It can throw the child's entire life into a whirlwind. Young children, up to age five or six, are the most confused and the most disoriented by their parents’ separation. They often fear they are going to be abandoned by their parents, which causes great anxiety. The loss of a parent is extremely sad to a child of this age because they feel that their needs are not going to be attended to as well as they had before, when their needs are not going to be attended to as well as they had before, when their family was together. Many of the children in this group are worried that they will be left without a family or their parents might have money troubles and they will be deprived of food and toys.
This is why they keep asking their parents to come back together. Their parents will often keep rejecting their request of coming back together, which also causes negative feelings to appear again during divorce. This is not only because their parents reject the child’s request, but also because children compare themselves with other children whose parents are not separated. Furthermore, some children tend to blame themselves for the divorce of their parents because it is emotionally easier for children to blame themselves than to put the blame on someone else. If the child blames himself or herself, he or she would think that they are the reason for the damage that happened in the relationship between their parents.
Divorce is becoming increasingly common among couples in today’s time. It is sad to know that most cases of divorce involve children. Divorce affects the parents but it affects the children much more. Divorce impacts kids greatly, often causing depression, rebellion, or inspiration/motivation, to develop and potentially end up a permanent aspect in their lives. When two parents decide to divorce, their children acquire a really tough pill to swallow.
Imagine the thought of losing everything you have at such a young age, and having to do everything on your own without any help. The thought of losing one’s parents and being put through foster care is a child’s worst nightmare. In the book “Grief Girl” a teenage girl has to endure the pain of losing both of her parents and help take care of her younger brother. Losing a parent is not the only issue children have to deal with, but it is one that is so heartbreaking and overlooked at times. Children can become depressed, suicidal and even lose their appetite, making them become anorexic.
This is a situation through which kids develop inaccurate thoughts as to why their parents are not together. Blame sometimes corrupts the child's thoughts and eventually the child perceives he/she may be the reason their parents separated. Children are left in the dark numerous times. Children develop revulsion towards the parent whom they feel has caused this terrible situation. A constant question, Why?
A study was once performed that showed that und... ... middle of paper ... ...row off this unwanted sense of responsibility, to regress back to the last developmental milestone they had achieved. These children often afraid of being separated from their custodial parents and yearn for their lost parent. Children aged 6-8 will likely openly lament for the departed parent, and often fantasize about replacement or hoping for the parents to get back together in the future. It is especially difficult for children in this age group to understand or comprehend the permanence of divorce. Children aged 8-11 are exceptionally prone to feeling powerlessness or anger in the situation.
When two people decide to get a divorce, their children do not wholly understand what is going on. "Regardless of their age, children usually blame themselves when their parents divorce" (Bankston 382). They don't understand their parents anger at each other, so they believe this is happening because of something they have done. This is why parents need to open up and see that it is not just about themselves, but it is also about the welfare of their children. Children of any age have difficulty expressing hurt feelings and sadness to parents who are themselves angry and grieving.
Financial issues or sharing duties can also be major reason for divorce. Each and every reasons of divorce affect the children’s life differently. In spite of all these reasons, majority of parents don’t care, what will be the affects of divorce on children’s life. How these innocent children handle and adapt to the new environment. Divorce can have both positive and negative affect on children’s life.
Some effects of divorce on children are negative emotions like bitterness, stress, fear, anxiety, feeling abandoned, and loss of self-esteem. When a family goes through a divorce, the children will be afraid of being abandoned, rejected, and can think they are the reason for all the arguing. This can make them angry at their selves and cause some physical problems. Attorneys at Law Krueger and Hernandez (2011) state that some physical effects of divorce are “weight gain or loss, difficulty concentrating, increase in tension, and lack of sleep” (para. 1).