As a child I was the trouble maker. My Dad was a key part in the church that we were going to at the time. He was the youth pastor and the worship leader of Los Angeles First Church of the Nazarene. In grade school I rarely saw my Dad. He worked early hours and by the time I was home he would be sleeping or getting ready to do something at church. This is when I believe my first wall went up. My Dad was rarely around as a child and expected my mother to take care of us, which she did an amazing job of. I would always be teased about being a Momma’s boy in church. It was not my fault. My mom, sister, and aunts were the only family I had. Up into maybe 7th grade is when my father started to be apart of my life.
The wall that was put up because of my father is a wall that is nearly torn down. The little Josue behind this wall wanted his father to hug him and so affection towards him. I did not have the father figure that I was supposed to have. I remember one time after my parents had a big fight my father left the house so both of them can calm down. When my father came back for some reason I was afraid of my father. For most of my childhood I was just afraid of my father and saw him as an authoritative figure. Fortunately, like I said before this wall is nearly torn down. I understand that my father is not perfect, but I also understand that he loves me and wants the best for me. The reason I have this “father wound” is because he is imperfect. Right now my father and I have an amazing relationship. I believe the wall will never ever be torn down fully, but my father is now able to go around the wall and show Little Josue how much he loves him and Little Josue back.
The next wall that I can think of was built sometime between 1...
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...eelings and experience them. We all have wounds. For me the biggest ones are the “Father Wound” and the “Romantic Wound.” Our job is not tearing down the walls but make them accessible. If we tear them down then we are also tearing down a defense mechanism and without it anyone can come and hurt our inner child. People should understand that we have walls, nut are not always welcomed into them as well. The walls should not be intimidating, they should be just enough to protect the inner child. Just like the wall a wound cannot be taken away. People are imperfect and they hurt feelings. We have to deal with our wounds and make them apart of us. We should not cast them out but embrace them. What we see as an infirmity God sees as a strength. Once we learn to love ourselves this is when we learn to love others and this is the greatest commandment that God has given us.
I’ve never heard of any childhood quite like yours. I was shocked by the personality and character of your parents and how they raised you and your sibilings, “The Glass Castle”. I understand why people call your parents monsters. I will admit that the thought crossed my own mind on multiple occasions. However, I have also never read a book or a memoir that required so much thinking . With every page I read I was able to learn about the struggles & hardships you dealt with as a child and I tried to see a deeper meaning. When I did that, I saw your parent’s intentions behind everything they did. I began to understand what you saw and still see in your parents.
Being in the military I have came across a number of different leadership/management styles and tried to adopt some of those that I thought were effective. The values that we hold in the military are expected to be at a higher standard then our civilian counterpart. This is something that I do not take for granted and try to live by our core values. The core values in the Air Force are what guide our organization and something that I have tried to represent my whole Air Force career. “In May 1995, then-Secretary of the Air Force Sheila Widnall, and then-Chief of Staff of the Air Force, Gen. Ronald Fogleman, established the Air Force Core Values: Integrity First, Service Before Self, and Excellence in All We Do.” If you as a manager can abide by these values while supervising your people, no matter how many that would be, then morally you can feel like you did your best as a manager.
I sat across the table from my dad while he stared at me with a disbelieving look on his face. My mom sat to the right of me with tears in her eyes. She could see my pain as well as my dads, and she knew the war that was about to start between my own father and me. My brother sat to the left of me making comments that only made the situation worse. I could feel myself dying inside as my heart began to break. I had no idea how to deal with the situation that I had gotten myself into. My new boyfriend was mixed in races, and my dad was totally against it. I sat there crying while trying to make him understand, saying things like, "Dad, he's a person not a color." But, it was like talking to a brick wall. My dad was brought up with the belief that races do not mix under any circumstances. I did not realize that dating someone whom was not completely of my race would tear my dad and I apart. We had talked about it before, but I did not think he would react the way that he did. The words and fights that followed tore me apart. I went from being near perfect in my fathers eyes to being a "spoiled, selfish brat" whom supposedly only cared about myself. I could not believe those words were coming out of my dad's mouth. Things got so bad that I did everything I could to stay away from home for as long as I could. I even tried to move out. I got yelled at every time I walked through the door. I went from being great to not being able to do anything right, and it all happened over night. To make things worse, some of my friends started to look at me in different ways too. If I wasn't around, they would say things like, "I can't believe Lori is a nigger lover." Others talked about me and said what I was doing was immoral.
My father still communicated but it was never the same. I was forced to grow up without that father figure in my life. I was never able to attend a father daughter dance or even seen my dad at one of my many extracurricular events. As I got older the foundation of how I was raised was still intact. I started to be known as a disrespectful child. Not because I was actually disrespectful but because I did not change myself to fit in with the other people. Being in a small town most of your teachers knew each other so they would talk and that gave me that reputation. I started to defend myself when I felt I was being mistreated or singled out. I still did not say yes ma’am, no ma’am, yes sir, or no sir. The older I got the more I realized why that was such an issue. I was raised by a northerner but I lived in the south. During slavery days if you didn’t answer your master in that way it was sought out that you were disrespectful. That certain subject has been carried on throughout the south for many years. I begin to understand that fully and I found other ways to answer and say things so no one would consider me
...at you’re telling yourself that you are not good enough, you are not smart, not beautiful. Don’t believe that you are not deserve being happy. Don’t believe whatever makes you suffer. Finally, the third rule is don’t believe anyone else. People are lying all the time, and you do not need to believe them. The second step to heal emotional wounds is forgiveness. You must forgive those who hurt you, even when it is unforgivable. You’re not doing for them, you are doing for yourself, because you don’t want to be hurt any time when you remember what happened. The last step that I read in this chapter was love. Love is the medicine that helps the process of healing wounds. To love your neighbor, parent, friend, first you have to love yourself. You cannot be happy if you do not love yourself. In short, there are three simple methods that can heal the emotional wounds.
