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Concept of communication styles
Differences in communication
Reflection of Communication styles
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My focus is close relationships, more specifically, communicating better and more effectively with my husband. We are more alike than we are different in personality and day to day life, but when disagreements occur our communication styles are opposite. Ordinarily, I need time to cool and process what has made me angry or hurt, while he wants to immediately discuss and resolve the issue. Furthermore, I tend to instantly shut down all communication and walk away, because I do not want to say anything that I will regret and I need time to reflect on my thoughts and feelings. Consequently, after I walk away he becomes insecure and feels like me needing a break is a disconnect to the relationship or emotion and has feelings of abandonment. …show more content…
Additionally, the next time an argument occurs, I stay in the conversation and calmly reassure him that I value his input and that I do want to discuss his thoughts on the matter and reinforce that I am committed to resolving the issue. While this concept may not work the first time I put it into action, over time if I am consistent and reassure him of my commitment to resolution I could change the attitudes and behaviors to buy me more time to process my thoughts and feelings without saying something to fuel an argument further.
Using the Cognitive Dissonance approach to improve communication during times of disagreements can be effective by taking time to understand his approach when we are not in a heated argument and be more understanding of his position on why he thinks it is more effective, so that I can apply this application when things do get heated. Furthermore, by my gesture of staying in the conversation when we are fighting and reassuring him that I am committed to resolve, I can help diffuse the feeling of abandonment and disconnection that he feels I have when I just walk
Harrington & Braithwaite suggest as cited by West & Turner “It is through communication practices that people achieve dialectical unity, or the way in which people are able to make contradictions feel complete and satisfactory.” (West & Turner, 2010, p.201) What I perceive to be may be something different, however, once someone shows me who they really are; I can only believe what I see. No matter what, I choose to have in my relationship it has to be simultaneously in nature. If I decide to have behavior control this can still lead to contradictions in my relationship even though, I may change that does not mean that the other person in the relationship will. My boyfriend’s views of the relationship seem to be quite different than
Cults are a small group of people having religious beliefs or practices regarded by others as strange or sinister.A tremendous population increase of cults occurred between the 1960s and 1970s, because this time period was of rebellion and reform. People felt inspired by questioning authority. People mainly join cults because they are looking for a place to fit new and something to belong to. Cults use psychological techniques to create their cults as seen in Jonestown and the Klu Klux Klan .
It is a very different motivation from what psychologists are used to dealing with but, as we shall see, nonetheless powerful” (p. 3). A few different factors determine the amount of dissonance individuals experience, including the degree to which one’s belief systems deviate from the regularity. Different cognitions, or types of knowledge, determine the overall strength of dissonance, for instance cognitions, which are connected to personal beliefs and the self, tend to result in stronger dissonance. Furthermore, the relation between dissonance and consonance could also play a role in the degree of strength of dissonance: the greater the dissonance, the more pressure there is to reduce it and reach consonance. When cognitive dissonance occurs, it often results in a conflict between a “person’s two beliefs or a belief and an action” (Festinger 1957, p.), and it is influential to individuals’ actions and behaviors. When a conflict arises, there are different steps individuals take to reduce the consequent dissonance. Festinger suggest three key strategies to minimize cognitive dissonance: (i) changing a behavioral cognitive element, or the focus is put on more supportive cognitive elements that outweigh the dissonant behavior; (ii) changing the environmental cognitive element, or the importance of the conflicting belief is reduced, and (iii) adding new cognitive elements, or the conflicting belief is changed in order to be consistent with other
American social psychologist and original developer of the theory of Cognitive Dissonance Leon Festinger breaks down his theory into two main parts. First, the presence of dissonance, inconsistency or unpleasantness, will psychologically motivate a person to achieve consonance, consistency or pleasantness (Festinger 3). Psychologist Elliot Aronson, key researcher in the 20th century of this theory, expands on the definition of dissonance to be more straightforward. Dissonance occurs when a person holds two ideas, beliefs, or opinions at the same time that are contradictory with one and other. Part two of the theory states that a person will attempt to avoid situations or knowledge that would possibly or pro...
Cognitive dissonance theory is the theory that we act to reduce the discomfort we feel when two of our thoughts are inconsistent. There are three methods that dissonance can be condensed. Individuals can modify one or more of the beliefs, attitude, behaviors, and more, this way the connection between the two elements are in agreement with one another. Another method is to gather new information that will compensate the dissonant beliefs. The third method is to decrease the importance of the beliefs, attitudes, behavior, and etc. Dissonance theory does not say that these methods will work; only people in the state of cognitive dissonance will use these methods to condense the degree of their dissonance. Cognitive dissonance theory
Cognitive dissonance is a communication theory mostly used in the field of social psychology in providing a theoretical framework in dealing with various issues relating to psychology. The title provides us with the concept that cognitive is thinking while dissonance is the inconsistency or conflict brought about. Cognitive dissonance manifests when one holds two or more incompatible beliefs simultaneously. This theory has been used and applied in several disciplines including communication, due to its simplicity and straightforwardness. The theory is commonly applied in these dynamic fields since it replaces previous conditioning or reinforcement theories by viewing individuals as more purposeful decision makers striving to acquire a balance in their beliefs. Cognitions are chunks or bits of knowledge which can pertain to any variety of values, emotions or values. These cognations can be related to one another or they can also be completely independent from each other (Cooper, 06). For instance, one may like to eat junk food, but may also be trying to lose weight. The two cognitions are related to each other in tha...
