If you lack differentiation of self, making decisions and doing things on your own is hard or too complicated and leading you to always depend on someone. The second concept that is important to me is also how he describes Family projection process. Basically is it a transmission experience; when parents react and respond differently to each child, depending on circumstances and situations that they are in. For example, the son will most likely get more punished and the daughter may have more restrictions. In my personal experience I was the oldest out of my brothers so I was expected not to yell at my brothers, most cases I would get yelled at for yelling at them.
This seemed to be the case with Kipland Kinkel, Kip didn't live up the standards his parents had set for him. They expected him to be like his sister, but having a learning disability made it nearly impossible to be everything his parents wanted him to be. (The Killer, video) His parents sought a variety of solutions. One of the many solutions was that his parents kept Kip back in first grade. Kip then stumbled through the third grade where he would study for spelling test, but not pass them.
One thing I think can help detriangulate this relationship is to support each other equally. My parents are very supportive of my brother and I. However, they aren’t supportive of each other. I believe this will strengthen their relationship dramatically. Colton’s Family Colton’s family has a lot of triangles.
My parents ' parenting style is Authoritarian because they use control and fear to expect their children to follow their set of strict rules without reasoning or effective communication and if not done so, would be yelled and beaten. The parenting style did not consists of listening to child 's point of view, expressing any affection, or empathy towards the child. We were just expected to respect, not talk back, not look into elder 's eyes, and to do exactly what were told. Problems that a child face due to Authoritarian parenting, accurately impacted me throughout childhood just as the research predicted. The lack of effective emotional bonding that express of being open-minded, sharing, and understanding child 's needs and feelings, put
The only thing that they would have an issue with was if I brought home an “F.” I can’t say that was a bad way of parenting, but the fact that they didn’t push me hard enough to want to make an “A” wasn’t good either. I always wondered what life would be like if I had parents that constantly were on my back about grades, and just my school work in general. My parents methods for raising me helped me to find that inner motivation that always got me get through every obstacle I faced. I believe when you go as far as removing all barriers from your child’s path, it enables them to grow mentally and develo... ... middle of paper ... ...ous day. I was confused because I received the same grade, but unlike them I was excited about my “B.” I considered the fact that my parents only cared if I brought home a failing grade, which was probably why our reactions were totally different.
Education needs to become the first priority for students, teachers, and parents. Teachers should not be afraid to fail and student that did not show significant growth within his or her class. Parents should not intervene when a teacher does fail a child because of embarrassment or pride. And lastly, students must make education the most important part of his or her life. Learning needs to come before fun which, unfortunately, seems like a foreign concept to most youths today.
Expectations Growing up I thought that the only way to make my parents happy and to notice me was to follow the expectations they had for my older brother. I thought their expectations were supposed to be my goals, but as I got older I started to realize that meeting their expectation wasn't good for me. I wasn't supposed to just have goals to make them happy. I was supposed to have goals that I wanted, goals that were supposed to benefit me. After reading "Only Daughter" by Sandra Cisneros it helped me confirm this feelings I was having.
He did something no other teacher did, give him a chance. School was not Kevin’s favorite, but McCourt did not write him off as a bad student right away, he gave him a chance which is something every teacher should do for every student. Finally, the fact that McCourt “suggested she go to college” (McCourt 109) even though the student went to a vocational and technical high school speaks volumes. Granted the school is preparing her for life after and giving her the opportunity to get a job right away. He is pushing his students to go above and beyond what is typically expected of them, which is something all teacher should do regardless of where or who they teach.
I now wish that I would have listened to the adults in my life that advised me to make better choices in this situation because I look back and realize that I was not with someone who respected me, cared about me, or wanted what was best for me. At the time, I chose to be blind to this and accept being treated poorly. This relationship ultimately lowered my self-esteem and made me feel very insecure. I was extremely influenced by my peers during adolescence, but not all of the influence was negative. I had many friends that I feel helped develop me into the person I am today with a genuine heart, a desire to
While many do not choose to be put in difficult situations, my parents chose to enter a difficult situation with the hopes that the outcome would not only benefit them, but their children as well. I often hear them, and people like them, being criticized for the act of coming to a new country, leaving behind everything they knew to pursue the American Dream. In my opinion, my mother and father inhibit the value of perseverance because throughout my life they have shown the unwillingness to let the challenges placed in front of them from hindering their