Men and women undoubtedly have different perspectives of the world. The world is shaped much differently for each gender. Males have expected responsibilities according to society, and so do women. These roles are defined through each genders’ childhood as described in Deborah Tannen’s, “Women and Men In Conversation”, where Tannen describes how conversation between women and men can cause conflicts because of their different understanding of conversations. For instance in, “Women and Men In Conversation”, Tannen explains that women and men find friends among their own genders and women grow up sharing secrets and talking to create bonds, where as men often spend time together and do things instead of talking. This is why when growing up men aren’t bothered by silence, but women perceive it as a negative sign in their relationship. Tannen also further describes miscommunication between genders in another essay known as, “But What Do You Mean?” Here she explains that women and men have different ways of expressing what is appropriate in a conversation. Women feel that when having a conversation, it is more appropriate to consider the other person’s feeling, however, men feel that it is appropriate to maintain their hierarchy causing women to be at a disadvantage because men will …show more content…
Through these stereotypes miscommunication between men and women is complicated even further because ideas of the opposite gender are assumed; which makes it difficult to understand the opposite gender properly. Not only this, but also their perspectives about the world become polarized as well. Even though women and men grow up having different styles of appropriateness in conversations such as apologies, fighting, listening, jokes and etc. they can find ways to adapt to another to avoid
The stereotypical fights between men and women have been very controversial since as long as we can all remember. No one had thought about how much issues that had to deal with our gender would cause to everyone or have thought about the stereotypes this would impact on us.
Nowadays women should be treated equally, but some very common stereotypes are still used. For example, in my last birthday, I received a gift from my friend in a pink bag. Then, I asked my friend, why he picked a pink bag, he simply replied "all women like pink," but actually he did not know that my favorite color was blue, and that does not mean that I am a boy. On another occasion, I was taking care of my little cousin, he began to play soccer, and when I asked him if I could play with him, he answered me, "not because girls do not know how to play football," his answer surprised me, so I take his soccer ball, and I showed him that he was wrong, because women can play different sports.
Deborah Tannen is the author of the book You Just Don't Understand where she analyzes the different meanings of communication between men and women. Her research shows that women and men use the same words and phrases and yet can interpret and react to those same words and phrases differently. Tannen compares the two sexes to find men use their conversation as a type of competition or to preserve their independence. For example, men talk about their knowledge regarding sports, cars, women, exc. Meanwhile, women try to foster intimacy through communication. For instance, women often talk and relate on a personal level. Throughout Tannen's book she uses "cross-cultural communication" to describe the differences between the language of men and women. Tannen observed that, "For males, conversation is the way you negotiate your status in the group and keep people from pushing you around; you use talk to preserve your independence. Females, on the other hand, use conversation to negotiate closeness and intimacy; talk is the essence of intimacy, so being best friends means sitting and talking. For boys, activities, doing things together, are central. Just sitting and talking is not an essential part of friendship. They're friends with the boys they do things with" (Tannen 95).
Therefore, they can become demanding, resentful, judgmental, and intolerant of each other (13). However, when men and women learn to respect each other’s differences, they can live in tranquility (Tannen, Talking 40). Men and women react and behave differently when expressing difficult feelings, dealing with stress, and evaluating their self-worth.
Do men and women effectively communicate in the same way, or is it just a conversation of misunderstanding? There is constantly a new interest in whether men and women converse successfully. Professor and journalist, Deborah Tannen writes, “Sex, Lies, and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” Tannen compares and contrasts all conversational styles, and explains how the expectation of dialogue affects how men and women converse. Tannen focuses on the subject of marriage and the imbalance of interest between male and female couples. The contrasting perspective however comes from, Deborah Cameron, author of, “What Language Barrier”. Cameron conveys that the stereotypes left upon male and female communication
Further evidence of communicative differences exist between men and women in various other social settings as well. Consider, for example, those individuals employed in customer service-related Jobs. While in JC Penny, I noticed that female customer service representatives were more apt to offer immediate friendly assistance than the male reps. Men are not as cocky nor as confident in this sort of situation; their eyes tend to dart around the area of the store while the eyes of a women remain focused upon the eyes of the customer. The men seem to communicate with a lot less smiles. Apparently they have to get past a certain “ice-breaking'; point before they will feel comfortable with a genuine look of happiness.
...roblems of inter sex communication. She does a superb job of pointing out how each sex reacts to each situation and why, but does not even propose a solution. Now that I have read this case study I feel as though I am prepared to offer a solution although I am not sure how viable it is. The recurring themes of Tannen’s case study are that men are expected to be tough and women are expected to seek support. These themes seem to be the root of the conflict between the sexes, so I would propose that each sex should do their best to break away from these expectations. Men should strive to be more open and less concerned about preserving a macho image whereas women should strive to be less dependent on the approval of others. While my proposed solution would not completely abolish miscommunication between the sexes, it would be a large step in the right direction.
