The Importance Of Sexuality In Society

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We participate in societal norms that divide the world into ways that serve some people’s interest over others (Katz 87), and I find that it is crucial to examine our own lives to realize how we do so. We either support, reject, rebel against, challenge, question, or uphold societal norms through the decisions we make from how we interpret situations to how we interact with others. A large part of how we participate in this system comes from how we have been socialized. According to Howard and Alamilla (2016), socialization tells us that “we learn what behavior is appropriate to our gender, race, class, age, and sexuality from our environment through various learning processes” (p. 166). We uphold how we have been socialized when we refuse …show more content…

At my high school, the heteronormative hook-up culture that heavily promoted masculinity through sexual behavior, resulting in a double standard between women and men. Dude, You’re a Fag cites Renold: “students participate in a ‘heterosexualizing process’ in which children present themselves as ‘normal’ girls or boys through discourses of heterosexuality” (p. 26). As so much of what we do in high school is to impress others, or to at least appear to be in the norm to avoid insults or social exclusion, the majority of my peers (and myself) tried hard to fit in and abide by the norms. Popularity for the guys was very much based on frequency of sexual behavior and “attractiveness” of the girl they had been intimate with. Pascoe points out that “boys and girls engage in interactional rituals to achieve masculine identities, which are, in large part, based in similar homophobic and heterosexualizing processes” (p. 28). This very much describes the ways in which we interacted with one another at my high school. Conversely, the more people women were sexual with, the more social backlash they received. According to Stombler and Baunach (2014), men who are very sexually active are generally not subject to shame and sometimes lauded for sexual behavior, whereas women with “too many” partners are stigmatized (p. 71). While men are socialized to present their masculinity through sexuality, women grow up learning about all the negative consequences of sexuality. Nestle’s My Mother Liked to Fuck highlights the social consequences that come along with being a woman who is open about enjoying having sex (1983). Such consequences include harsh judgement, social exclusion, and even rape. Lorde’s The Uses of the Erotic present that sexualty is something women are taught to hide (2016). I can recall being told I was a “slut” for making out with someone and sleeping on the same couch

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