Transgender Reflection Paper

780 Words2 Pages

This Friday, a day to honor those transgender men and women who have lost their lives at the hand of hate, is marked by a number of remembrance events across the globe, but what will take place in the heart of every transgender person, is a moment of reflection on how so very easily they could have been included in the shockingly high death toll.
The sad truth is, this personal moment is not exclusive to November 20th. I, like many others, live perpetually is a state of fear of the reaction from those who do not support my identity.
My sheltered Midwestern rearing didn 't lend itself to much exposure to diversity, so when I first began to realize I was different, I really had no idea how very different I actually was. I traveled the all too familiar road of first identifying as bisexual, then gay, then bi again and finally just downright confused. I so badly longed for that accurate all-encompassing label, but it wasn 't until I was in my early twenties that my therapist first asked if I might be transgender. To this I could but only respond, …show more content…

If it wasn 't the reaction to the hormones it was the pain from the surgeries. If not the physical pain it was the emotional repercussion of shutting myself in the house, cutting off from the outside world, taking the time to get everything perfect, all awaiting my big reveal. Because if I wasn 't perfect, then someone might know... someone might realize my truth. I had to be certain I had the perfect voice, was healed to have the perfect face, starved myself so that my muscle mass would eat itself away leaving only the perfect female body. Well, with the passage of a relatively short bit of time, only the minimum of what my body would need to catch up to my mind 's already concrete plan, there I was, exactly what I wanted... a head turning beautiful female that no one would ever know was transgender... or more poignantly, no one would ever have to

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