As we move through our daily lives, most people at some time experience a sense of disconnection, of not conforming to the box. When these challenges come in the form of sexual orientation they can create a great deal of confusion, fear, and resentment. It can become a lifelong journey to sort these out, not only for the person in the dilemma, but their families as well. In her poem “In the Counselor’s Waiting Room,” Bettie Sellers touches on many of these issues. The guilt associated with being discovered with the “quiet girl down the hall,” the rejection of that lifestyle by her family, and the narrator’s own sense of confusion over this “outing” are revealed in this brief thirteen line poem ( line 9). The “terra cotta girl” is wracked with guilt over the affair, yet she sits reading an existentialist book. This implies she is exploring her personal freedom to choose (line 1; line 5). Martha Barron Barrett spent one year of her life interviewing 125 lesbian / bisexual women for her book Invisible Lives: The Truth About Women-Loving Women. The women of these stories com...
Despite the transition, little consideration has been given to understanding the growing population of gay adolescents. 25% of American families are likely to have a gay child (Hidalgo 24); In the United States, three million adolescents are estimated to be homosexual. Yet, American society still ignores gay adolescents. Majority of children are raised in heterosexual families, taught in heterosexual establishments, and put in heterosexual peer groups. Gay adolescents often feel forced by parents to pass as “heterosexually normal” (Herdt 2). As a result, homosexual teens hide their sexual orientation and feelings, especially from their parents. Limited research conducted on gay young adults on disclosure to parents generally suggests that disclosure is a time of familial crisis and emotional distress. Very few researchers argue that disclosure to parents results in happiness, bringing parents and children closer (Ben-Ari 90).
I chose to start this paper by quoting an entire poem of Anne Sexton's. Why? Because no one told the story of Anne Sexton's life as often or as well as Anne Sexton herself. Over and over she wrote, recounted, and recast her struggles with madness, her love affairs, her joys and griefs in parenting, and her religious quests. For example, "Rowing" touches upon the need for Anne to tell stories about herself, her longing for connection with others, her mental problems, and her searching for God - one could not ask for a better introduction to the world of Anne Sexton.
Andrew Sullivan, author of, What is a Homosexual, portrays his experience growing up; trapped in his own identity. He paints a detailed portrait of the hardships caused by being homosexual. He explains the struggle of self-concealment, and how doing so is vital for social acceptation. The ability to hide one’s true feelings make it easier to be “invisible” as Sullivan puts it. “The experience of growing up profoundly different in emotional and psychological makeup inevitably alters a person’s self-perception.”(Sullivan)This statement marks one of the many reasons for this concealment. The main idea of this passage is to reflect on those hardships, and too understand true self-conscious difference. Being different can cause identity problems, especially in adolescents.
Technically a lyric, the poem filled with narrative and drama: an off-the-farm college girl, a Southerner, and perhaps a Georgian like Sellers herself, has fallen in love with a “quiet girl down the hall” (9). The girl’s conservative mother “has seen to” (10) having her daughter seek for an expert help. Ungraceful, conflicted inwardly, and beset outwardly by parental pressure, the girl now waits to see a counselor. No character speaks, but the role of each is well defined. At least five characters, perhaps six, come into play: two girls, their two mothers, and one or maybe two counselors. Onstage is the “terra cotta girl” (1)--and maybe her mother as well. The other, “quiet” (9) daughter and her mother, along with a counselor (perhaps the same one), running a parallel to the scene we are witnessing.
Within the last decade, it has come out that Lucy Maud Montgomery, the beloved writer of Anne of Green Gables had potentially committed suicide. This has pushed readers and critics alike to read deeper into her novels in order to discover precursor signs of a dark depression that she experienced for a substantial period of time. That being said, Lucy Maud Montgomery’s opinions and feelings are certainly reflected in her works, and more particularly in her biggest success Anne of Green Gables. The story, according to blank, acts as a vehicle to uncover Maud’s deepest emotions and also her, “social outlook” (1) To begin with, Montgomery makes a direct line of connection between the events of Anne’s life and her own, which only serves to point
In this short essay “Context” (1994), written by Allison Dorothy, the author Dorothy explores the fear of not being accepted by her lover and family due to her sexual preference and lower class status. She demonstrates on how her lover might react to how different their life styles are. Dorothy describes her lover’s upper class life style in order to make the readers understand why she fears her lover’s reaction with her family. The intended audience for this short story is for people who can relate to the emotional process of having a different sexual preferences and fearing the acceptance by their loved ones.
Coming out, regardless of what one is coming out as, is incredibly difficult. An important aspect of accepting ones’ sexuality is the support that one gets from others of the same sexuality. “This support comes not only from loved ones … but also from associating with like-minded others in the gay, lesbians, and bisexual communities” (McLean 63). However, even in a group that’s been discriminated against by heterosexuals, there is an outstanding amount biphobia in the LGBT community.
