What Makes a Successful Marriage

The summer before my freshman year of high school, my mother called me and my two sisters into the living room. We were all confused as to this surprise family meeting. My mom began to speak beginning with the words, “This is one of the most difficult things I’ve ever had to tell you girls...” Now, myself, becoming highly concerned; my mother continued with, “Your father and I are getting a divorce.”

This was some surprising and hard news to take in. I just sat there puzzled, asking myself questions like, “How long was this planned?” or, “What happened between my parents?” These questions were vaguely answered. However, my mother slightly explained that it would be a “friendly” divorce.

Close to four years later now, my parents are both in new and happy relationships, my eldest sister is newly engaged, and my youngest sister and I are also doing just fine. I haven’t ever been too emotional about my parents’ divorce, but it still has affected me however. It has frightened me for my future, and I wonder if I will ever find the right person to marry. For if my parents get a divorce after three children and seventeen years of marriage, what could then be the definition of love? Is there any hope for me having a lifetime of happiness with a spouse? My parent’s divorce has dedicated me though, to be careful in the decision of whom I choose to marry when that time comes. I wanted to do my own research, and figure out how couples make it work for a lifetime. Granted there isn’t one right answer, but I believe there might be certain characteristics that help a marriage stand strong, and I want to believe that people can still be as happy with their spouse forty years down the road, as they were when they first fell in love.

To begin my ...

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...age. It really is a great new adventure, from buying that diamond ring to holding your first child together. Marriage is a hundred percent the work of a team.

I noticed lots of similar patterns in these loving and happy couples, and I believe that is no coincidence. They each share the big things in common, and then let all of their other little differences complement each other. They also all stressed the value of good communication, and making sure to think of the other person before one’s self. I found it interesting as well that one of the biggest characteristics people look for in a spouse, is the quality of a sense of humor.

I found great peace speaking with these people who seem to make it work, admitting that there will always be struggles, but all of the joy that comes with loving someone and having someone love you, is worth working through anything.