It Has Been Two Years

 I was destined to succeed and I do so effortlessly and easily.  I release any doubt and fear about my potential to achieve success.  I appreciate myself often.  I accept my unlimited wealth and abundance.  All my goals help me achieve greater abundance and happiness.

There can never or will ever be another person who I admire like you or who has reached the depths of my heart like you have. I would have told you that I'm so very proud of how far you've come and of all the things you have accomplished. But how could I find the words or actions to explain to you just how much I love you? It would have taken a million lifetimes to comprehend my feelings. I would have told you that you took my breath away the first time I saw you.

I don't think I could have made it through as strong as I did if it weren't for you. Anthony, I thank you for all the fun times we have spent together even if they were short lived. Over the years I have come to the conclusion that you must have been an angel sent by God to help me grieve and become a strong willed woman because no one has ever been able to help me see the light like you could. Clouds of darkness shadowed over me no matter what anyone else would say, but you made me smile with just your presence. You didn't have to say a word; everything was okay when you were beside me.

Walking Disappointment Have you ever felt like a disappointment? No matter how hard you try or how successful you are, at the end of the day you’re still a disappointment. If your answer is yes then welcome to my life, if your answer is no, let you tell you, my friend, you’re blessed. Spending my whole childhood in Serbia was a blessing. Growing up was simple; I had all the friends in the world, I went on adventures kids could only dream of and I wasn’t tied to a screen like many adolescences are nowadays.

Another big part of my life tha... ... middle of paper ... ...king back, I can say how thankful I am to those friends and what they have taught me. We did some pretty crazy things all the while maintaining the standards we had all been raised with all of our lives. It actually is possible to have fun without using drugs or alcohol. This has been a concept that has been hard to try to explain to people. It’s nice to know that the only thing you’ll have the next morning is the memory of a wonderful, guilt-free night.

It’s a battle; don’t stop fighting. I began to no longer feel misery within myself and then one day something struck me. I couldn’t stop smiling and laughing and smiling and laughing and smiling and laughing because I finally felt pure happiness. the feeling was Sweeter than fruit, stronger than Hercules. For the first time in a what seemed like forever I finally loved myself.

It made me want to strive to for better, because I wanted to make sure I can take care of him for the rest of my life. That day made me realize what love really meant. I wasn’t confused about what love was I was just so unsure if I could love someone, because growing up I never had love nor did I know how to give it in return. I was made the happiest woman on earth and I don’t sat that just to say it. I say that because the joy I felt that day I have never in life had nothing that even came close to making me like that.

It made me want to strive to for better, because I wanted to make sure I can take care of him for the rest of my life. That day made me realize what love really meant. I wasn’t confused about what love was I was just so unsure if I could love someone, because growing up I never had love nor did I know how to give it in return. I was made the happiest woman on earth and I don’t sat that just to say it. I say that because the joy I felt that day I have never in life had nothing that even came close to making me like that.

I think that my life has changed for the good because of this incident. I’m glad that I have used this negative incident to better my life and to change the fate of my future. As I stated before, there are many things that have changed in the past few months. I think this biggest thing that has changed is my feelings towards myself. I have always been pretty confident in my abilities, and myself but I never really had the motivation to do the things that I knew I was capable of.

Every day I lived I was blessed. I was so lucky to even be a live, which scares me the most. If Mathew wasn’t the man he was I would of died that day and I wouldn’t of been able to tell my story.