When a person is grieving they believe that they are on a walk alone in a dark path. On this walk alone, when there are no words, the only thing that helps an individual continue on his or her path is silence. Creating time to reflect is essential as it allows for reconnection with inner thoughts and emotions. Using silence to reflect is evident within both, Athos and Jakob’s lives. “Some stones are so heavy only silence helps you carry them.” (Michaels 77). This quote displays Athos’s way of coping with the loss of his wife during the first war. He practices silence in order to allow himself to heal. Time gives the ability to sink down, reflect, and learn about what has happened preventing drowning in sorrow and heartache later on. “History
In the book The Chosen the four main characters have different views on how children should be raised. Danny Saunders was said to be raised in silence. Danny was raised in silence in that communication was cut off between Danny and his father, except when they were studying Talmud. The reason Danny’s father did not speak to his son is because Rabbi Saunders wanted to have Danny think things through himself. Reb Saunders also wanted Danny to grow up in the same manner he himself was raised.
It is common for those experiencing grief to deny the death altogether. Many people do this by avoiding situations and places that remind them of the deceased (Leming & Dickinson, 2016). However, by simply avoiding the topic of death and pain, the mourner only achieves temporary relief while in turn creating more permanent lasting agony (Rich, 2005). In this stage, mourners will begin to feel the full weight of the circumstance. Whether the death of a loved one was sudden or long-term, survivors will feel a full range of emotions, such as sadness, guilt, anger, frustration, hopelessness, or grief. While many of these emotions can cause serious suffering, it is important for the survivor to feel whatever emotions come up and deal with those feelings, rather than trying to suppress any
The feelings of loss, or the void of a distant love are both attached to forms of grieving, and are symbolically tied to darkness, melancholy, and other negative things. The loss of a loved one, either to death, distance, or disagreement results in distress that often is expressed in many different ways. Solitude, longing, woe, and lament are the usual results of lovesickness, or grieving, and are forms of dealing with a loss of a relationship either physically, mentally, or both. When first reading “Zero Degrees” by Elizabeth Spires, my initial image was of the upcoming winter; cold, dark and long. The image of a person lamenting the absence of a loved one during a cold night, where the bedding itself is a reminder of what is lacking evokes feelings of solitude and sadness. These concepts all express a lack, or a void, something as humans we all strive to fill, and in the process, fear. In this essay I will look to uncover how ”Zero Degrees” conveys the concept of void and mourning in the context of relationships and nature.
“I might have said, 'He's got over it. He's forgotten his wife,' when the truth was, 'He remembers her better because he has partly got over it.'” (4). When analyzing Lewis’ discussion of grief, one should focus on his preconception of grief prior to his experience of loss. Prior to losing his wife, Lewis originally thought that grief was a time of extreme sorrow and anguish, but one that is eventually overcome and healed, as a barrier is overcome and conquered or an injury healed. After personally experiencing the death of Helen, Lewis begins to understand that it is a daily process of readjustment, not one of overcoming. Although healing and life can occur afterward, Lewis suggests that it cannot be the same. Nor would Lewis agree that the healing and peace of grief comes by forgetting the death and pain, rather, grief can only bring healing and peace once people accept the inevitable truth, let go of the past to a degree to move forward, and begin the journey with God into the stores of the
One summer I awoke to the chirping of my cell phone. I was really confused because I had a bunch of notifications. On a normal day I usually only have a couple. When I checked to see what they were, I discovered that they were all concerning my best friend. They all said “I’m so sorry for what happened.” I got really confused and stumbled down the stairs to talk to my mom. When I saw her, she had tears running down her face and she said “He’s gone.” My emotions hit me like a runaway train and I immediately went into a depression. The grieving process had just started and it was awful. Eventually, I knew it was necessary in order to heal. Grief marks our memories with sadness and pain; however, this way of coping is the essential key to moving on with our lives.
When we push our grief away, it seems to go underground and can affect our lives in many unpredictable ways. Stephen Levine, the well-known author on death and
“Crying is all right in its way while it lasts. But you have to stop sooner or later, and then you still have to decide what to do.” (C.S. Lewis, The Silver Chair, 1953). Upon first reading this quote, it felt like my grieving period was validated and that I was being encouraged to find my way again through some big decisions that would need to be made.
In the story “The Beginnings of grief” Adam Haslett’s protagonist demonstrate the power that grief can have in a person 's life, and one may find comfort in pain and violent encounters with another human being while one is gathering the strength to survive.
