One of the studies I found talked about how men and women differ in confronting their significant other about extra-partner affairs. The author of this study, Barry X. Khule, had trained undergraduate students watch and code fifty-one episodes of the reality television show Cheaters (Khule, 2011). Individuals who believed they were being cheated on called the show and asked that the Cheater’s Detective Agency (CDA) follow their significant other around for weeks. Then, the CDA provided the victim with video surveillance footage to show whether or not their significant other had actually been cheating on them. The show then gave the victim a chance to confront the cheating mate. The confrontation was also videotaped as part of the show (Khule, 2011). The undergraduate students (coders) were specially trained to listen for key phrases as spoken by the victim (the individual in the show who was being cheated on) that signaled jealousy. Khule hypothesized, based on previous research that men who were being cheated on would be more concerned about the physical aspect of the cheating and would ask questions such as, “How many times have you had sex with him?” Women, he hypothesized, would be more concerned about the emotional aspect of the cheating and would ask questions such as, “Do you love her?” (Khule, 2011). Previous studies have been done on jealousy, but their methods relied on self-report of how participants thought they would feel if they found out their mate had been cheating on them or self-report methods of how participants felt in retrospect of having been cheated on. Khule’s method was different. Instead of relying on what someone thought they would have done, or trying to remember what they had already said and done, K... ... middle of paper ... ...the other, and emotional scarring. My advice for coping with jealousy is that if you’re feeling jealous more than once a week, then the person you are with is probably not good for you. He or she may be intentionally making you jealous. If they are unaware that they are making you jealous, then calmly explain your feelings to your significant other and cite specific examples of times they made you feel jealous. Most importantly, though, don’t use a fighting tone when you talk to him or her. The talk will go much smoother if you remain calm throughout. Works Cited Buss, D. M., & Haselton, M. (2005, November). The evolution of jealousy. TRENDS in Cognitive Science, pp. 506-507. Khule, B. X. (2011, July 31). Did you have sex with him? Do you love her? An in vivo test of sex differences in jealous interrogations. Personality and Individual Differences, pp. 1044–1047.
Insecurity and low self-confidence can be influential and very determining factors in shortening an individual’s life span; especially if you are an individual who is marry and has jealousy issues. In Robert Olen Butler’s short story “Jealous Husband Returns in Form of Parrot Analysis.” We can appreciate the perfect example of how trust issues and not been able to exercise strong communication skills can make you a coward, a miserable, and pathetic low life human being; having such characteristics will eventually deteriorate and liquidate your relationships with your loved ones. In this essay we will analyze the different elements that Robert Olen Butler uses in order to educate
In the research report “Sex Differences in Jealousy: Evolution, Physiology, and Psychology” conducted by Buss, Larsen, Westen, and Semmelroth (1992), the primary purpose of their study is to differentiate the gender differences, particularly in humans. This interest seems to originate from the difference between humans and all of the other animals, whereby paternity is most significant to humans – specifically males. They believe this varies from other animals that can display lowered paternity probability and greater cuckoldry, which stems from female animal’s biological capability of internal female fertilization (251). Hence, females of most species will most certainly know that they are the mother of the off spring, but emotional infidelity from the male partner via spending resources on another female for instance, is a potential consequence experienced by the female giving birth. With men, it differs on the basis of cuckoldry, in the sense that their potential consequence is when their female partner engages in sexual activity with another male – in the animal kingdom it is known as the rival gametes (251). Simply put,
Human social affinity appears to be much more interesting than “nice people are liked” and “aggressive people are disliked.” A more nuanced view emerges when considering the evolutionary functions of behaviors as they relate to dominance. The bulk of psychology considers antisociality and prosociality as opposite ends of a single continuum and, as such, assumes that they serve opposing functions. Here, I have considered them as serving the same function as two sides of the same coin (437).
