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The relationship between language and gender
The relationship between language and gender
Impact of gender in communication
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Human communication is very precious. Talking to others around us is essential for a happy life. However, the ways that men and women communicate is very different. There is a huge gap between men and women’s communication. Men and women have always misunderstood each other’s lingo. For example, the way that one would talk around the same sex should be different when talking to the other gender. Women and men should be cautious of the way they communicate with the opposite gender and strive to really understand the other.
First of all, girls are very different in the interests they share which usually causes them to talk more to a girl than a guy. My roommate Christy Hart says, “women like to discuss social events, shopping, the opposite sex, chic flicks and cosmetology.” Carrying on a conversation for woman to woman communication requires a wide range of girly topics. Girls always find a way to talk about their common likes and then they elaborate. For instance if a girl said, “I love that new Nicolas Sparks book,” the other female in the conversation would say, “oh yeah I saw the movie and it was not as good as the book. Can you believe the endings are totally different?” Also, women tend to be very carefree which is very different from men. Females have a way of acting and talking goofy when sharing things as well. This way of speaking is very unique to women. I believe that if women did not talk in this fashion that men would not have as many in depth conversations with women.
Women are very emotional beings. They love to share their hearts with each other. The way that women long to be heard is very different from that of a guy. According to Savanna Warren, “I will tell my boyfriend personal things but not as detailed wi...
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... together more than communication. That is one of the main reasons why it is so vital to fix the talk men and women have with the other gender. The only way to fix this problem is to try to better understand how the opposite sex normally communicates. There is no reason why men and women’s differences cannot unite the genders. I challenge you to be aware of your surroundings and be more considerate about the way you talk to the other sex.
Works Cited
Bulliner, Chase. Personal interview. 3 February 2014.
Hart, Christy. Personal interview. 10 February 2014.
Payne, Aaron. Personal interview. 10 February 2014.
Tannen, Deborah. “Sex, Lies, and Conversation.” Patterns for College Writing: A Rhetorical Reader and Guide. 12th ed. Ed. Laurie G. Kirszner and Stephen R. Mandell. Boston: Bedford, 2012. 127-30. Print
Warren, Savanna. Personal interview. 3 February 2014.
“Men are from Mars, women are from Venus” as the famous saying of John Gray goes. It is believed men and women are nothing alike in almost every aspect. In Deborah Tannen’s essay “Gender in the classroom: Teacher’s Classroom Strategies Should Recognize that Men and Women Use Language Differently” she focused on how men and women differ when it comes to communicating, with emphasis on how it effects to how men and women behave in the classroom.
Deborah Tannen wrote “ Talk in the Intimate Relationship” to help people learn something about how men and women's interactions differ. She is a language scholar and has past experience of failed relationships and she feels as though this was because of lack of communication. Her main focus is on metamessages, these are messages that go beyond what we say. She states that the people that are literal minded, miss out on the context of what communication is. What this essay will consist of being what Tannen calls metamessages, summarizing her article on how men and woman talk, deciding whether Tannen is favorable to both genders and last but not least if I agree to an extent with Tannen says in her article.
Whereas I notice my friends and I openly discuss topics our thoughts in public. Understanding this difference between sexes can help one to communicate better realizing that women are going to talk in private and men will typically show off in
Glenn, Cheryl. “Sex, Lies, and Manuscript: Refiguring Aspasia in the History of Rhetoric.” College Composition and Communication. Vol. 45. 2nd ed. National Council of Teachers of English, 1994. 180-199. Jstor. Web.
Student's Book of College English: Rhetoric, Reader, Research Guide and Handbook. Boston: Pearson Learning Solutions, 2012. 402-405.
Why is it so important to understand the differences between men and women’s communication? Being able to understand and identify the differences between men and women’s communication will help initiate and maintain healthy relationships. For example, men and women have different ideas of what is an “effective” first impression. Women tended to use “appearance enhancing strategies” to attract attention; men rated theses attempts as most effective (Frisbee, Dillow, Gaughan, & Norlund, 2009). However, men also used “appearance enhancing strategies” (Toma & Hancock, 2009) but women rated “using resource enhancing tactics or dominance over the competition” as most effective (Frisbee, Dillow, Gaughan, & Norlund, 2009).
