The Need for Understanding the Differences:
An Opinion on Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus
In order to have a good communication, men and women have to understand and trust one another. In a book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus John Gray shows the differences that men and women have. Also, Gray points out plenty of techniques and ideas that men and women can use to make their relationships much stronger and happier. I argue that John Gray's book is very helpful, informative, and insightful because his guidance helped me to understand my girlfriend's temperament and differences. Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus is a useful book to read and look into. The information which is provided in the book can definitely help men and women to develop special skills and knowledge which will help their relationships.
In the first chapter Gray explains that it is as if men and women are from different planets. He states, "Without the awareness that we are supposed to be different, men and women are at odds with each other" (Gray 10). By this quote Gray is saying that not knowing these differences men and women will have conflicts and frustrations in their relationships. Furthermore, most men and women do not know the differences between each other, and they end up fighting and breaking up. John Gray does a great job explaining men's and women's differences in the book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus.
In Chapter Two, Gray explores men's and women's values and their differences. He points out two very important negative factors that men and women often use, "Men mistakenly offer solutions and invalidate feelings while women offer unsolicited advice and direction" (Gray 17, 21). Likewise, most of men ...
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...d me and gave me a hug.
All of those techniques can make a world of difference, especially those that have to do with improving communication. As Dr. John Gray explains, "These differences can come between the sexes and prohibit mutually fulfilling loving relationships" (Gray 263).
After reading the book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, the relationships with my girlfriend have improved dramatically. I learned how to understand, listen, and approach my girlfriend in a better way. This book can help not only me and Valerie with our difficulties, but other men's and women's relationships. I strongly recommend that men and women read this book because it can definitely change the way they think, feel, perceive, react, respond, love, need and appreciate.
Works Cited
Gray, John. Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. New York: HarperCollins, 1992
In Karen Horney's "The Distrust Between the Sexes," she attempts to explain the problems in the relationships between men and women. She writes that to understand the problem you must first understand that problems stem from a common background. A large amount of suspiciousness is due to people's intensity of emotions.
We all have a certain way of communicating that seems evident and natural to us, so we can be shocked, frustrated, or even sadden when someone misinterprets us. Interacting with other people is part of our daily lives, yet men and women have different styles of communication and behavior. Some of the major differences between men and women are how they express emotion, affection or intimacy, and communication. Women tend to be more emotional and express more affection, whereas men are far less emotional and express less affection. Women regard intimacy as talking face-to-face; however, men regard intimacy as working or playing side-by-side. Women tend to ask more questions when communicating while men ask fewer or no questions at all. These
The film “Think like a Man” directed by Tim Story, centres around four best friends whose lives are shaken up when the women they are pursuing buy the book “Act like a Lady, Think like a Man”, written by Steve Harvey, and start taking his advice to heart. When the men find out about the book, they conspire to use its information in order to turn the tables against the women (Rotten Tomatoes , 2012). While watching this film, I noticed that it continuously emphasised gender inequality, in relationships and in an economic sense, as a discourse of human nature. Throughout the film, the viewer is exposed to scenes where, for a woman, stating that you have a successful career and earn six figures is a turn off as opposed to the fact that if it were a man, it would be considered a good thing. Other scenes are of how men and women differ in how they perceive relationships to be. For example, when the main female character believes she is starting a relationship with a man, the man actually sees it as a one night stand. In this essay, it is important to understand that human nature is a set of assumptions about motives, in an emotional and mental capacity, and psychic mechanisms which are considered as universal traits and characteristics possessed by all individuals living in human societies, whether they are civilized or primitive, modern or ancient (Wrong, 1963). In other words, by human nature, I refer to traits and characteristics expressed by individuals which are purely natural to humanity in any given context (Turnbull, 1973). How this became human nature, gender inequality, can be explained through examining how gender differences and stereotyping was formed, through biological phenomenon, as well as external, cultural, factors. ...
If man and the woman both had the same communication ways they would be more successful in marriage. Many of the communication issues are brought up in the article “Sex, Lies, and Conversation by Deborah Tannen.” Tannen states that men and women argue with one another over communication which leads to marital problems and divorce. Men and women have different viewpoints on communication. Women see bad communication as the one of the major reasons for divorce. Also the way men and women communicate are very different. Men are very different than women they do not like to communicate as much like women. Men don’t talk about their problems and women love to talk about them. Communication is seen as one major cause leading to a relationship failure. When couples get married the women is always looking for a good comuincator.
