I was going crazy. I didn't know what to do with myself anymore. I was always being bugged by this feeling of urgency. The worst thing was that I knew exactly what it was for, and I hated it. That always happened when I had a crush on someone. Or more than a crush. I still didn't know how extreme my feelings were. I waited a month for something to happen. For the feeling to leave me or for Kaoru to do something to make me hate him. For him to say something about our almost-kiss. Nothing, though. He went on like it never happened, and I was distraught inside. There was just too much stress added with finally realizing my feelings. I couldn't figure out if I had rather never discovered them or not. Why wasn't he saying anything? Why couldn't I get over him? I swore it had to be the worst timing. On top of that, I heard finalists had been getting calls for the past two weeks about who had received or lost the scholarship. They were asked to keep it a secret so the surprise wouldn't be spoiled. I hadn't been called, yet. I had no idea if I was the chosen person or one of the rejects, and it only made my anxiety worse. Knowing me, I realized I was at my stress limit. One of them needed to leave, and from what I could tell, my liking Kaoru was only getting stronger since I had recognized it. I just wanted him to say something to me about it. Whether he said it was a mistake or he wished we really had kissed, I didn't care. I needed to know what he was thinking. I always have to know what's going on in someone's head, or I'll go mad. Especially on something like that. This is childish, I thought to myself as I stood outside my classroom building. I couldn't wait anymore, though. I was at my limit. I had to know, or I would ne... ... middle of paper ... ...e would have been so proud if she were there. I was going to my dream school for my dream job, and nothing would get in my way! Except, I remembered, someone already had. I had just confessed to Kaoru a few minutes ago, because I thought I hadn't won. I thought I was going to be there another year. I didn't know that was going to happen… If I had, I would have kept my mouth shut. How was he going to feel about me leaving before school had even ended? Especially since we were finally together. I felt horrible for doing that to him. It wasn't fair. I wasn't going to see him at all after I left. I slowly hung up the phone. The nosy receptionist asked, "What was that about?" I replied, walking away, "Oh, nothing important." I left the office and went all the way to the fountain, sitting on the edge. I knew there was a decision to be made. My dream or Kaoru.
And yet none of his certainties was worth one hair of a woman 's head. He wasn 't even sure he was alive, because he was living like a dead man. Whereas it looked as if I was the one who 'd come up emptyhanded. But I was sure about me, about everything, surer than he could ever be, sure of my life and sure of the death I had waiting for me. Yes, that was all I had. But at least I had as much of a hold on it as it had on me. I had been right, I was still right, I was always right. I had lived my life one way and I could just as well have lived it another. I had done this and I hadn 't done that. I hadn 't done this thing but I had done another. And so? It was as if I had waited all this time for this moment and for the first light of this dawn to be vindicated.”
During the height of the feminist movement in 1971, feminist art historian Linda Nochlin published an essay titled “Why Have There Been No Great Women Artists?” in the magazine ArtNews. In this brief polemical essay, Nochlin elaborates upon the reasons why there have been no great female equivalents for Michelangelo or Rembrandt and explores the possibilities behind the lack of great female artists throughout the course of history of art. Unlike most feminist intellectuals in her times, she does not conduct her arguments through the typical feminist views, emotional and subjective centered, but rather through “historical analysis of the basic intellectual issues (Nochlin 145).”
....” I hear her say. I was so happy after hearing that even though my expression wasn’t the best because of the amount of pain I was going through and with my last breath I say “You have to win.” I couldn’t hear what Katniss said after that because the pain was getting worse. In my mind at the moment, I just want to get carried away by one of those hovercrafts and just leave forever. I have never; ever in my life felt pain to this extent. But my family back in district 11 must be crying and would rather strangle themselves than watch me die on their TV screen. I want to cry right now so much. I miss them; I won’t get to see them again, ever. I wish I could have spent more time with them and I will definitely miss Katniss. I wish I got to know her a lot better. This is definitely not the way I wanted to die. A loud BANG was the last thing I heard and was gone forever.
