In the coming-of-age short story “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” by Joyce Carol Oates, a fifteen year old girl named Connie has an incident involving a strange man, Arnold Friend, that causes her to grow up quickly and causes her to see the real world for the first time. Through this incident, the author shows how Connie’s vanity, love of music, and her life without a father figure lead her to not be able to handle situations where a person uses those qualities against her; therefore, she has a harsh and quick coming of age. Narcissistic is a word that completely and easily encompasses Connie. A multitude of times, Connie looks in the mirror to inspect her appearance. She often looks at other people to compare the magnitude of …show more content…
Connie is no exception to the fact that music does deeply influence people. Before Arnold came to her house, Connie had been listening to Bobby King, a soul singer. When Arnold pulled up to her house, Connie heard the same Bobby King song playing in Arnold’s car that she had been listening to before. The lyrics in Bobby King’s songs endorse dark and romantic ideas. One song, “At the Dark End of the Street,” tells the story of how two lovers meet up in a dark alley. These songs that talk about outlandish versions of love muffle her understanding of true love. So, when Arnold often says phrases like the ones found on page 47, “Yes, I’m your lover. You don’t know what that is but you will,” Connie believes him. Also, because she has an opaque understanding of love, she doesn’t understand that the world is full of people who will use young people that are still trying to comprehend the world. When Connie finally realizes that particular people will use her own incompetence about love and how music influences her against her, the situation had gone too far out of Connie’s hands. Similar to how Connie doesn’t understand true love, Connie doesn’t understand how to act around
A theme that runs through this story is that music seems to be the bridge from the real world into Connie's fantasy world. She doesn't know what she wants, but it's got something to do with "the music that made everything so good." When Arnold Friend drove up the driveway, Connie was listening to music, "bathed in a glow of slow-pulsed joy." She soon discovered that he was playing the same music in his car. This is not a coincidence; I think it makes a connection in the back of Connie's mind. And, the story says that it seemed to Connie like Arnold "had come from nowhere," and "belonged nowhere," and that everything about him "was only half real."
In “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been” by Joyce Carol Oates, Connie is a normal teenage girl who is approached outside her home by a guy named Arnold Friend who threatens to harm her, and she obeys, if she does not get in the car with him. Connie is the main character in this story who teaches us that sometimes we might search for adult independence too early before we are actually ready to be independent and on our own. Connie is so focused on her appearance that she works hard to create a mature and attractive adult persona that will get her attention from guys. This search for independence conflicts with Connie’s relationship with her family and their protection of her. Connie’s insecurity and low self-esteem is triggered by her fear of intimacy. Connie confuses having the attention of men with actually having them pursue her in a sexual way.
Joyce Carol Oates’s short story “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” clearly illustrates the loss of innocence adolescents experience as they seek maturity, represented by Connie's dangerous encounter with Arnold Friend. Connie symbolizes the many teens that seek independence from their family in pursuit of maturity. Connie’s great desire to grow up is apparent from the beginning of the story, as she experiments with her sexuality. However, it is clear that Connie is not interested in pursuing a relationship, but relishes the maturity she feels after being with the opposite sex. After following a boy to his car, she was “gleaming with a joy that had nothing to do with Eddie or even this place” (2). This suggests that Connie's exploits
Joyce Carol Oates intrigues readers in her fictional piece “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been” by examining the life of a fifteen year old girl. She is beautiful, and her name is Connie. Oates lets the reader know that “everything about her [Connie] had two sides to it, one for home, and one for anywhere but home (27). When Connie goes out, she acts and dresses more mature than she probably should. However, when she is at home, she spends the majority of her time absorbed with daydreams “about the boys she met”(28). This daydreaming behavior is observable to the reader throughout the story. From theories about dreams, theories about subconscious thought, and the clues that Oates provides, the reader is lead to believe that Connie’s experience with Arnold Friend is a nightmare used to awaken her to the consequences that her behavior could result in.
Coming-of-age stories commonly record the transitions—sometimes abrupt, or even violent—from youth to maturity, from innocence to experience of its protagonist, whether male or female. Greasy Lake by T.Coraghessan Boyle and Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been? by Joyce Carol Oates are great examples of traditional coming-of-age stories. The roots of the coming-of-age narrative theme are tracked in the male protagonist’s perspective for Boyle’s short story, while the Oates’ story captures the coming-of-age theme from Connie; a female protagonist’s perspective. In both short stories, the authors fulfill the expectations of a coming-of-age genre when they take us through the journey of rebellion and self realization, as the
Ignorance and vanity can be good, in small amounts, but too much can lead to very unwelcome consequences. Connie, a teenage girl who can’t get enough of herself, learned this the hard way when a strange man by the name of Arnold Friend arrives at her house with the intent of taking her on a ‘date’. Instead of calling the police or locking herself in, like common sense would imagine, Connie uneasily greets Arnold from her door when he gets out of his car, instantly letting her vanity and ignorance get the best of her. Joyce Carol Oates shocks the reader with the twist ending in her short story “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been” in which after hearing Arnold’s threat towards her family, Connie hands herself over to Arnold allowing him
”Where Are You Going? Where Have You Been?” is a short story written by Joyce Carol Oates, which explores the life of a teenage girl named Connie. One of the issues this story divulges is the various stresses of adolescence. Connie, like so many others, is pressured to conform according to different social pressures, which displays the lack of respect female adolescents face. The music culture, young men, and family infringe upon young female minds to persuade them to look or act in certain ways, showing a disrespect for these girls. While some perhaps intend their influence for good, when put into practice, the outcome often has a negative effect. Moreover, this can lead young women to confusion and a lack of self-respect, which proves
During the teenage years they no longer want to be labeled the “child; matter of fact, they have a strong desire to rebel against the family norms and move quickly into adulthood. This transition and want for freedom can be a very powerful and frightening thing as there are evils in this world that cannot be explained. Most parents try to understand and give their teens certain freedoms, but at what expense? Joyce Oates gives us a chilly story about a teenager that wanted and craved this freedom of adulthood called “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?”. This is a haunting story of a young girl by the name of Connie who gives us a glimpse of teenager transitioning from childhood with the need for freedom and the consequences of her actions. Connie is described as a very attractive girl who did not like her role in the family unit. She was the daughter who could not compare to her older sister and she felt her Mom showed favoritism towards her sister. Connie is your average teen who loves music, going out with friends, and she likes the attention she receives from boys. During this time, Connie is also growing into her sexuality and is obsessing with her looks as she wants and likes to be noticed by the opposite sex. Her sexual persona and need to be free will be what is fatal to her character’s life and well-being.
