A common quality many people seek in most relationships regardless of the circumstance is loyalty. It remains an essential quality required to provide a healthy relationship between two or more people. Maintaining the characteristics of trust, empathy, and understanding builds strong and effective relationships between romantic partners, professional colleagues, and friends. Often guilt, societal pressures, and self accountability pressure people into surpassing rational levels of loyalty. I believe that striving for loyalty in relationships coincides with a strong trust with partners; however, exceeding healthy amounts of loyalty is flawed. To begin, I personally have experienced multiple situations in which my own loyalty leads me to a fault. Whether it be friendly or romantic relationships, I have always found myself giving more to others than receiving, guiding me to a point of self-vacancy. Previously, I have disregarded my emptiness in regards to maintain being loyal. Despite the common misconception that loyalty secures a relationship, …show more content…
Nevertheless, the essence of being loyal can be corrupted by defense mechanisms to protect another person. Under certain circumstances within a relationship, spouses may lie to defend the ones who have hurt them and continuously provide excuses for the other person's behavior. Being loyal in a relationship can help prolong the relationship, provide freedom, and encourage faithful tendencies. These qualities of loyalty build the relationship, however, maintaining extreme devotion to one person can become self-destructive. Attempting to protect another person can lead to a guilt filled path. Although tempting, defending people whom you love can lead to a guilt stricken lifestyle. All people have faults and it is important to accept them and the consequences that come along with them rather than putting up a front to preserve
Canevello, A., & Crocker, J. (2010). Creating good relationships: Responsiveness, relationship quality, and interpersonal goals. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 99(1), 78-106.doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/a0018186
Loyalty is like glue, since it keeps the camaraderie in a relationship intact. If someone breaks the loyalty, then that trust and camaraderie are damaged as well. But yet, one can remain loyal without sacrificing one’s needs or desires. Examples of this have often appeared in modern day literature. For example, take the Tillerman siblings from Cynthia Voigt’s novel, “Homecoming.” In this novel, the oldest sibling, Dicey, has to take care of her three younger siblings after their mother deserted them in a mall parking lot. In addition, Dicey has to lead her siblings to her aunt’s home in Bridgeport, Connecticut, which is well over 60 miles away. At the beginning of the book, I believed that Dicey had to sacrifice everything she loved to keep her siblings close and together. But, as the novel goes on, you see that Dicey did not have to give up as much, since the one thing Dicey treasured the most was her family. Sure, they did make her mad and annoyed at times, but she loved them, and all she wanted was to keep them safe. Her love is what made her so allegiant toward getting to Aunt Cilla’s home. A similar situation applied for the siblings. Sammy, the youngest child, was a real, “mama’s boy.” You can tell that when their mother left them, he was the child that was in denial for a while. “Go on, because nobody cares about me except Momma, and Momma will come find me but she won’t find you, so you ahead (Pg 41).” But eventually Sammy finally admitted that Momma was gone, and that made his loyalty to Dicey even stronger. He fished, cared, and even stole so his family would be safe. In this example, loyalty kept the Tillerman siblings close together. But, even in a more futuristic, fictional story, this concept exists.
In the book, The Betrayal Bond: Breaking Free of Exploitive Relationships, author Patrick Carnes presents an in- depth study of relationships that are exploitative and can create trauma bonds. Dr. Carnes explores why these relationships form, who is more susceptible, and how bonds become so powerful. In the text he explains how to identify that traumatic bonding is occurring and he provides ways to examine these relationships. Dr. Carnes then provides specific steps to disentangle from these relationships.
In the science fiction novel Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury introduces the universal theme of loyalty and continues to emphasize the pros and cons of what Relationships and pacts are simultaneously broken and developed throughout the novel; Montag experiences these interactions with static characters: Mildred, Faber, and Beatty. Mildred ultimately betrays Montag when she is afraid of his commitment in books; he attempts to openly spark a passion in their relationship. Faber, once afraid of fireman, befriends Montag because he feels it is the “right” thing to do; he follows Montag to the brink of danger, believing in what is correct. Beatty was considered “a [my] friend” and ultimately pursues to arrest Montag for defying the strictly enforced laws. Loyalty is defined by the breakable bond held by individuals; Montag experiences this natural humane connection as the novel progresses. Ray Bradbury expresses loyalty throughout the novel through the affiliations with Mildred, Faber, and Beatty.
... friendship, but brings forth a new meaning to devotion, fidelity, and the needs of emotional endurance.