A men biggest weakness is expressing their emotions. They are taught from an early age to be fearless and powerful. They are informed that 'Big Boys Don 't Cry ' and to 'Man Up '. Men start to connect feelings and emotions with their weakness. They come to believe that they have failed if they become affectionate and were to open their hearts. As a result, many men try to be the warrior who saves the people around them and always puts on a bold face. Men are typically the provider of their household and tend to play the male role. “All men are the same”, is the most common phrase we all hear a lot nowadays, but some of us fail to realize that they are not. Carver argues that men are successful in relationship when they are unafraid to express emotion.
Nicholson, J. (1993) Men and Women: how different are they? 2nd Edition. Oxford: Oxford University Press. Page 2.
One of the most important skills for couples to have in a relationship is the ability to communicate in an effective manner. Communication is necessary in order to disclose with a partner and build intimacy. It is also necessary in order to resolve conflict that occurs in the course of the relationship. David Knox and Caroline Schacht, authors of the textbook Choices in Relationships, identify fifteen strategies that are important to the development of effective communication in relationship. These communication principles can be modified and applied to many types of interpersonal relationships, but all fifteen are vital for communication in a healthy relationship with a romantic or life
Woman can not understand the concept that not all men think all the time. They sometimes have boxes that are just empty and they seem as though they are staring off into space and not thinking of anything. Men also have the power to block out all other noise when they are trying to focus on one box, this is what women call selective listening. Not quite this is the cause of men being simple minded and not being able to focus on one this at a time. The men in this book seem to have problems understanding what women need and what they want to have, which is a man to love. This book also brings up stereotypes that characterize men and women. Such as woman are worse drivers, more emotionally in control and better at day-to-day decision making ,while men seem to be more focused on tools, sports, and sex. Which seems to point out the differences of men to
Chapter 9 Gendered Close Relationships is about stereotypes for men and women ideas on how to behave in relationships. The expectations for male and female in a relationships have been set by their gender roles. The meaning of personal relationships is where partners depend on each other for various things from affection to material assistance. Partners are expected affection, companionship and energy. The two main models of personal relationships are male deficit model and alternate paths model. Male deficit model suggests male lack skills in developing relationships with others. In alternate paths model, men and women just have different ways to sustain a relationship. It’s not that men lack skills but men show it in a different way.
Communication between men and women is a constant comparison of differing and many times opposite forms of reasoning. But should these differences hinder our ability to communicate with the opposite sex? There are many differing opinions concerning this topic. While trying to understand our differences we have lost site of the fact that somewhere in our conflicting thought patterns and methods of communication is the challenge and intrigue that attracts us to the opposite sex. Rather than seeing our communication diversities as obstacles we should consider them challenges that draw and keep our attention. You do not need to be an expert on human behavior to appreciate gender classified language and its effects on male female relationships, however many experts have attempted to tackle the issue.
Do men and women effectively communicate in the same way, or is it just a conversation of misunderstanding? There is constantly a new interest in whether men and women converse successfully. Professor and journalist, Deborah Tannen writes, “Sex, Lies, and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” Tannen compares and contrasts all conversational styles, and explains how the expectation of dialogue affects how men and women converse. Tannen focuses on the subject of marriage and the imbalance of interest between male and female couples. The contrasting perspective however comes from, Deborah Cameron, author of, “What Language Barrier”. Cameron conveys that the stereotypes left upon male and female communication
relationship problems between men and women because of the fundamental psychological differences between them. The author represents men and women from two different planets. Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. This book also states the difference of values of men's and
The success of any relationship relies on the ability to communicate well. Communication is important in all relationships as it allows us to share our interests, concerns, and support of each other. It helps us to organize our lives and make decisions; and it allows us to work together. Effective communication is based on the way we talk and listen, how we respond as well as our body language. We can all learn how to improve the way we communicate because it takes more than words to create a safe, exciting and secure relationship. All too often the signals we send are not those we intend to send, and when this happens, both the connection and trust are lost in our relationships.
Most everyone in today’s society is familiar with the book, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. The author, John Gray, has written many books about the differences men and women face during everyday life. The book, Mars and Venus in the Workplace, is the ninth book in his Mars/Venus theme that he began writing in 1993. In this book, Grey informs his audience that men and women communicate with different styles. Grey also acknowledges that there is prejudice against women in the workplace; they have to work twice as hard because it is not a level playing field.
They should also become knowledgeable in the opposite sex language and communication habits. However, even though our communication styles are so different, men and women can learn to adapt these communication styles to work together in harmony. Although we can say and know what to do to compromize and find the way out of misunderstanding each other, anyway man is man, woman is woman and when it comes to solve you own problem with your partner, you don't rememeber all you have studied to improve your relationship with your beloved. the fact that women are emotional will always be like that,i believe it's because we were created that way. Anyway, for instance, i feel some kind of powerand i'm sure many women do too, when men still ask themselves the same stupid question," What do women really want?", a question that bothers men a lot.