One Day I'll Meet Someone

1421 Words3 Pages

All right. I'm bitter. I seem to always be in this state lately, but never more so than after the weekend I've just had. I spent about half a year thinking that I was in love with one of my closest friends, and in the space of about ten minutes he completely obliterated any respect I had for him, while destroying my own self-image in the process.

So I've been friends with this guy for about four years now, and we've been pretty decent friends for most of that time. But in the past year or so, we have gotten much closer. About six months ago, I suddenly had the revelation that I was in love with him. And it was perfect, I thought, because we were so close, and I respected him so much, and we got along so well together, blah blah blah. It didn't matter that he is kinda fat, or not very good looking, or that he has no sense of humor, or that most of my friends don't like him. All that mattered was I knew that deep down he is a good person with a good heart, not to mention smart, honest, and responsible, all qualities I admire in a man. Not to mention the fact that I totally believe that friendships make a good foundation for a relationship, and that my ex-boyfriend was and is still one of my closest friends.

So my feelings for this guy grew stronger while getting to know him better over the past year. Although none of my friends thought he was good enough for me (even the ones who are also friends with him), I would defend him, even when he was rude or acted like a jerk, because I knew he really was a good person at heart.

Finally, after many months of not getting any response from him and wondering if I should tell him how I felt, I decided it was time to get over him. I was sick of waiting for him to wake up and see me, and I was too scared to say anything about how I felt. I went out with another guy, but it didn't work out and then I realized that I was never going to let go of him until I had some sort of closure, however lame that sounds.

Late one night after a disastrous date, I saw him online and IM'ed him.

Open Document