My Micro Moments

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My Micro-Moment What is love? We all have our own fantasies about what love will be like when that train finally makes it to our station. We, as a Western culture, think of love as a pot of gold that only the luckiest of us will stumble upon, as something only experienced when the Prince carries you away on a noble steed, as only legitimate when you are “in” it. These fantasies don't do much for us in terms of promoting well being, so I decided to reevaluate my take on love. In an effort to redefine what love looks like for myself, I simply looked up the word. To my surprise love does not have a very expansive, comprehensive definition. It is actually defined quite literally from the Merriam Webster Dictionary as an “intense feeling of deep affection.” thats it. Its almost humorous how such a simple word has acquired such an unreachable, illusory place in our minds. This idea is also drawn upon largely by Barbara Fredrickson in her book Love 2.0. Fredrickson combats the typical westernized fairytale view of love with her own theory, the idea of “Micro-moment positivity resonance” this is the idea that love is characterized by strong positively charged moments, which are shared between you and any other person in your day to day life. There are two conditions to the effectiveness of this theory; one being there must be an internal and external sense of safety, Two being there must be real time physical sensory connection. Once those conditions are met even a small shared connection will prove to be extremely beneficial to ones happiness. Fredrickson takes some of the rarity away from our perception of what love is, and leaves us with something more attainable. Because love and happiness are correlated, more love equals more ha... ... middle of paper ... ...t it still brings me joy. Because of this experience I am more open to people and to broader definitions of love. I no longer strive for an illusionary love, I am more easily affected by small gestures of kindness and I allow them to bring me happiness. In summation, love is ubiquitous. Its scattered throughout day to day life, only to be found in the most unsuspected places. If we could learn to accept love for what it really is, i.e a shared positive emotional connection, happiness may flow more easily. Love isn't only the grand gesture at the end of a romantic movie, its not only your mothers undying affection; its that wonderful conversation that you didn't want to end with the man at the grocery store, its a shared smile with a stranger who opened the door for you, it's around us all of the time, we just have to change our perception and learn to see it.

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