the blink of an eye, by using a telephone. Ironically, improved communication, the biggest asset to having a phone has been significantly destroyed by the use of the newest technologically advanced cell phones. Furthermore, despite all of the wonderful benefits there are to having a telephone, the transformation and advanced technology of the new and improved “smart” mobile phone has created a world geared toward speed and quantity; while on the other hand promoting haste, less than acceptable customer service, dreadful family relationships, impatience, poor spelling, and memory problems.
Even as I sit here typing this paper, my own shiny, rectangular piece of molded plastic and metal lies inches away from my fingertips, beckoning me to use it. Looking out the window, one of the first sights I see are people walking with one hand up to their ear, evidence this technology is in use. I can count on one hand the number of adults I know who do not own one these mobile devices. People are now able to be virtually accessible almost anywhere at any time.
Pedaling my bike, I swerved left and right, dodging all sorts of trash which littered the desolate ground beneath my feet. The car was gaining ground fast; its ebony visage glaring at me like some hell-spawned demon. A cold clammy hand seemed to envelope my body. I knew I could not escape.
My hand shaking at every thought, a cold shiver ran down my spine as cold sweat trickled down the side of my forehead. I lifted my hand up and a strong smell hit my nose, it was the smell of blood. I lifted the object and shock hit me like lightening, fear displaced my sadness, sickness changed my bloodstream from blood to a thick liquid pus and vomit. I held the muscle with my right hand as my left hand was paralysed with shock. The adrenaline shot me forcing me to move but shock shattered me into thin slices that were impossible to put back again.
My stomach retched, my throat dry, had I got myself into this mess? A distant thud echoed across the cold, hard floor, ricocheting into my ear. Someone was coming.