While people contain different attachment styles, their practice of either negative or positive maintenance behaviors originate from. However, depending on the utilization of these behaviors can determine the satisfaction within the romantic relationship. As the study demonstrates, the more negative maintenance behaviors are practiced the more likely dissatisfaction is to occur in the relationship. These behaviors though depend heavily, though, on the perception an individual has of themselves, but also others. Simply, when positive outlooks of the self as well as other is a practiced mindset, then the more comfortable an individual will be performing positive social skills in maintaining relationships. Thus, making a connection between attachment style and relational maintenance behaviors. As Bolkan and Goodboy, state attachment is a vital framework for conceptualizing how romantic partners maintain their relationships (329). It was found from the results of this study, individuals with a secure attachment style are less likely to practice negative maintenance behaviors. Conversely, dismissive and fearful-avoidant individuals display more negative maintenance behaviors through the representation of jealousy, avoidance, infidelity and not allowing control of the partner in the relationship. However, these results
The fundamental ability to form relationships with attachment involved, is truly indispensable in terms of forming and having proper human social relationships. One emotion that is extremely important to have in order to take part of these important types of relationships include: trust. Trust is extremely important for various reasons. It is “truly indispensable” in friendship, love, families and organizations. Trust- which pervades human societies, plays a key role in important endeavors in various dimensions of life; these dimensions include economic exchange as well as certain parts of politics. The need for trust in these examples along with others are crucial for various reasons; which include the issues that come with exhibiting lack of trust in particular situations. For example: in absence of trust among trading partners, market transaction will be much more likely to breakdown. In the absence of trust in a country’s institution and leader relationships, political legitimacy is also much more likely to break down. (Kosfeld, 2005) Research has indicated that trust plays a major roll in economic, political, and social types of success.
Loyalty can be expressed in many ways whether it be by doing anything for someone else or just being very trustworthy person overall.
Throughout human history, betrayal has been considered amongst the very worst offenses one could commit against another. Betrayal of another person is an despicable act of disloyalty and leads to broken trust. Betrayal, at its very core, is when one person in a relationship acts in such a way that favors their own interests at the expense of the other person. Betrayal sends a clear signal about how seldom the betrayer values their relationship with the betrayed. In modern society, cheating, lying, and self interest, are commonplace. One must do whatever it takes to get ahead, disregarding whomever they hurt along the way. In a world where many are reluctant to trust one another, it seems as if the only people one
Men tend to be more jealous of physical infidelity and women more jealous of emotional fidelity. In evolutionary terms this is caused by a man's need to be sure he is the father of the female's offspring, and a female's need to be sure that her dietary needs will be met during and after pregnancy (Harris 7). Due to these differences, jealousy needs to be addressed differently in each case. Since jealousy can be a major source of conflict in any partnership and "is destructive in even its smallest form…and can interfere with and destr...
Mikulincer, M., Shaver, P. R., Bar-On, N., & Ein-Dor, T. (2010). The pushes and pulls of close relationships: Attachment insecurities and relational ambivalence. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 98(3), 450-468. doi:10.1037/a0017366
Loyalty is a concept much praised by the world today. To most, loyalty is staying by one’s side through everything, or keeping a secret no matter its content. But loyalty is not always a good aspect of one's character. One should stay loyal in certain situations, but always know the boundaries of loyalty in other situations. Though loyalty can hold a friendship or relationship together, it can also cause people to be loyal to the wrong idea or person.
more you rely on their integrity. The more trustworthy the person, the more integrity they have. Honesty
All of my friends and family members trust me with their secrets, with any type of work and always know that I'am telling the truth. Even my teachers in Junior High trust me, because they know that I am a loyal person. Loyalty is not permanent. In other words, loyalty to a person can easily fade. Being loyal also means to be kind, I'm always kind to my friends, family, and teachers, this way they start noticing that I am loyal.
Furthermore, relational transgressions are generalized to be hurtful happenings within a relationship, whether it is consequential of behaviors violating normal, regulations of a relationship or behaviors causing infidelity. According to Sandra Metts and William Cupach relational transgressions can be summed up to encapsulate inappropriate reactions, lack of sensitivity, extra relational involvement, relational threat found by deception, disregard for primary relationship, abrupt termination, broken promises, deception and abuse (pp. 246). These aversive behaviors are deemed to devalue relationships, thus causing hurt as a product of transgressions. Infidelity is perceived to the be the most wounding type of betrayal. However, this particular rule violation is a hybrid of why and what a partner is thinking and what they think their partner wants them to hear. In regards to cheating, partners will deny, excuse or justify their accounts for infidelity as means of sparing their partner’s feeling. The reasoning provide for the action may not be true, but a method used to be more palatable to the victim. Furthermore, motivations for infidelity may not be what they seem. Yet feeling the need to spare a partner’s feelings from the act of infidelity stems from society’s construction cheating equates to the highest degree of betrayal. Once again society has developed the notion infidelity is evolutionary in that betrayal just happens. People, though, are not hardwired to cheat, they exercise agency, where they have control over the decision they are make and actions they perform. Nevertheless, people have disillusioned themselves into believing they will never cheat, in regards to society’s construction that infidelity leads to relational termination, thus individuals go into