What does the show, "The Bachelor", say about our expectations for love in our culture?
The search for love is a dilemma most people are faced with at some point. Many different reality shows have been released over the years focusing on relationships. However the television show, The Bachelor, takes reality T.V. dating to the next level. Different from most dating reality T.V. shows, the participants on The Bachelor are looking for much more than just a relationship; the end goal is a proposal. The show revolves around a single bachelor who is essentially dating an entire group of woman, typically starting the first episode with around 25. As the show advances the bachelor eliminates women by not offering them a rose during the ceremony. All of the women that do receive a rose are invited to stay another week at the house while continuing to go on dates with the same man. Early in the season, the bachelor goes on large group dates with all of women at once but as the season progresses; the remaining women are also invited on one-on-one dates. The problem with this show is that it depicts love in an illogical way. Because she is the last woman, the bachelor’s logic dictates that she must be the right woman for him. The women and the bachelor of the show are whisked away to romantic and tropical areas to live while dating each other. Aside from the fact that the man these women are dating also is dating 24 other women, the participants in this show are completely removed from actual reality. There is no strain or issues that they have to work through like the real world with honest relationships. In this paper I will explain the issues with The Bachelor and what affects it has on our culture. My research question is: What does...
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... together. Just because a person feels passionate love does not mean it leads to companionate love. The Bachelor leads our culture to believe that simply by longing to be with someone means you are in love. If our culture continues to attempt to keep up with the definition of love according to The Bachelor then real love, companionate love, might fade out all together.
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Dating back to the early 1900’s and all the way through to the present, romantic relationships have been viewed differently. From strict unwritten dating regulations to not having regulations at all, recent generations have become more liberated in making their own decisions. The progressing times have made us become a more accepting society and have caused a decrease in the strong practice of religion and class. Even though differences such as religion and class in relationships were more than an issue they were not always a complete deterrence.
Weinberger, M. I., Hofstein, Y., & Whitbourne, S. (2008). Intimacy in young adulthood as a
Barr, A., Bryan, A., & Kenrick, D. T. (2002). Sexual peak: Socially shared cognitions about desire, frequency, and satisfaction in men and women. Personal Relationships, 9(3), 287-299. doi:10.1111/1475-6811.09305
Ninety percent of Americans marry by the time that they are fifty; however, forty to fifty percent of marriages end in divorce ("Marriage and Divorce"). Love and marriage are said to go hand in hand, so why does true love not persist? True, whole-hearted, and long-lasting love is as difficult to find as a black cat in a coal cellar. Loveless marriages are more common than ever, and the divorce rate reflects this. The forms of love seen between these many marriages is often fleeting. Raymond Carver explores these many forms of love, how they create happiness, sadness, and anything in between, and how they contrast from true love, through his characters in "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love". Four couples are presented: Mel and Terri, Nick and Laura, Ed and Terri, and, most importantly, an unnamed elderly couple; each couple exhibits a variation on the word love.
In the article, “The Radical Idea of Marrying for Love” author Stephanie Coontz argues that love is not a good enough reason to get married. People shouldn’t marry just because they love one another, Coontz suggests that perhaps marriage should be based on how well a couple gets along and whether or not if the significant other is accepted by the family. One will notice in the article that Coontz makes it very clear that she is against marrying because of love. In the article is a bit of a history lesson of marriage and love within different cultures from all over the world. Coontz then states her thesis in the very end of the article which is that the European and American ways of marriage is the
As any romantic will assert, love is by far the most powerful force known to human hearts and minds. This sentiment is espoused throughout history, almost to the point of cliché. Everyone has heard the optimistic statement, “love conquers all,” and The Beatles are certain, however idyllic it may be, that “all you need is love.” Humanity is convinced that love is unique within human emotion, unequalled in its power to both lift the spirit up in throws of ecstasy, and cast it down in utter despair.
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Every 13 seconds, couples in America get divorced (Palacios). What is pushing these couples to get married if half of the marriages fail anyway? Leading into the 21st century, people decide to choose the single life over the married life, and use their energy and time towards rebounding, money, material love, power, freedom, pride, and their career. Superficial love often conquers idealistic love in today’s society due to one’s self-interest persuading them away from love.