A general worldview of the United States is a country enriched in luxury, where attaining “the American Dream” is the ultimate goal. America is seen as a country that offers freedom and most importantly provides opportunities. However, behind this façade is the dilemma that exists between the rich and poor neighborhoods in the United States. The socioeconomic status of parents plays a vital role in their offsprings’ future socioeconomic status. The effects of poverty and wealth among children in neighborhoods are examined in Tama Leventhal’s and Jeanne Brooks-Gunn’s article Children and Youth in Neighborhood Context.
In regards to my academic and career goals, I plan to attend a four year university and eventually medical school. After medical school, I hope to become an orthopedic surgeon through residency and specialize in sports medicine. My interest in sports medicine has developed through experiences such as observing my father’s ACL surgery, having an operation on a broken hand, and caring for my grandfather who had prostate cancer. I hope to contribute to the world of sports medicine through research, either on treatments for knee ligament tears or supplement breakthroughs. Additionally, this past summer I spent most of my time at the University of Pittsburgh Health Career Scholars Academy, where I was able to explore various science-related health professions through lectures and gain insight on the medical field. These experiences have secured my interest for healthcare and medicine.
I have had a passion for helping people for as long as I can remember. I think that the earliest influence that I had was my dad. My dad is a very giving and sweet person. He is the kind of person to give you the shirt on his back. It always seemed like he was the happiest when he was helping others and trying to make there life easier, I saw this at a very young age and it inspired my love for helping others.
and the feeling of just being there. I found out that I did not make top five in the state. I was not
I stared down at my hands, trying to control the shaking. My breathing came out slowly, if it came out at all. I felt like bursting into tears. I stared at the boards in front of me. My head was spinning, and my mind was racing. I couldn’t believe I had missed that break.
it until I was much older. I didn’t really know how I would react to
I watched through glossy eyes as time passed and I was still not picked for any of the ten teams....
I realized that he didn’t care about me the way I wanted him to. He hurt me in so many ways. Not because of the dinner, or the waiting, but because all of highschool, all I wanted was for him to treat me like I was the greatest thing to ever happen to. I wanted him to realize all of the of the effort I put into trying to make “us” work. I wanted to be happy, and the only way I thought I could achieve that was through him Now, as I reflect on everything between that has happened between us, I know that that’s not true. I am not the same person I was at the beginning of this wild ride. I don’t regret what happened between us because as hard as it was, I am a stronger person because of it. It made me the person I am today and it has forced me to realize that the only person that I can count on to make me happy is me. This is what I
there was no grand finale or fiery crescendo. the novelty of it all had faded. he wasn't willing to slow down and commit to me, and I had grown tired of waiting. where spending time with him once excited me, now It just made me sad.
Now I sit in first hour with fingers crossed as I wait to hear the announcement: “And the winner is…” not me. My heart drops, and I feel my cheeks get hot as my classmates look over to me. I somehow manage to hold it together until I make it to my car after school where I break down. I feel bitter and angry toward my opponent for beating me and at my friends for encouraging me to run. I refuse to be involved in my school’s leadership next year.
...e,” because he didn’t want my senior year to revolve around someone I can barely see. His detachment reached the point of no response, and he ceased communication all together, saying “It was needed for us to move on until college.” To this day I still love him, and I know he still loves me. He wants the best for me, and although it is painful because I cannot hear his voice, it’s truly what I need. “I will be there at the airport the day you arrive at your future college, I love you forever and always.” These were the last words that I heard from him, harsh, yet caring. To this day I still love him, and try to move on, but no one seems to even come close to this amazing person. “Love at first sight” I once believed as a fools quote, but today I see it as the most amazing thing in the world, something that is achieved by pure chance and luck, only experienced by few.
I got really happy. It felt like all of my wishes blossomed into the fabric of reality. Other friends started asking me questions about my selection and my answer was “E”. Later, I found that the selection was not published yet and the news was just a prank. I was heart-broken by my friend’s treachery which made me look like a salt miner-undermining the truth among my