Deborah Tannen is the author of the book You Just Don't Understand where she analyzes the different meanings of communication between men and women. Her research shows that women and men use the same words and phrases and yet can interpret and react to those same words and phrases differently. Tannen compares the two sexes to find men use their conversation as a type of competition or to preserve their independence. For example, men talk about their knowledge regarding sports, cars, women, exc. Meanwhile, women try to foster intimacy through communication. For instance, women often talk and relate on a personal level. Throughout Tannen's book she uses "cross-cultural communication" to describe the differences between the language of men and women. Tannen observed that, "For males, conversation is the way you negotiate your status in the group and keep people from pushing you around; you use talk to preserve your independence. Females, on the other hand, use conversation to negotiate closeness and intimacy; talk is the essence of intimacy, so being best friends means sitting and talking. For boys, activities, doing things together, are central. Just sitting and talking is not an essential part of friendship. They're friends with the boys they do things with" (Tannen 95).
Burciaga, Jose Antonio. “Tortillas.” Patterns for College Writing: A Rhetorical Reader and Guide. 12th ed. Ed. Laurie G. Kirszner and Stephen R. Mandell. Boston: Bedford, 2012. 507-509. Print.
Steven Pinker distinguishes the difference between talking to man and women. Pinker showed a lady that was comfortable talking to another lady and the lady became angry when her talking to a man, not women (Pinker 2007 .p112, 113). People used intricacies method to achieve their needs and emotion instead of saying what they need to say directly. (Pinker 2007 .p113) Furthermore, even in a sexual situation, people twist and turn around and turn around their words. For example, “would you like to come up and see my etching?” (Pinker 2007.p113) Moreover, people use a kind word to order something from someone else without making a demand to the receiver or using indirect speeches to avoid a problem that may happen by mistake. (Pinker, 2007
Do men and women effectively communicate in the same way, or is it just a conversation of misunderstanding? There is constantly a new interest in whether men and women converse successfully. Professor and journalist, Deborah Tannen writes, “Sex, Lies, and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” Tannen compares and contrasts all conversational styles, and explains how the expectation of dialogue affects how men and women converse. Tannen focuses on the subject of marriage and the imbalance of interest between male and female couples. The contrasting perspective however comes from, Deborah Cameron, author of, “What Language Barrier”. Cameron conveys that the stereotypes left upon male and female communication
In the introduction of Deborah Tannen’s “Conversation Style: Talking on the Job”, she compares and contrasts the ways men and women communicate. This reminds me of what I tell people that are struggling in their relationships. Women and men express themselves differently. Women think, but men act. If you can’t wrap your head around this, being in a relationship with anyone is going to be hard. Yet, this is such a basic way of looking at this issue. Not only are the genders vastly different, but each person relates to the world around them in a certain way. He or she also needs to be related to in a specific way. Looking at personalities and personal histories can give a better look at the way we communicate with each other. Tannen examines
...a meaningful communication to take place. In conclusion, there are differences between men and women that go beyond social nurture. These differences have their origin in their genes. The differences evident in men and women are translated in their behavior and communication. There are possibilities of these differences in their turn raising the problem of failing to understand one another because in a communication men and women have a different set of expectations from each other. It is essential to understand and appreciate these differences for a meaningful communication to take place.
Men and women are more different than one can imagine. Though the main difference is in physical appearance, another difference is their sense of communication. Women appear to talk more than males, but like to keep their conversations more private. Males, on the other hand, will talk less, but do not mind their conversations being more public. This is just one of many examples of men and women being completely opposite of one another in terms of communication. Each gender has their own expectations of the opposite. These expectations are not usually met due to communication differences, which leads to criticisms such as, “Men do not listen” or “Women will never understand” to form. The most common assumption for why expectations are not met
...or a relationship”. In genderlects, there is no superior or inferior method of communication, but rather, men and women just communicate differently. By understanding these differences, one can reduce the amount of misunderstandings in future conversations.
Essentially, we are all different. We use language differently and interpret language differently. This is what we base our perceptions of others on, thus it is ultimately what dictates our interaction with others. The fact that men’s and women’s interaction differs because the two sexes generally interpret things differently is not a strange phenomenon, because we are all different.