The term sexual orientation is known as the preference of one’s sexual partners, whether the same sex, opposite sex, or both sexes. Sexual orientation occurs when a child reaches the adolescent stages in life (Broderick & Blewitt, 2015). Adolescents activate their sexual orientation within four steps that create their identity. Adolescents are unaware of their identity at the beginning stages of sexual orientation. They work their way into the exploration stage by learning their preference of sexual partners. Once they are aware of their sexual identity, they will start the process of acceptance. Once acceptance is achieved, they will begin to integrate their sexual orientation into their lives (Gallor & Fassinger, 2010).
There are several theorists that have presented models on sexual identity development. Many of the models have stages of sexual identity development suggesting that certain characteristics are present during a specific period. However, Anthony D’Augelli presents a model that suggests processes rather than stages. These processes take place over the span of one’s life and not necessarily in any specific order or fashion. D’Augelli’s (1994a) life span model of lesbian, gay and bisexual (LGB) identity development takes into account “the complex factors that influence the development of people in context over historical time” (Evans et al, 2010). According to D’Augelli’s (1994) theory, identity formation includes three sets of interrelated variables that are involved in identity formation: personal actions and subjectivities, interactive intimacies, and sociohistorical connections. Personal subjectivities and actions include individuals’ perceptions and feelings about their sexual identities as well as actual sexual behaviors and the meanings attached to them. Interactive intimacies include the influences of family, peer group, and intimate partnerships and the meanings attached to experiences with significant others. Sociohistorical connections are defined as the social norms, policies and laws found in various geographical locations and cultures, as well as the values existing during particular historical periods (Evans et al, 2010).
Genetics, biology, and upbringing are all key aspects in determining one’s sexual orientation. Many of the factors are combined to make up how a person feels or who he or she is attracted to. There is no definite answer to why someone has a particular orientation, but there are studies that sugge...
The sexual orientation of a person has been a critical debate over the past several centuries. For several...
In today's society, there exists a mixture of issues which tend to raise arguments with people all over. There are a handful of topics that always seem to escalate these differences between people to the point where one who earnestly participates in discussion, debate and argument can direct their anger towards their feelings on the person themselves. Some examples of such delicate subjects are the death penalty, abortion, and euthanasia. An issue that has in recent years, begun to increase arguments, is the acceptability of homosexuality in society. Until recently, homosexuality was considered strictly taboo. If an individual was homosexual, it was considered a secret to be kept from all family, friends, and society. However, it seem that society has begun to accept this lifestyle by allowing same sex couples. The idea of coming out of the 'closet' has moved to the head of homosexual individuals when it used to be the exception. Homosexuality is nothing to be ashamed of and we should all come to realize this.
In order to discuss the biology of gender identity and sexual orientation, it is necessary to first examine the differences between multiple definitions that are often mistakenly interchanged: sex, gender, sexual orientation, and gender identity. Sexual orientation is defined by LeVay (2011) as “the trait that predisposes us to experience sexual attraction to people of the same sex as ourselves, to persons of the other sex, or to both sexes” (p. 1). The typical categories of sexual orientation are homosexual, heterosexual and bisexual. Vrangalova and Savin-Williams (2012) found that most people identify as heterosexual, but there are also groups of people that identify as mostly heterosexual and mostly gay within the three traditional categories (p. 89). This is to say that there are not three concrete groups, but sexual orientation is a continuum and one can even fluctuate on it over time. LeVay (2011) also defines gender as “the ...
Savin-Williams, Ritch C. Mom, Dad, I'm Gay: How Families Negotiate Coming out. Washington, DC: American Psychological Association, 2001. Print.
Then we have sexual behavior: what sex are your partners? And finally, we have sexual identity: how do you think of yourself are you gay, straight, or bisexual? Some of us develop feelings of attraction to a one type of sex before we self-label our sexual identity. Others engage in sexual behavior before they’re sure how they want to self-identify. There’s no standard for how sexual orientation emerges, and it can often be a fluid process, with attraction, behavior, and identity changing over time (Burriss, 2015). Attraction occurs in adolescence and can occur with a first romance or first sexual experience. It is common for adolescents to experience same-sex attractions. Some gay youth experience opposite-sex attractions, sometimes before same-sex attractions. Teens are moving toward forming their own sexual orientation and identity. Previous studies report that more than 60% of the boys acknowledged opposite-sex attractions and 80% of same-sex–attracted girls. Boys reported that the start of heterosexual attractions happened around the same age as same-sex attractions and occurring usually one to two years earlier than girls. They become overly concerned with whether they are attractive and place more importance on their peer group. Many adolescents may even fall in love for the first time. It is common to experiment sexual and many will have intercourse during adolescence (Kaufman & Tulloch,