Do you know the guiltiest pleasure of the American public? Two simple words reveal all—reality TV. This new segment of the TV industry began with pioneering shows like MTV’s The Real World and CBS’s Survivor. Switch on primetime television nowadays, and you will become bombarded by and addicted to numerous shows all based on “real” life. There are the heartwarming tales of childbirth on TLC, melodramas of second-rate celebrities on Celebrity Mole, and a look into a completely dysfunctional family on The Osbornes. Yet, out of all these entertaining reality shows arises the newest low for popular culture, a program based on the idea of a rich man or woman in search of the perfect marriage partner. The Bachelor, and its spin-off The Bachelorette, exemplify capitalist ideology founded on the Marxist base-superstructure model and establish the role of an active American audience.
Erikson saw the development of inatimate relationships as the crucial task of young adulthood. The need to form strong, stable, close, caring relationship is a powerful motivate of human behaviour. An important elemen of intimacy is self-disclosure, ‘revealing important information about oneself to another’ (Collins & Miller, 1994, p 457). People become intimate and remain intimate through shared disclosures, responsiveness to one another’s need and mutual acceptance and respect (Harvey & Omarzu,1997, Reis & Patrick, 1996).
Love is an incredible, affectionate feeling that can be experienced multiple times, over and over again. The actual definition of romantic love has been continuously altered in the minds of men as time progressed, but what about women? We compare arranged marriages and marriages as to whether they are the result of romance, or simply if one loves the other, and then usually the two engage in matrimony. Although, Anjula Razdan explains, “The point of Western romantic ideal is to live ‘happily ever after’, yet nearly half of all marriages in this country end in divorce, and the number of never-married adults grows every year” (251). She argues if falling in love so many times and ending in heartbreak are really worth it, due to the fact she came from a family that strictly proposed arranged marriages. Society agrees that when you meet that “special someone” you are supposed to be with the rest of your life, that you will know at the instant you lock eyes with them. For some of us that may never happen throughout our busy lives, but on the contrary, for the lucky people that do fall in love, it is the best feeling in the world. Some of us may meet them when we are young and out-going, while others may not meet them until
English fashion model Georgia Jagger has made the bold statement that “Reality TV rots people 's brains”. This seems to be a common opinion among many people. Which leads one to wonder why these reality programs are still created year after year despite all of the constant criticism. The reality T.V. show that continue to reel in audiences on a weekly basis seem to be those which have to do with finding love. These types of shows can, and are often, altered to keep the genre from going stale, but essentially they all serve the same purpose. Dating shows aim to match up complete stranger in an attempt of finding “true love”. Although most shows recycle the same program with slight differences, their audience does not seem to go down. The reason
Love is in the air. Although this may sound like a cliche it is true. Love is prevalent in every society all around the world. The feelings associated with love may be the same all over, but how love is approached can vary. Dating and marriage customs are different from country to country; Japan, in particular has very unique dating and marriage procedures. Japan is a located in Southeastern Asia. The Japanese tend to share some very different ideas concerning dating and marriage. However, some of our beliefs and morals have spread into the culture of the Japanese. Nevertheless, Japan holds strong to their roots and their unique culture. Similarly, we tend to narrow our beliefs on their ideas as looking through another paradigm from a different culture provides a glimpse into another society and how love is constructed and held together.
Bridget Burke Ravizza wrote the article, “Selling Ourselves on the Marriage Market” and is an assistant professor of religious studies at St. Norbert College, De Pere, WI. After talking with an unnamed group of college students, she discovers that “These college students have grown up in a society in which nearly half of all marriages end in divorce.” She also reveals “they are fearful that their future marriages will go down that path, and some question whether lifelong commitment can—or should—be made at all.” Furthermore, Ravizza finds that “students are bombarded with messages about sexuality and relationships—indeed messages about themselves—that seem to undermine authentic relationships.” Simply put, culture has accepted divorce as a “normal” thing and has already begun to affect the next generations. The surveyed students are so fearful of divorce, they are, in essence, afraid of marriage as well. They even go to the extreme of avoiding divorce by saying they may not get married at all to prevent the “undermining of an authentic relationship.”
Men and women have participated in a ritual that has been embedded in existence since the dawn of time. Beginning at young ages, humans start learning to master the art of attracting someone of the opposite sex, in hopes to find the perfect mate. Through time, there have been many ways for one to achieve the goal of finding their mate. In American culture, many different aspects have been approached regarding the discovery of “the perfect mate.” Only through technological advances and societal changes has courtship evolved into what it is today. Many traditions have been upheld regarding courtship and marriage, but if it not through time and evolution, many marriages would still be arranged, and divorce would still be nearly illegal, simply due to the fact that many people would not want to marry the first and only person they ever dated.