I Did it All for the Nookie- Personal Narrative

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I Did it All for the Nookie- Personal Narrative

I was as drunk as I possibly could be. My body felt as if I was a wounded penguin trying to fly, but penguins can’t fly. I was at my best friends keg party on New Years Eve of 1999. Everybody was dancing, bonging some beer and getting as wild as a bunch of chickens with their heads chopped off. I don’t know if it was my “beer goggles” that I had on that night or what, but all the girls were looking damn good, even Mrs. Richardson, my friend’s mom. There was one girl at the party I was looking for and that was my best buddy’s girlfriend. Ever since I laid eyes on her chest, I was madly in love. She was also very pretty, don’t get me wrong. At first I was just going to try to take her from my friend to get revenge. See, he did the same thing to me awhile back with my girlfriend. He thought I had no clue what was going on when he and my girlfriend walked into his bedroom. Boy was he wrong. I remember everything buddy.

As I staggered my drunken self around searching for this one specific girl in which I was secretly in love with. I heard my name calling from where the keg was located. I slowly turned around and noticed a blurry, blonde-haired creature waving at me and calling me to go over there. At first I thought the mysterious figure came out to be a talking lion with the blonde hair and all. Once again I carried my intoxicated ass in that direction. As I became closer to the blurred object, I noticed it was she. After all the alcohol I consumed, it made it hard to see straight. She said that she was bored and that nobody at the party was talking to her. We were talking for about fifteen minutes and then I asked her if she wanted a beer. She said that she didn’t drink. I thought maybe if she drank, I would start to look a little more sexy to her. I had to get her drunk. Her boyfriend had no clue that I was in the process of “working my game” with her.

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