It is vital that individual differences are ironed out through open discussion by identifying and accommodating them in a mutually exclusive interpersonal communication. Personal communication is the foundation of resolving individual differences, which go a long way to produce harmony, respect and love into the relationship. The exchange of information, feelings, and meaning through verbal and non-verbal messages appreciate make marriage last till eternity.
lected Theory: Cognitive Dissonance is an objective communication theory created by Leon Festinger, a Stanford University social psychologist. Cognitive Dissonance is a conflicting mental state caused by discrepancy between two beliefs held by an individual. The more important the belief the stronger the dissonance. The strain caused by dissonance leads us to change our behavior or belief. Festinger says there are three different ways to reduce or avoid dissonance: selective exposure, postdecision dissonance, and minimal justification. Also, Festinger describes three different reasons for why one reduces dissonance. These reasons are self- consistency, personal responsibility for bad outcomes, and self- affirmation to dissipate dissonance.
...st thing that comes into your head, think carefully about what you want to say. Think about what's behind your anger. Say you value your freedom, but your significant other wants more closeness. If he or she starts complaining, don't retaliate by painting you partner as a jailer. It's natural to get defensive when you're criticized, but don't fight back. Instead, listen to what's beneath the words. Perhaps the real message is that your partner feels neglected and unloved. It may take patient questioning, but don't let anger spin things out of control. Imam Ahmad recorded that Prophet Muhammad also advised that “If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent.” If a person is trying to be silent, it will obviously restrict his ability to fight or utter obscenities and harsh words. In another tradition Prophet Muhammad offered a sequence of actions to defuse anger.
If the conflicts happen every day of the week, that’s when you want to take notice of it because it does not create a healthy environment. Conflicts that get built up over time and when they are not addressed, they can create a disaster when another conflict arises. These triggers can create larger and more in depth conflicts when an argument arises. Don’t sweat the small issues. Put the small issues aside and don’t worry about them because chances are they will not make an impact. If you do choose to react however, make sure that the reaction is in a calm matter. Address to your significant other why you feel a certain way and make sure to make use of I-messages. For example, “I feel upset when you can’t put you phone down and talk to me.” This can be a very useful tactic because you are not getting angry at them or directly telling them what they did wrong in a mean
“Conflict is a problematic situation that occurs between interdependent people who seek different goals or means to those goals (Cahn & Abigail, 2014).” Perceived differences can affect the relationship adversely if not addressed and is one of the characteristics of conflict. A sense of urgency about the need to resolve the differences are is another characteristics of conflict. While conflict occurs in many places – the workplace, between friends, parents and children, etc., one of the most difficult areas for conflict to occur is in a romantic relationship. Not resolving the conflict can cause resentment and a dampening of the feelings towards one another, and the urgency to resolve the differences is palpable.
But, remember that verbal communication is not the only form of communication. Your nonverbal communication can say a lot to the receiver (i.e. body language. Use supportive messages rather than defensive ones to be more productive. Any conflict can be resolved through correct and effective communication.
Conflict is unavoidable and connected to a world where different ideas and opinions are challenged. Negative conflict occurs when voices are not expressed appropriately, discussions are not in control or different parties reject moving forward with a solution. There is difficulty resolving disagreements because there are multiple reactions to disputes. However, a positive conflict supports debates without a destructive outcome. They improve communication, introduce principles that are important to others, and reduce chaos. On the other hand, the approach that a person uses to address conflict dictates the outcome they receive. Methods for resolving conflict include avoiding the problem, smoothing out a situation, competing against the ideas
It is very important to try and keep a civil tone because many times how you voice things may lead to different reactions. Yelling and screaming at people will not always help get your point across. Many times it makes things worse because it becomes hard to listen and understand what you are trying to explain. Getting into heated arguments with one’s spouse or partner is very common. I understand because I have been in plenty arguments with my boyfriend. Usually it leads to us yelling at one another in which leads to nothing. In the end we never solve the problem and end up more frustrated with one another. In this lesson I learned that talking in a civil tone actually makes the conversation smoother. It allows both of us get our message across so we can have a productive
Being married for five years, l has seen that effective communication is a requirement for effective problem in an intimate relationship. How we communicate is the problem more often than what we communicate. I...