But some people want others to be jealous on purpose; Baxter and Wilmot describe this as a “secret test.” One of this Secret tests is the Triangle Test, “This strategy is indented to test the partner’s commitment to the relationship by creating three-person triangles” (p. 91) as explained by Guerrero, Andersen and Afifi (2014) in Close Encounters. The jealousy test, which is an example of a Triangle Test, is the act of flirting with someone else to see how the partner responds. In a relationship, each individual want to feel appreciated and to assess this appreciation both men and women might want to set up an image in their partner’s mind that they have a rival. Even though there is no real threat to the relationship the individual’s partner might feel threatened and decides to act on the situation. As Schützwohl (2007) says it in his article, “romantic jealousy is (a) aroused by a perceived threat to a valued romantic relationship generated by a real or imagined attraction between the partner and a (perhaps imaginary) rival and (b) motivates behavior aimed at countering the threat.” The behavior that emerges to counter the threat is what the partner causing the jealousy wants to see. This reaction not only shows affection but a sense of concern over a possible
Whereas emotional jealousy is elicited from the threat of emotional infidelity, that is any form of unfaithfulness that involves a romantic connection and doesn’t necessarily entail the physical act of cheating (Levy, Kelly, & Jack, 2006). It is widely believed that men and women respond differently to infidelity in the way they think and act (Buss, Larsen, Westen & Semmelroth, 1992; Takahashi et al., 2006; Walum et al., 2013). Past research has found that women tend to report more intense emotions in response to infidelity in general compared to men (Sagarin & Guadagno, 2004). It states that due to female fertilisation, males are threatened by a reduction in reproductive success and females are threatened by resource withdrawal (Levy, Kelly, & Jack, 2006; Walum et al., 2013).
Bloom, P., Santos, L. R., & Egan, L. C. (2007). The origins of cognitive dissonance. Psychological Science, 18(11), 978-983.
A man has been married to his wife for seven years. The couple has two beautiful children, a fabulous home, and appear to have the perfect marriage. After the husband leaves work one afternoon, he decides to stop in at the local bar. The man sits at a table in the corner of the room. Not long after his arrival, a woman approaches him. She asks the man if she can join him at his table. The two seem to have quite a bit in common and enjoy each other’s company. The woman asks if he would like to go back to her apartment. He has not had a fight with his wife today. In fact, she surprised him with a love note in his briefcase. Their sex life is enjoyable, frequent, and without complaint. The couple is not currently having financial problems. Despite this, why did the man decide to leave with a stranger and cheat on his wife? A great deal of research has been carried out on the topic of infidelity. Marital therapists have reported that more than half of the couples they counsel are in therapy as a result of infidelity (Atkins, Jacobson citation). Therapists also consider an extramarital affair as, “one of the most damaging relationship events and one of the most difficult problems to treat in couples therapy” (whisman predicting sexual infidelity…). Some therapists estimate that 50% to 65% of couples seek help after an incident of infidelity in their relationship (Atkins, Jacobson & Baucom). Identifying the reasons for this problem are essential to the success of its reduction. Infidelity is not a new phenomenon. However, there was little research on the topic until the late 1970’s (Drigotas & Barta, 2001). Numerous factors have been examined while trying to determine the root cause for extramarital relationships a...
jealousy as an excuse for beating their wives; violence became a way for husbands to
Infidelity is depicted as an extremely negative thing in the United States, and is often blamed for trust issues, psychologically damaging the spouse and their children, tearing apart marriages and families and more. People who commit adultery are often shamed and told how wrong what they did is and what a terrible person they are for doing it. According to the Journal of Martial and Family by the Associated Press, however, 41% of “marriages where one or both spouses admit to infidelity, either physical or emotional.” Clearly, while infidelity is generally viewed negative by society, many people either decide that it is not as negative as it is portrayed, or do not care and do it anyway. “The Lady with the Pet Dog” and “The Storm” both go against the typical view of adultery being a negative thing in a relationship by showing that it can actually have a beneficial outcome and leave some, if not all people happier.
