Many people like to believe that forgetting the past is the only way you’ll be successful in life. They say to dwell on you past is useless, so why not just move forward. However, this idea is flawed. To ignore the mistakes you have made in an effort to proceed in life, it's merely an illusion of moving on in life. All one would be doing would be running to the future to hide from the past.
If you are fortunate enough to have friends that care about you, after committing a mistake, they will more often than not to just forget about it, and spout some profound drivel like such as, “The past cannot be changed, the future is yet in your power.”. But these kinds of phrases are misleading. It implies that we should merely brush away our previous
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“I want to start over, turn over a new leaf to become a better person! I want to forget about my horrid past!”. This is the one excuse I find the most laughable, oxymoronic even. You want to be a better person, yet you want to completely forget what you have done? How can you become a better person by not knowing where to improve on? Sure you might say , “I will be nicer to people,” or “I will be more responsible.” or even “I will donate to charity more.”. Of course you could do all of that. But you as a person is the culmination of previous experiences and memories. To “turn over a new leaf” by forgetting about your misdeeds, your regrets, or maybe even your crimes, you cannot become a better person. You simply become irresponsible. Should a murderer repent his wrongdoings, and finally cease committing crimes, would you forget his history of manslaughter? Of course not! But, you might forgive him, and only once you forgive him can you start to realise how much better he is as a person than before. Bystanders might still think he is still the murderer that he used to be, but you know that he has become a much better person. This draws a parallel to yourself. You can never really forget about your past, and once you remember those accursed memories, you might think like the bystanders, degrading yourself because of your past actions despite knowing you have indeed become a better person. But once you confront your problems and properly reflected and repented, you will finally able to recognise yourself as the new person you are. Both might have the same blemished past, but one is now stronger than the
Moving on and being able to find happiness is very relevant in regards to The Story of Tom Brennan by J.C Burke. You can't live in the past, you have to move on, whether you find happiness is up to you. Also the more time you spend thinking about the bad things there is less room for the good thoughts. Of you can find something to look forward to or something you enjoy doing, just something to take your mind off the past will help you move on.
There is a saying that goes “don’t live in the past” because things will always get better in the future and that you should let time work itself out. People often think of their pasts and let that dictate their future, which in many cases keeps people from achieving their full potential. People become blinded by their pasts and the good memories they’ve had which turns to them seeking the same thing to satisfy themselves because they’ve become comfortable and do not want change. They may not want change because they are scared of what is to come or because of getting hurt again like they have in previous experiences. A prime example of this is Erykah Badu’s song “Bag lady” as it explains how people should let go of their pasts and look to the future.
Life as we all know is full of disappointment and filled with disparity. Most of us are able to go through these and learn from and forgive ourselves. Yet, this isn’t always the case. People are faced with traumatic experiences that often take a long time to get over, if they ever do get over it. These experiences brew in our brain popping up at the most random points often bringing our spirits down. Although these experiences may scar us and fill us with regret and guilt, we can’t continue to live in the past and let these regrets haunt us. Self forgiveness is a key to healing and to moving on in life, no matter how hard it is.
Some people may disagree with this observation. They may argue that it is easier to forget than forgive depending on the emotional circumstance. Forgiveness is interpreted different ways by many people. For example, the person that went through the crisis can forget what happened to them by staying away from that particular person or situation. However, forgiveness takes the power, or control, away from the forgiven and should be used as a tool that assists in balancing your life when someone hurts you.
In Nuremberg or National Amnesia, A quote that caught my attention was, “Those who forget the past are doomed to repeat the past” (Tutu 457). I feel the quote means that by forgetting the past you also forget the lessons you learned with that experience, which will cause you to repeat it without the knowledge you learned
Have you ever been an eyewitness at the scene of a crime? If you were, do you think that you would be able to accurately describe, in precise detail, everything that happened and remember distinct features of the suspect? Many people believe that yes they would be able to remember anything from the events that would happen and the different features of the suspect. Some people, in fact, are so sure of themselves after witnessing an event such as this that they are able to testify that what they think they saw was indeed what they saw. However, using an eyewitness as a source of evidence can be risky and is rarely 100% accurate. This can be proven by the theory of the possibility of false memory formation and the question of whether or not a memory can lie.
Kowalski, M.(1998, December). Applying the "two schools of thought" doctrine to the repressed memory controversy. The Journal of Legal Medicine. Retrieved September 14, 2000 from Lexis-Nexis database (Academic Universe) on the World Wide Web: http://www.lexis-nexis.com/universe
...onging for the past, is futile and will only result in bad events in the future, up to the point that there is no longer any future for the nostalgic individual.
The motivation and tendency of people to forgive others remains an important topic of discussion. In today’s society most people at some period have experienced feeling of un forgiveness towards friend, or relatives. “Forgiveness was defined as the ability to relinquish of resentment towards others” (Baskin & Enright, 2004, p. 80).
Apostle Paul said, “Be content with such things as you have as He has said He will never leave nor forsake you so that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper”. Be aware that the hurt you feel about the past is not in the present and no matter what happened in the past, your present memory of it is what gives life to it. So heal yourself of past pains, focus your attention on the present, the less attention you give to the past memory, the less life and power it has. Focus on your feelings right now. Memories are only thoughts and they have no power until you ponder on them, so the more you ponder on the present, the less of the past you will think about, taking your interest off those things that do not benefit you.
Everyone, at some point in their lives, has made a mistake. Sometimes we get lucky and only falter a little, making it through the problem relatively intact. Other times, we mess up a lot and have to fix what was damaged over a long period of time. However, the same is true for most, if not all cases—those who make the mistake learn from it. Often times, our failures teach us valuable lessons that we only gain because of the experience we gain after messing up.
One can not change how they have done things before, but being given a second chance opens doors to be to whoever one feels they can be. Without another chance in anything, one can not correct the ways of thinking, the outlook of the future, or the way people see them. It is a way to turn the bad into the good, make a change and leave the wrongdoing behind. There are many who only get one chance and hope and wish every day that there could be a second chance, one that they know they may never get.
The hindsight bias, as defined in the article Hindsight Bias and Developing Theories of Mind by Andrew N. Meltzoff and Geoffrey R. Loftus, occurs when “people armed with advanced knowledge of an outcome overestimate the likelihood of that particular outcome, in essence claiming that they ‘knew it all along’” (Meltzoff). People who are victims of this very common bias can be drawn to the idea of going to the past to fix all of their problems because they live in the present. Knowing what the present holds, people believe that if they went back in time, they could change the future and, in turn, have a better
...you in your past, you are not your past, you are the resources and the capabilities you glean from it. And that is the basis for all change.” In conclusion, learn from your mistakes, remember what talents got you where you are today and success will eventually come along the way.
Some reflection of the past is necessary in order to move on and make better choices. Making the same mistakes over and over...