Conclusion: The author Evan Hunter, of the story, “On The Sidewalk Bleeding” successfully demonstrates the theme of Coming of Age as he shifted his main character from an adolescent, idealistic view of the world to a more mature and realistic view. The character matured from making ignorant and selfish decisions to a more knowledgeable and selfless decisions. Andy came of age from a boy to a man, as he lay on the street bleeding to death. All in all these newly developed characteristics all prove the genre of coming of
In the story “Where are you going, Where have you been?” by Joyce Carol Oates, the main character, Connie, experiences life not having an actively participating mother or father. Most adolescents struggle with the transition from teen-age years to adulthood. For many, this is where the parents step in. Parents are meant to support and help an adolescent when needed, especially during this difficult transition; however, this is not always true. In Connie’s case, her parents allowed her to make the change alone and endure hard times. As a result, she lacked the values needed to survive. Such values are used to equip a young person for the real world and the tragedies that come with it. As seen in “Where are you going, Where have you been?”, Connie was a victim of poor guidance and empty judgment. The dysfunctional family’s behavior was reflected in Connie. Her mother envied her, and her father was not an active figure in her life. Connie 's
Healthy narcissism is a mature, balanced love of oneself coupled with a stable sense of self-worth and self-esteem. Healthy narcissism implies knowledge of one's boundaries and a proportionate and realistic appraisal of one's achievements and traits.10 This implies that a leader, like Stephen Harper for example may be is more likely a narcissist rather than psychopath. He knows his limits, and does not try and overachieve something that is not within reach, keeping a realistic view of the world but still seeing himself on top. Psychopaths rarely seek Narcissistic Supply. Pathological narcissism is wrongly described as too much healthy narcissism (or too much self-esteem).11 Yet, we often find that narcissists abandon their efforts in mid-stream,
Joyce Carol Oates’s “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” tells the tale of a fifteen year old girl named Connie living in the early 1960’s who is stalked and ultimately abducted by a man who calls himself Arnold Friend. The short story is based on a true event, but has been analyzed by many literary scholars and allegedly possesses numerous underlying themes. Two of the most popular interpretations of the story are that the entire scenario is only dreamt by Connie (Rubin, 58) and that the abductor is really the devil in disguise (Easterly, 537). But the truth is that sometimes people really can just be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Connie, a victim of terrifying circumstance will be forever changed by her interactions with Friend.
Firstly, what is exactly narcissism? The word ‘narcissism’ was derived from an ancient Greek myth of Narcissus. Narcissus was depicted as a handsome young man who adored his looks very much. Many young maidens fell in love with him but he criticizes them for being too ugly for him. One day, he fell in love with his own reflection in a pool of water. However, he accidentally drowned himself as he tried to touch his reflection. Hence, the word ‘narcissism’ is usually depicted as a personality that reflects excessive of self-love on oneself. Individuals who are narcissistic are usually described as somebody who is selfish, snobbish or proud. This is because narcissistic individual processes information obtained differently than others. They believe that they deserve more than others since they think they are more superior in every aspect. Due to their sense of grandiosity, they will do anything in order t...
In her famous short story, “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been,” Joyce Carol Oates shows the transition from childhood to adulthood through her character Connie. Each person experiences this transition in their own way and time. For some it is leaving home for the first time to go to college, for others it might be having to step up to a leadership position. No matter what, this transition affects everyone; it just happens to everyone differently. Oates describes Connie's unfortunate coming of age in a much more violent and unexpected way than the typical coming of age story for a fifteen year old girl.
As I began reading “Where are you going, where have you been?” by Joyce Carol Oates I found myself relating the experiences of Connie, the girl in the story, to my own personal experiences. She spoke of going to a friend’s house and having her friend’s father drive them to the shopping mall so that they could walk around and socialize or go see a movie. I found that this related very closely with my own experiences of being fifteen years old because it was always someone else’s parents driving my friends and I to the movies or to the mall.