“Forgiveness or breakup: Sex differences in responses to a partner’s infidelity” is a study that was conducted by Todd K. Shackelford from Florida Atlantic University in Davie, David M. Buss from the University of Texas at Austin, and Kevin Bennett from the University of New Mexico in Albuquerque. The purpose of this research was to test the sex differences in response to two different types of infidelity (emotional and sexual). Forgiveness and breakup were the two separate responses to infidelity that this study
The research aims to test whether the infidelity idea is an organized pattern and whether non-experts’ conceptualizations of infidelity are consistent with researchers’ presentation of the subject. The purpose is to conclude which are the features of infidelity alleged as central and which are considered peripheral in the subject´s concept. Crossways studies´ results indicated that infidelity is organized in accordance by how some individuals´ process the information through some memory tasks and narratives describing their experiences on the subject. Also, authors Blow et al, 2005 have notice mainly three forms of infidelity: emotive only, sexual, and composite, which means both of them. One-night- stands and Internet types against work relationships
Basset, Jonathan F. "Sex differences in Jealousy in Response to Partner's Imagined Sexual or Emotional Infidelity with a Same or Different Race Other." North American Journal of Psychology. Vol. 7 Issue 1, 2005: 71-84 Brown, Pansy. "Anger and Jealousy Are Destructive." The Nassau Guardian. 28 Mar 2003. Frank, Monica. "What to do When Your Jealousy Threatens to Destroy Your Marriage." Behavioral Consultants Newsletter. 2000
The Microsoft Encarta dictionary defines greed as "an overwhelming desire to have more of something such as money than is actually needed." This definition cannot be argued with for it is plain and simple, giving the essence of the word. But to millions, perhaps billions of people, greed is something else. Some people portray greed as being qualities of the evil, selfish, and corrupt. Although these viewpoints may be partially true, greed cannot be condemned as solely being an escapee of Pandora's Box. Let us agree that greed is pursuing actions guided by rational self-interest. This means that anything outside food and water acquired at the cost of anyone else, no matter little they are affected can be defined as greed. Greed is a driving force of the world's wellbeing; all attempts to eliminate greed from humanity have ended up as disasters. Nearly all inventions of today and days past are the offspring of greedy people. Most jobs and societies are created because of greed since it is a motivator and pushes people to try and do their best. It is greed that encourages the consumer to purchase the best product at the cheapest price, thus creating market forces that help in eliminating inefficiency and waste. Greed is an asset to humanity, a tool that some are able to embrace and prosper by better than others.
Cheating in relationships happen to both men and women, and for many varied reasons. The reasons of cheating on someone may however, change based off the person’s gender. To simply state, the reason a man cheats may be different than the reason a woman cheats in a relationship. There have been facts and as well as myths surrounding the topic of infidelity. Also, one person may have a different view on what is cheating, where on the other hand, another person may think cheating is the complete opposite. With this, there is not a full and official definition of cheating in a relationship, so this can make it difficult to actually know what exactly is or what is not cheating. I have been told what is cheating by one person, and later on would
Greed Greed is a selfish desire for more than one needs or deserves. Greed can make honest men murderers. It has made countries with rich valuable resources into the poorest countries in the world. We are taught it is bad and not to practice it. But consider a world without greed, where everyone is as sharing as Mother Theresa was. The progress of humankind would be at a standstill. Greed has given our society faster travel, better service, more convenience, and most importantly, progress. Greed has created thousands of billionaires and millions of millionaires. But why is greed associated with evil? In their day, most capitalists like Cornelius Vanderbilt and John D. Rockefeller were depicted as pure evil. Vanderbilt stole from the poor. Rockefeller was a snake. But the name-calling did not come from the consumers; it was the competing businesses that complained. The newspapers expanded on these comments, calling them "robber barons." These are inaccurate terms for these businessmen. They were not barons because they all started penniless and they were not robbers because they did not take it from anyone else. Vanderbilt got rich by making travel and shipping faster, cheaper, and more luxurious. He built bigger, faster, and more efficient ships. He served food on his ships, which the customers liked and he lowered his costs. He lowered the New York to Hartford fare from $8 to $1. Rockefeller made his fortunes selling oil. He also lowered his costs, making fuel affordable for the working-class people. The working-class people, who use to go to bed after sunset, could now afford fuel for their lanterns. The people, who worked an average 10-12 hours a day, could now have a private and social life. The consumers were happy, the workers were happy, and they were happy. Bill Gates, CEO of Microsoft Corporation is another example of a greedy person. He is the richest man in the world with about $40 billion and he continues to pursue more wealth. Just because he has $40 billion does not mean the rest of the world lost $40 billion, he created more wealth for the rest of the world. His software created new ways of saving time and money and created thousands of new jobs. Bill Gates got rich by persuading people to buy his product. His motive may have been greed, but to achieve that, he had to give us what we wanted.