fight club

I think that everyone, to some sense, is uncomfortable or insecure in surroundings they are unfamiliar with. For me it is hard to be confident in surroundings I am not used to. Having confidence in myself is a huge part of life. Insecure feelings in a foreign place are a very lonely part of life, learning how to overcome these feelings is always beneficial.

Last August I chose to try out for a hockey team in Port Alberny, British Columbia. The challenge I faced before I stepped on the ice was to rise above the nerves I had developed during my long car and ferry ride. The ten hours I spent in the car was horrible. I had all that time to think how the camp could turn out, which made me nervous. There were all the questions in my head. How would I match up against my competition? What if I played badly? What would the coaches think of me? And would I get cut or make the team? My whole hockey career I always worked hard to be the best that I could be. Making this team meant I would have a shot at achieving a college scholarship.

Upon my arrival to the rink I had to do a physical fitness test with the other guys in the camp. As soon as I joined the group of guys, I immediately felt distanced from all of them, since I was a day late to the camp and from the U.S. It was like I was walking around with Bobs bitch tits on my chest from the book Fight Club. Bob was a body builder taking hormones which caused him to grow breasts. He was used to having a fit body. So going from a muscular guy to having “bitch tits” is a huge change in his appearance. This would be hard for any man to accept. I imagine he must have felt as I did, like the spotlight was on him. I am not the kind of person who wants to be the center of attention. The coaches made us take a timed two kilometer run, which was tiring for just about everyone. After the run, we had a little rest, my legs felt like they were going to fall off; they were so stiff from the ten hour car ride and then running two km.