Dear Susan, I didn't realize until now just how badly I mishandled our relationship. By being apart and not talking for some time now, I have quickly learned that you were everything I ever wanted and because I was so afraid of losing you, I ended up chasing you away. It wasn't until recently that realized that instead of complaining about the time I didn't have with you, I should have cherished the time I did have. The time we had together was real and filled with affection. I was never alone when we were apart, because just as you were on my mind, I was on yours. It wasn't until now that I have realized how special it was to hear your voice even if it was just once a day, let alone several times a day. It wasn't until now that I have realized that it wasn't the late phone call for me to come over because you missed me, or to stay overnight that I miss so much. What I miss is the feeling behind the way you would stare at me and or kiss my hand while we were in the car. The way we looked into each other's eyes and spoke without saying a word. The way you trusted me with your children and I trusted you with mine. The way you wrote I love you on a steamy window or mirror only to show up time after time for me to see when we were apart. The way you signed to me that you loved me or snuck a kiss or hug in while the kids weren't watching. The way we joked that we were attached at the hip while fixing dinner or breakfast. The way we wrestled and tickled each other. Susie, I could go on and on but you know exactly what I'm saying. Yes, it's the little things I miss the most. The little things that I took for granted. The promise I made to you is a promise that I will keep forever. You will always hold a special place in my heart. Even though I'm dating here and there, I end up comparing them to you. You've set the bar very high for me and that's a good thing because I refuse to settle for less than the standard you've set. On that Wednesday (July 11th) when I returned home and found your e-mail, it was the happiest I'd been in weeks.
Do you remember the first time we met? I do as I cannot shake the memory. It was love at first sight. I’ll never forget the feeling I had. A warmth overcame my body as you stoked a fire in my heart. It was like I had spent my life drowning in the sea around me and you were that breath of fresh air as I pulled myself out. My cares and concerns melted away. I was complete. You were exactly what I had been missing in my life. My better half you completed me you made me whole. Your touch, your scent, your glistening radiance I took it all in. I felt its force enter my body working its way to the very center of my soul. It felt like a real living breathing thing coalescing within my life force touching parts of me I never knew existed. You awakened some innate primal desire and I needed you at all times.
...very touching with a lot of strong emotion behind the words "I share with you the agony of your grief... the strength of caring, the warmth of one who seeks to understand the silent storm swept barrenness of so great a loss.
You are the light in my life, my happiest thought in the darkest of times. I know that you’re always there for me, no matter what. I have so many wonderful memories with you in the time that we have been together. It seems that everything about you fills my heart with love, even a simple smile makes my heart beat faster. Even after a year being with you, I find myself falling more and more in love with you each time I’m with you. It’s like an endless sea; the moment I think I cannot love you anymore, you do something so warm and thoughtful, and the ocean overflows. I find it hard to put into words just how much you mean to me, because I feel as if there are not enough words in the world to say how I truly feel towards you. You have flipped my whole world upside-down, I never knew how committed and passionate I could be for
Needless to say, I was ecstatic to be with you and I still feel that being with you was an awesome experience; you helped contribute to the broadening of my horizons in several different areas and you made me feel like the luckiest guy in the world. Around the 3rd month of our relationship, it dawned on me that you and I could be together for a while and I was completely content with that, but a selfish side of me knew that especially after I went to college, I would have never gotten my chance with Sam. I took my
I know that I start things between us a lot of the time, but even you know why. You know that it took a lot for me to trust you, but now I do. I am so happy that you are still here with me, being patient, and still by my side. So many people say that I will not make it far in life, but they do not understand me, let alone know me. So many of those people do not know how hard you push me to make something of myself. In the past, I honestly believed that I would not make it anywhere, but now I know that as long as I am happy and still alive, with you by my side I am doing great and can achieve anything.
When you got sick and the doctors told me I should hold you back you taught me it was more important to feel and grow like any other child than to have me hide you under my wing. It was more important to live. And that you did. You danced so beautifully, for years. And then your greatest joy, cheerleading. You made me so proud. You have always been my greatest pride and joy. I'm not sure how I can live this life without you. Remember when you would cry and tell me you were so afraid because you didn't want me to die before you. And I would tell you I wasn't going to die. And remember me saying you couldn't die before me, so we agreed, we had to go at the same time because neither of us could live without the other.
“I told her how I had stopped off in Chicago for a day on my way East, and how a dozen people had sent their love through me. “Do they miss me?” she cried ecstatically. “The
I love you and only you and want you and only you. I could never have imagined or wished for such a blessing. When it comes to you and me being together and how lucky we are to be in love, I smile and my heart skips a beat.
With each passing moment, my heart seems to yearn for our reunion with even greater ardor, despite my prior belief that my love for you had already reached the zenith of human emotion. Over the course of our long and painful separation, I have experienced and endured more than I ever thought I would within the vicinity of my time on this earth, and have been forced to drastically revise my interpretations of both pure bliss and anguish.
In November, I will show you my true self and show you all that is in my heart, that I can only vaguely describe to you. You captured my heart fully this year and I'm glad it was you that did it. This is just the beginning of our lifelong journey together. My first path is southwest to be with you. The words of this letter cannot fully describe how I feel about you but they are the words and the small voice of my heart. You are a one of a kind woman and I want you to know that. I cannot wait to finally have you in my arms again and declare you safe from world's harm. I cannot wait to feel your soft lips against mine. I cannot wait to feel your heartbeat. I cannot wait to look into your bright, beautiful green eyes and tell you I love you. I cannot wait to run my fingers through your long, flowing blonde hair to ease your worries.
I can surely say that I won't be able to forget about our love story. You were the most beautiful thing that could ever happen in my life. The most tender feeling I have ever endured. Having you in my life and having the opportunity to meet you brought warmth, love, and passion to my heart and soul. The fact that we decide to go separate ways has filled my heart with coldness, sadness and fear, not knowing if you would ever come back to me and perhaps you would forget me bring tears to my eyes.
When time jumped like lighting, so did we, not to our feet but towards each other. We held one another even tighter and didn't want to let go. Although, time was spent wisely and carefully saved, we had run out and were rushed like an ambulance to meet the schedule appointed in half an hour. In sweet bitterness, we packed up and went home. An everlasting day at Lake Lavon that is perpetual in my heart will remain there forever.
When I got to know you better a year later I realized I wasn't alone and that something inside of you was what constantly brought tears to my own eyes. I went through a time in my life where I felt worthless and unloved and I continuously searched for happiness. I wasn't getting along with my family, and my friends were all hating each other, leaving me in the middle, stressfully trying to pull things together. You made me laugh and forget everything that was going on. That year you became my escape, my survival. I don't think I could have made it through as strong as I did if it weren't for you.
was the sole barrier between us, I said to myself ‘I’ll have her in my arms again!
I wonder what happened between the two of us? Did I not satisfy her? Did she become bored with me? Or worse yet, did I make her angry? Actually, upon reflection, I don’t think it was any of those things. I think she just grew up. As she got older, she would come to me less and less. She outgrew me and all that I could give her. ...