In spite the basic requirements for human’s survival, personal relationships should be added because not many people are able to function well without intimate relationship with other people or valuable things. Due to this fact, grief occurs when there is a loss either through death, divorce, and theft or when something valuable to an individual can no longer be reached. Grief is that period of time when loss is felt acutely, and the feelings of loss are still very raw to the person. This paper is based on the book of Lament for a Son which was written by Nicholas Wolterstorff, a collection of narratives by this author who is going through grief due to the premature death of his 25 years old son, Eric, who died by an accident when climbing
Grief can arise from loss, whether large-scale or small, and may not be easily removed once it takes hold. Because of grief’s obstinate nature, many approaches have been developed in order to handle the repressive, and often painful, effects it can have on people’s lives. One of those approaches is Elizabeth Kübler-Ross’s theory, The Five Stages of Grief. In Sierra Skye Gemma’s essay, “The Wrong Way”, she juxtaposes her own personal experiences with grief against Kübler-Ross’s hypothesis. Gemma uses her confessional, combined with empirical evidence that contradicts the Five Stages of Grief, to demonstrate that feelings of grief are unique to the individual; therefore, there is no right way to mourn.
This process is not easy because having a grief and working through the pain is very different from each other. This process is a broad concept because it includes several positive ways of handing the grief. The proper identification of the various emotions regarding pain and dealing with those is the main procedure of this task. The various emotions of grief are shame, hopelessness, fear, anger, guilt, sadness, loneliness, lack of hope, feeling emptiness (Beckett & Dykeman, 2017). The task can be accomplished in a correct manner if the griever is properly acknowledged by talking and understanding. Though there is one limitation in this process which can be a complex situation that is the griever can deny all the emotions and avoid talking about them. This process can create distress and anguish inside the mind of the griever. Sometimes this problem may rise due to the attitude of the society which creates a sense of grief inside the mind of the griever who tends to avoid the whole situation thinking nobody would understand. This whole criterion can be resolved if there is a proper sense of understanding among the griever and the society. (Brown,
Grief is a very horrible and sad feeling and often is caused by lose of something or someone important to someone. In the story “always a motive” by Dan Ross and the song “Tears in heaven” both protagonists had lost a son at some point in their past and convey their feeling of grief in their own ways. Dan Ross shows that his character is hurt very badly because of his son’s death and tries to get away from it. Eric Clapton deals with his grief by expressing it in a song to his son trying to reach to the other side asking questions that cannot be answered. Both of these pieces of literature convey a feeling of helplessness and desperation.
Psychodynamic models of grief were the first major theories of grief with Freud's paper Mourning and melancholia (1917/1957), shaping the foundational assumption of grief work involving the process of the bereaved exploring their distress and releasing their ties to the deceased (Hall, 2014; Neimeyer, 2014; Shapiro, 2007). That is, the bereaved cognitively confront the loss and confront the experience of bereavement (M. Stroebe & Schut, 1999). Furthermore, the grief work model proposed that the phase of 'moving on' and returning to a normal life was a pivotal process, where failing to do so would ensue the grief process becoming complicated and the development of psychopathology (Hall, 2014). However, subsequent research on the grief work model
My grief, my feelings, my emotions were like an untold story that begged to be released, but I shut it all out. But then I read a book called, “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings” by Maya Angelou, and one of the quotes sort of spoke to me in a way. It was, “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story.” And that made me think. It made me realize that I had to deal with my grief, I had to cope. So I did. I wrote stories and poetry about my feelings, I watched tv shows and read a lot of books, all just to cope and deal with my grief. During that time I found out that I loved to read, to write. I found out that I loved to analyze stories as well, whether those stories were in books, movies or tv shows, I loved to analyze them. And later I learned that even though life wasn't fair, I could find a way to make it
Imagine growing up without a father. Imagine a little girl who can’t run to him for protection when things go wrong, no one to comfort her when a boy breaks her heart, or to be there for every monumental occasion in her life. Experiencing the death of a parent will leave a hole in the child’s heart that can never be filled. I lost my father at the young of five, and every moment since then has impacted me deeply. A child has to grasp the few and precious recollections that they have experienced with the parent, and never forget them, because that’s all they will ever have. Families will never be as whole, nor will they forget the anguish that has been inflicted upon them. Therefore, the sudden death of a parent has lasting effects on those