Kristina with a K- Personal Narrative
The year was 1986; it was on this day my life would forever be changed. Up until this point I was a loner, single, an individual. Some people like to be in this state, I wasn't sure that I cared either way. Anyhow, this is where Kristina started.
She spelt her name with a "K" instead of the traditional "C." The name was just one way that she was different. I was never quite sure if she chose to be or not. In that aspect I suppose we were the same.
At first accepting her into my life was a given more than an option, I guess. Kristina was a truly trusting and severely gullible person. She had never really been "street wise." We looked different although we were very much the same.
As years went on, it became more obvious to me she owned a personality foreign to anything I had ever known. Although eventually it became something I found myself dependent upon. I was Webster's definition of "mean" to her.
I found her wanting to be like me an annoyance. Things would come up missing clothing, makeup, and so on. I had mentioned to her early on, as I would for years, that this was not satisfactory to me. She would then rave about how great it would be to be me. Things did not change and never would.
She was an emotional wreck much of the time. We had gone through many of the same experiences. She would begin crying non-stop when words of these situations were spoken. I would do nothing to comfort her. I began to hate her for the weak, emotional stereotyped "girlish" reaction she constantly displayed.
She had always been a high maintenance person. Needing attention, abundant love, and complete acceptance, none of which she ever received from myself. At the time I thought of those things, to be trivial to the "big picture" of my own life and me. She would spend years starving for a sign of acceptance from me.
Everyday she would bug me with, "how does this look?" or "what do you think, what is your advice?" crap I didn't think I needed to hear. She would always advertise something new in her life or an idea of hers.