Sibling Spats “Both of you, to your rooms, now!” This is the typical punishment that used to arise from sibling rivalry, but what are parents to do now when the fighting turns into physical violence? The usual reprimanding may not be enough to calm the raging waters. There are various suggested ways to control child behavior, but the problem is finding the appropriate method for the right family. The first step to finding a solution is locating the roots of the problems. When the children are subjected to constant socialization, they learn to share and use their siblings as a sort of “testing ground.” This time helps shape the child’s personalities and other lifelong qualities (Bode 21).
Also they may have negative thoughts of the sibling with autism (Glasberg), since they may act differently. Finally children may feel as if they are left behind especially if both parents focus lots on the autistic child (Glasberg). Since they are impacted emotionally, their actions may also change. Siblings of a child with autism are more destructive, play less with their siblings, and tend to have fewer friends (Glasberg). This may cause tensions in the household and may not be understood by the
The more extreme cases of parental differential treatment and poor sibling relationships, however, stem from more than just day-to-day family rivalries and can be a risk factor for mood disorders and psychological adjustment problems. Differential negative treatment of parents to one child negatively affects family and sibling relationships. Poor sibling relationships and differential parental treatment are an environmental risk factor for psychological adjustment and major depression throughout adolescence and adulthood. Sibling rivalry is essentially a competition between siblings and the measures to which one will go to receive attention from a parent. Though most parents will not admit to having a “favorite child,” research shows that even at an early age, children are able to pick out differences in parental treatment between oneself and his or her sibling.
They try to annoy one another for the fun of it. However, some sibling relationships can range from being comfortable to unpleasant. An adopted child whose birth mother keeps her other children may come as shocking and heartbreaking news. If a sibling is still living with their parents, the adopted child may feel like something is wrong with themselves, as the other child
The Family System The brother or sister of a child with a disability is affected in the same ways as their parents. They can exhibit the same emotional stages. They may experience negative feelings. They commonly feel deprived of parental time and attention. In order to accept their sibling, it is the parents’ attitudes and expectations that will determine the harmony, interactions, and ultimate relations of their children.
Moreover, if a child becomes aware of an affair happening in their parents’ marriage, such child is very likely to carry a great resentment toward one parent and a much stronger bond with the other. If the mother has moved onto a new spouse and the father is left grieving, the child is likely to pick sides with the father and possibly feel as if betrayal has taken place due to the mother becoming distant. The child tends to take the side of the ‘weaker’ parent; the one who has fallen into a downward spiral, the parent whom the child believes is in need of protection. Children need a basis of trust in order to form healthy relationships as they mature and reach adulthood. A skewed interpretation of the importance of trust is detrimental to a child’s future relationships.
Many times when children have divorced parents, they suffer from growing up too rapidly. The children’s main care giver, whichever parent the child lives with, must assume more responsibility upon becoming a single parent. We know that one parent assuming more responsibility can lead to a bad relationship due to lack of time spent together, but it can also prevent the child from completely acting as a child. The cooking, cleaning, and child care now falls on one parent instead of two. This results in a child with divorced parents caring for themselves.
Parents of more than one child treat their children differently. Siblings each require a unique response due to differences already present between them. As Robert Plomin states, “ It’s the experiences that siblings don’t share that matter, not the ones they do.” As far as raising kids, it’s how a parent reacts to a child’s inborn characteristics that counts. If the child’s genotype is matched to a corresponding environment, then the parent has succeeded. The child already has everything but it’s the parents’ job to bring it out.
For example going from living in a married household to living in a divorced household may cause a child to resent their parents putting a strain on the relationship between the parent and child. Both culture and lifestyle has an affect on the relationship of parent and child. The different aspects of both culture and lifestyle such as food, travel, religion, single-parent households, employment etc. can negatively or positively affect a parent child relationship. The development of families and individuals in the family affect parent child relations.
That can effect children mentally and emotionally because children try to find answers to why their parent is not dedicating as much time. When single parents are involved in new relationships they can become more focused on their new partner and put their children aside. Sometimes step-parents can be abusive towards children and even with their partner. They can be manipulative and make their partner and step-children feel that they are not good enough. That is when abuse becomes part of their life and the parent and children tend to believe whatever they are told.