Steve closed his eyes and tried to settle into the rhythm of the machine. It was better to be limp, let the pump do its work. His heart still hammered in his chest, making his blood pound so hard he was having difficulty hearing. something shifted inside him and he felt the cold food push down the tube again and sit un-moving in his stomach. The sensation of being "full" without eating was incredibly wrong. He sneezed as the flow increased and the temperature burned down his sinuses and at the back of his throat, where the pain from his broken tooth throbbed. after half an hour of watching his stomach artificially fill, the process stopped, and Steve sobbed with relief. he tried to wiggle his head to dislodge the tubes again, but he succeeded only in getting a mouthful of drool on his crude pillow. The sensor in his mouth sprayed a little water and Steve swallowed greedily .He held himself motionless as he thought, trying to tell himself this wasn't really happening to him. He wished he was somewhere else, anywhere, and his brain flashed images of his bed, the barrack's cot, Peggy's couch, His and Bucky's shared bed. Oh... Bucky...god Bucky I wish you were here. I wish you could bust through that door and carry me back home. the only place i felt safe was in your arms. I miss you. Every single second of every day. I wake up and think of you, I sleep imagining you holding me close. I'm sorry... Im sorry I couldn't reach you. I swear I tried. I close my eyes and all I see is your face, confused and hurt. Your hand reaching for mine. And I dropped you. I let you fall Bucky. Its my fault. Got you killed. Some part of Steve's mind knew he was sick. A Sedative, or blocker must have been laced in the food. His mind rolled endlessly l... ... middle of paper ... ...he sipped it. The water was cool and sweet, and Steve rinsed his mouth out and spat several times before drowning the water. Steve rolled the candy in his fingers for a moment, and popped it in his mouth just as Bruce had done. His jaw ached at the effort of real food, and even though it was soapy, it was delicious. "Thank you." Said Steve, leaning back against the rock wall. Bruce swam to sit beside Steve and offered him a cloth. "Do you think you can manage on your own?" He asked, being polite enough to keep his eyes locked to Steve's own. Steve nodded, Still weary, but wanting desperately to have some control back. He noticed Bruce respectfully adverted his gaze and had done up his soaking dress shirt. "Ill manage. any soap?" he asked and was handed a dish of white flakes. "It smarts, but it will get you clean." Bruce smiled and looked longingly at the ceiling.