Here at the University of Alabama in Birmingham (UAB) our goal is to provide excellent care to every patient and family member that enters our facility. Our nationally ranked team of healthcare workers strive daily to improve quality of life to each client we serve. Although there are a number of healthcare workers here at UAB, the nurses here work day and night to ensure that every patient’s needs are met. Furthermore, many of UAB’s nursing staff go out of their way every day in order to satisfy the needs of their clients. The nurses here at the University of Alabama in Birmingham truly believe in the facilities’ core values of own it, do right, work together, and always care. These core values are truly what make a clinical nurse excellent
I can remember going to school and him being very judgmental towards others and telling us “to watch who our friends where” which was his way of saying make sure you are only friends with your own culture. I can remember wanting to be friends with those who were different from me in grade school however because of my father I felt that I couldn’t because I was disobeying him. One event in particular was in the third grade when a African American student moved into town and the home room teacher paired us together to be study partners all year. It was something I hated for the longest time most of the time I spent putting him down or not helping he at all and only worrying about myself because being as senseless as I was then in my own messed up reality I thought I was acting how I should. Finally one day came when I set back and thought why do I not like this kid he’s done nothing to me yet I have treated him horribly since day one. I remember coming to the realization that this kid is not bad he’s not out to get me and just because he’s different doesn’t mean he just be looked at or treated any differently then how I am or how I treat any of my other
Earlier in March 2014 the senior leadership of the Air Force, to include the Secretary of the Air Force, the Chief of Staff, and the Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Force, made a statement to all airmen. They stated that “being an Airman is more than a job, when we voluntarily raised our right hands and took an oath to support and defend the Constitution, we became members of the profession of arms”, they also said that along with our profession of arms we are given and accept a sacred trust given to us by the American people, that to be worthy of this trust we must “build our lives and shape our service on the foundation of our core values”, and that when Airmen fail to live up to our core values, the reputation of all who serve is tarnished” (letter to airman, Mar 2014). Recently, I was tasked to deliver a briefing for the J3 monthly training day. This tasking was a result of my negligence in updating a certain system that is vital to the J3 watch floor. My briefing, although filled with correct information and guidance, was also slaked with profanity and unprofessional gestures. Regardless of any circumstances that may have been the cause for these actions, the actions needed correction. Correction was given, which was responded to by more profanity and provoking actions. After I showed such disrespect to my non-commissioned officer in charge, he escorted me to my supervisor and my actions were made known to him. During this time I was still acting very contentious and disrespectful, making snide comments and standing with such contempt as if to say “are you done now”. This of course escalated into more serious action by my leadership which very well could have been avoided had I done my duty correctly in the first place. The...
Now that I am in the counseling program I have become aware of the dysfunctional family that I have grew up in. Growing up I remember my father was never around. There is a memory I will never forget it seems blurry but I remember my parents arguing and becoming angry. I went into a room and when I came out I saw my father’s hand bleeding. My mother was holding a kitchen knife and she had cut his hand. Since my father was hardly around we never had family trips or family time together. He would spend his weekends drinking or going out with his friends. I have another memory that stands out. I remember I was in the back seat of the car and my mom was dropping of my dad somewhere. They were arguing the whole way over there, once we got to the destination my dad got off and walked out. I can imagine this affected my mother as a woman because her needs were not being
I was always lying to my parents, going out to parties, and staying at places I should not have been. My lifestyle was something I could not talk to my parents about, but I could confide in other friend 's parents or my youth pastors. I always wonder how different my teenage years would have been if my parents were more open and approachable about living life in God 's image. At home, we all knew of our faith and acted according, no cursing, no drinking, but we never specifically spoke of how difficult it can be to not fall into temptation. My parents were not understanding of any mistakes; it was, "you better not be doing those kinds of things," the end. This is not to say my parents are at fault for me being a rebellious teenager who lied to her parents and got drunk on the weekends because I was well aware of the sins I was committing and I attempted many times to
Ever since I was taken from my family I have felt unloved and had a difficult time accepting relationships. Because I let the pain of my past get the best of me, I didn’t take full advantage of my Dad while I still had him.
Values in my opinion should determine your priorities, and they’re probably the measures, you use to tell if your life is turning out the way you want it to. Knowing your own values can help you make decisions about how to live your life. The values that I believe in play a very important role in my life. These important values have been greatly influenced by my family and life experiences. My core values include family, health, knowledge, happiness, friendship, loyalty, trust, hard work, honesty, and learning.
The main goal in life is to live by our beliefs and our values. These beliefs and values define who we are as a person and create how we behave towards others (Wright, 1). These beliefs and values can be defined as our personal core values. My personal core values include family, trust, honesty, friendship, and creativity, which define who I am, change from past to present, and could change again.
During my life, I have learned many things that I’m either expected to do or know. My family and friends have impacted my life in multiple ways that have shaped me as a person over time. These values that my family has taught me has made me the person I am today and most likely the person I will be for the rest of my life.
One beautiful day that summer, I was playing outside with my friends when my mom called for me to come home. I did not want to abandon my guard post at the neighbor's tree house so I decided to disregard her order. I figured that my parents would understand my delima and wouldn't mind if I stayed out for another two or three hours. Unfortunately, they had neglected to inform me that my grandparents had driven in from North Carolina, and we were supposed to go out for a nice dinner. When I finally returned, my father was furious. I had kept them from going to dinner, and he was simply not happy with me. "Go up to your room and don't even think about coming downstairs until I talk to you."