From early on, I knew English would be my kryptonite. I was never interested in the subject and the books assigned along with the endless research papers made me resent the “boring” subject even more. It seemed as though many of my teachers in the past did not care for our feelings towards the material we covered or how we grew as readers and writers. We had no say in what we wanted to do or what we wanted to get out of the class. I understand that we had standards and certain things we needed to cover by the end of the year, but it would have been helpful if the teachers cared about what we wanted to learn, not only about reading and writing, but about ourselves as well.
My classes, for the most part, were not very interesting and I had lost all interest in being at school. My English class was a writing class and the only class that seemed at all appealing. The teacher, Mrs. F, seemed really nice and I thought that it could be a fun semester. We were given assignments to write about, but, for a change, the topics we were given were interesting . I was used to writing about Willy Loman, the pathetic hero, and Hester Pryne.
As a writer, I think that I am not as good as I thought I was back in high school. I see myself as a student who tries their best, but makes “B” average work. I have never really taken the time to relate to my papers. I always just wrote what the teacher wanted and handed it in. In my mind, I never really liked trying to explain in full detail what something meant.
I haven’t done a lot of writing in the past. However, the writing I have done has just been for my school. I have never liked writing so I kept writing only to what I needed to write for school. But the kinds of writing I have done are reports, autobiographies, and writing about people from history. I never wanted to do my writing assignments like I was supposed to, which didn’t help me learn how to write.
Coming in, I didn’t have very much experience writing essays on a college level. In previous years, I tried to take the easiest English class I could. I hated writing and tried to do the bare minimum to get by. I thought I wasn’t skilled enough at writing, and no one would want to read what I write. Taking Comp has helped me develop as a writer.
Be You, Everyone Else is Taken One bad experience I had with reading was in my second grade. I was brand new to the class so I did not know anyone. We had to get into groups of three and take turns reading a book. It was my turn to read and I struggled on every word on the page. I could feel myself starting to sweat because I knew the other kids were judging me.
Stepping into the class, from the first day, I was able to feel the the high expectations of my work once we were handed the scoring rubric for the writing produced in the class and I had a feeling I was unable to meet that criteria. Throughout the first two years of high school, I didn’t work much on improving my writing. Getting through the English classes were fairly easy because there was not much of a challenge for me. My teachers didn’t expect much in my assignments and homework, except completion. Therefore, I didn’t work on my own or sought for help to improve on my writing.
My junior year of high school, I preferred to sit in the middle of my AP English Language class to avoid being called on by my teacher, Mr. Johnson. Mr. Johnson was a mature, relatively little man with an advanced vocabulary and an awkward humor. I was quite intimidated by this teacher like no other teacher. I would feel intimidated to speak or to submit my work. When I first stepped into the class, I was able to feel the high expectations towards my work once we were handed the scoring rubric for the produced in this class; I had a feeling I would be unable to meet that criteria.
I was not confident in my writing and was unsure how I would get by with only one rough draft being looked over by my teacher. I felt that the professors would score me low and I would not be able to get college credit. Our teacher sensed that everyone was becoming stressed, so she took a day to review previous year’s student’s portfolios and discuss writing. Soon it felt like I could take on the task of writing and creating my portfolio. My binder began to overfill with possible evidence, I read books and took notes that I would be able to site.
Oh how I dreaded English 103 online… I stayed up late and spent days thinking and planning on my papers and watching videos ect. Sometimes as I read through the discussions I was discouraged and amazed to see such great writers, I wondered where did they learn this great skill? English class or their upbringing? I know everyone is different and learns differently and we all have our own language, way of speech but I’m as near close to skill writing as some of my class mates. It was also very discouraging to get low scores after I thought I was doing great, I reached out to my counselor and the writing center, in which they helped me a lot.