Although a personal statement is supposed to be mine, in the back of my head, I was thinking that an admission officer would look at this sheet of paper I had written and base my admission on it. Then I felt that although this was supposed to be my story, it was not really what I wanted to say because the purpose was to please someone else. At a certain point, all creativity was gone and my only goal was to have a perfect personal statement. The need to have a perfect personal statement did not allow me to write an essay that was truly me. I already had my mind set that I was going to write what I thought the reader wanted to hear instead of what I truly wanted.
I knew what people had said their personal reasons were, but I didn’t know how to incorporate that information with my own personal feelings about stories. It wasn’t until after the second set of peer reviews that I realized that just taking their comments, which there weren’t many of, into consideration, I needed to follow my own gut feelings about my paper; my felt sense. I felt like something was very wrong with it, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. If I were a more experienced writer, perhaps I would have kept writing, not until I had filled the required amount of pages, but until I had found the words that I was searching for.
Regardless of my expectations, I had been stuck with an assignment I didn’t want to do. I kept asking myself why on earth I should write about writing[d2] . For that matter, I didn’t understand what purpose it would serve. At first I just viewed the topic as a way to give W131 students more homework. Perhaps it was a way of cruel fate driving me over the edge of sanity.
I feel when assigned an essay I freak out on how to make it seem smart enough and clean it up enough to at least a “B” essay because I know getting that “A” is a stretch. The most frustrating aspects of writing for me are writing the hook, the thesis statement, and being my own worst critic. Getting the reader 's attention is not as easy as I thought. In the past, I never put much into the hook. I really just thought there are other aspects that are more important, but in the back of my head I was never happy with just an okay opening.
Expectations and assignments were different than what I was used. Something I had never done before was use citations, so incorporating them into my paper was a major challenge. Up until now the closest I had been to a research argumentative paper would’ve been either a persuasive essay which doesn’t compare to such a complex novel. Heart of Darkness changed this and in writing my paper I had to think critically about what Joseph Conrad meant and decide how to explain the quote after inserting it. At first I didn’t know how to do it but after practicing a bit I got the hang of it and now instead of simply stating “Conrad is a racist because he said he saw “a certain enormous buck nigger” and that he “fixed [his] conception of blind, furious, unreasoning rage” so he’s a racist for talking like this about them (Achebe 10).
When I first entered this class, I already knew that it wasn’t going to be easy just because I 'm not good with putting things into words and explaining myself with proper grammar. I can honestly say English 101 has really inspired me to be a better writer. This class affected me in a lot of ways it showed me that writing takes time and you can 't expect a paper to be great without any revising or editing. That has always been a mistake of mine, I would tend to free write a lot it seemed to be the only way I could get my thoughts processed on a paper. I would forget periods, commas and misspell words without even noticing.
That sentence could use better organization, different vocabulary, and less... ... middle of paper ... ...take, but those things happen and I had to suffer the consequences. I’m not going to say that I didn’t learn in this class because I did. I learned how to correctly organize my thoughts into good arguments with fact to back them up. I learned how to change my tone when I speak to different audiences. Still, I don’t think this semester was as much about me learning, as me accepting that fact that I’m not the greatest writer in the world.
Writing is a process I’ve grown to despise. Ever since grade school, I’ve had problems trying to express my ideas on paper. My writing process involves thinking about what’s being asked and trying to reflect my thoughts the best way I can on paper, but my thoughts don’t always come out as clear as I want them to be sometimes leaving a question not fully answered. My writing process isn’t a consistent set in stone process, but since being in ENC 1101 I always follow some of the same parameters such as revising my drafts, grammar usage and considering context and audience. According to Donald M. Murray in The Makers Eye: Revising Your Own Manuscripts “A piece of writing is never finished”.
I still then could not recognize the theme of the story or the author’s purpose for writing the narrative. English 2 and 3 were also a struggle because teachers could not advise me about my writing; they simply told me “The thesis statement must be very vague.The body paragraphs must have two concrete detail and commentary to follow. The conclusion needs to paraphrase the entire essay.” I thought “if my teacher’s advice is difficult to understand then writing essays is even more difficult to
Entering English Comp one, I had fears of what the class would be like. I realized that I had many weaknesses, but it was not till the end of the class that I learned my strengths. When I first entered Comp one I was very nervous. Everyone had told me that Mrs. Garth was a really tough teacher, therefore; that kinda made me second guess my opinion to take the class. When we started writing I learned that my main weakness was getting my point across while staying on topic.