Communication And Communication In The Case Of Divorce

Divorce is a concept that is all too common in today’s society. In most cases, divorce is viewed negatively, regardless of whether or not a person views it as morally right or wrong. No one truly wants a divorce in and of itself; an event or circumstance causes a divide, which results in one or both sides of the marriage wanting a permanent separation from each other. Couples should view this as an option only in cases of extremity. What becomes simply heartbreaking is when the marriage could have been saved, but instead a couple has given up because of various “differences.” Required therapy should be set in motion, by law, as a first step of precaution before filing for divorce with the only exception being in cases of severe physical abuse

It is quite absurd that a couple would decide to get a divorce based solely off of a misunderstanding that they refuse to discuss, but sadly, many couple do actually end up divorced because of a simple miscommunicated word, action, or emotion. Open and honest communication is vital in the health of any marriage. One of the biggest and most detrimental struggles in marriage is communication According to S.M. Stanley, H.J. Markman, M. St. Peters, and B.D Leber, authors of, “Strengthening Marriages and Preventing Divorce,” “Evidence from several longitudinal studies of couples suggests that communication problems are destructive martial conflict and is among the leading risk factors for future divorce and marital distress” (qtd. Gottman, 1994; Markman & Hahlweg, 1993) (Strengthening Marriages). If either spouse shuts down, it potentially could shut the entire marriage down. Concerning the overall and long lasting health of a marriage, it is crucial for couples to be open and honest with how their personal feelings and thoughts are affecting them. Unsaid feelings and thoughts do not only burden the spouse carrying them, but it also very much affects the spouse who senses the problem and is unable to fix it. However, many times an issue is not overcome because both spouses are unmotivated to do so. The authors also discuss

Couples often fail to realize going into marriage that conflict is a given. According to Kerri Barrnett, author of “Counseling Couples in Conflict,” says, “Conflict is inevitable in all relationships” (Counseling Couples). The author also concludes that if couples would process the issues that they are facing with certain characteristics of grace, justice empathy, trust, and forgiveness (Counseling Couples). Obviously there are very clear preventative steps to take when it comes to an unhealthy marriage. Couples should start realizing that divorce is not the only option to their conflicts. The expectations that most individuals have when entering a marriage will almost always never be met in the way they personally desire them to be. This, however, does not mean their spouse is unable to meet their needs; the need may be met in a different way. Couples need to not be so quick to give up and begin to realize that all it takes, sometimes, is a second