Physical Attractiveness Is Not Everything

There is a misconception in society today that suggests that physical attractiveness is everything. It is the notion that one must be outwardly attractive in order to attract a partner. It is a widely circulated myth that is perpetuated by the media. Flawless models show off the latest fashion. Television stars caked in makeup display their wrinkle-less faces. Women’s magazines tell people how to lose weight and become desirable. The aim of this essay is to disprove the idea that aesthetic perfection is necessary to be successful in love by discussing three non-physical elements of interpersonal attraction: reciprocity of romantic attraction, proximity and familiarity, and attitudinal similarity.

Reciprocity of liking is the idea that one begins to have romantic attraction towards somebody only when that person states their desire for them. There are numerous social-psychological theories which predict the emergence of this phenomena. One of these is the Interdependence Theory, which suggests that we will like people with whom we have pleasant interactions (Eastwick & Finkel, 2009, p. 1333). Reciprocity of liking has been noted as one of the fundamental principles of romantic attraction and is perhaps the strongest indicator of a successful relationship (Reis, Maniaci, Caprariello, Eastwick, & Finkel, 2011, p. 557). An experiment was conducted at a university in the United States in which a female participant was sat in front of a number of male participants and listened attentively to each of them whilst making eye contact and generally acting very friendly with them. Despite the female disagreeing on various issues with the males, the general interest in her from the males increased after their discussions (Gold, Ryckman, & Mo...

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...cator of a healthy relationship. It is an integral feature of the courting process and is a large component for many people when developing feelings for another person. Meanwhile, proximity is also important as it predicts romantic liking. When people are in contact with one another on a regular basis, a bond based on familiarity is formed, leading to potential romantic interest. This may also be aided by similarity - a feeling of commonality between two persons that is also a predictor of romantic liking. However, there are studies that do proclaim physical attractiveness to be key for a lot of people, and that there are certain advantages for those who are conventionally attractive. Nevertheless, as evidenced in this essay, reciprocity, proximity, and similarity are influential elements of romantic attraction. Therefore, physical attractiveness is not everything.