Communication between males and females has always been somewhat complicated. Because we are arguing that males and females have different cultures we wanted to take a look at what some of these differences might be. According to our research the inherent differences between male and female culture are the different roles that society holds for them and the ways these roles lead to different communication styles. The stereotypes that men and women grow up with affect the types of ways in which they communicate. We first wanted to take a look at how they specifically differ while men and women are arguing or having normal conversations. We also looked at the different types of networks that men and women share. These networks also differ and as do the reasonings for their formation. Although we do not think that men and women need to change their cultures to effectively communicate, we do think that better communication is possible. One of the researchers we took a look at was Deborah Tannen. According to Tannen the reason that men and women do not communicate well is that men and women use language differently. Women take the attitude that conversation is to explore solutions to common problems while men concern themselves more with getting information and hard data from conversation. Tannen states that what women look for in communication is human connection, while men consider status to be most important. They are looking for independence and are constantly looking for higher accomplishments. Intimacy threatens this independence, so men have a tendency to avoid it. One of the old sayings about women is that they talk more than men. It turns out that it is not necessarily true. Women seem to talk more in private conversations than do men. Women do not generally have a fear of intimacy and therefore are much more open with one another during private conversations. It is more difficult for women to use this type of communication style in the public arena. In that case it is men that do most of the talking. Tannen ultimately argues that men use communication as a weapon. They use long explanations to command attention from who it is they are speaking to. They use it to convey information and to ultimately gain agreement. Tannen suggests that through even simple conversation men are continually protecting their status. She sugg...
According to Eagley, Wood, and Fishbaugh (1981), women are more concerned than men about the quality of interpersonal relationships. Women take greater responsibility for establishing and maintaining interpersonal bonds, whereas men do not. Also, women are more empathetic and more accurate at decoding nonverbal communication than males. Male gender roles also claim that men should remain independent and not agree closely with others, while it is seen as acceptable for women to conform to group behaviors.
Gender stereotypes are ideas simplified, but strongly assumed, on the characteristics of men and women, that translates into a series of tasks and activities that are assign in each culture. Along life, family, school, and environment, Society thought us what is right and what is not in being men or women. Starting with the form we dress, talk, express, behave, to what we can play or what sport to participate. The margin of the biological endowment differences males and females; the fact of being women or men implies a long process of learning and adaptation to the rules established starting with work, personality, love and desires. In the movie "The Ugly Truth." you can see different situations that reflect what society is teaching us for
Men and women are more different than one can imagine. Though the main difference is in physical appearance, another difference is their sense of communication. Women appear to talk more than males, but like to keep their conversations more private. Males, on the other hand, will talk less, but do not mind their conversations being more public. This is just one of many examples of men and women being completely opposite of one another in terms of communication. Each gender has their own expectations of the opposite. These expectations are not usually met due to communication differences, which leads to criticisms such as, “Men do not listen” or “Women will never understand” to form. The most common assumption for why expectations are not met
...or a relationship”. In genderlects, there is no superior or inferior method of communication, but rather, men and women just communicate differently. By understanding these differences, one can reduce the amount of misunderstandings in future conversations.
Everybody is born and made differently, but one thing is similar, our gender. We are born either male or female, and in society everybody judges us for our gender. This is called gender roles; societies expecting you to act like a male or female (Rathus, 2010). Some people say, “act like a lady,” or “be a man,” these are examples of how gender roles work in our everyday lives. In society when we think stereotypes, what do we think? Many think of jocks, nerds, or popular kids; gender stereotyping is very similar. Gender stereotypes are thoughts of what the gender is supposed to behave like (Rathus, 2010). One example of a gender stereotype for a man would be a worker for the family, and a women stereotype would be a stay at home mom. Though in todays age we don’t see this as much, but it is still around us. In different situations both gender roles and stereotypes are said and done on a daily basis and we can’t avoid them because everyone is different.
Gender communication focused on the method of expressing a thought or idea through the use of a gender in the relationship and the role of people. Some will argue that gender communication is qualified as a form of intercultural communication on the development of effective communication skills when we interact with an opposite sex. The communication between men and women have a huge difference because people from different culture speak different dialects. In the current society, it is common for us to hear phrases such as “ you men (women) are from a different planet,”these phrases are developed due to the miscommunication between men and women over the course of evolution. Men and women had developed different methods of
Essentially, we are all different. We use language differently and interpret language differently. This is what we base our perceptions of others on, thus it is ultimately what dictates our interaction with others. The fact that men’s and women’s interaction differs because the two sexes generally interpret things differently is not a strange phenomenon, because we are all different.