Attitude Differences in Marriages

I was raised in a traditional home were my mother was a homemaker ensuring that all my siblings and I were cared for while my father worked. My parent’s unconditional love for each other provided us a happy home. Though they had arguments and disagreements, I never saw my father mentally or physically abuse my mother. Being the ninth of ten children, my parents promoted equality between all of us. Dr. Jawanza Kunjufu book, “Where are you Adam?” Stated that, “We love our sons and we train our daughters.” Culturally speaking, this statement was emphasized in the Hispanic culture, from my early age as a young girl. Females were responsible for the daily indoors chores such as cooking, laundry and childcare. Males were responsible for the outdoor chores such as yard work, home improvements and farming.

Men are taught to be the head of the household, the provider and sacrifice for the success of the family. As the head of the household the male figure is to make the decisions whether good or bad provided it benefits the family. Provide financially, the safety and well being of the family and the future success and support of the children. He sacrifices to provide financially for the family whether it be hard labor or multiple jobs. This is the reason for many Hispanic male figures are found to be laborers.

Women are supposed to be submissive, self-sacrificing, and responsible for running the household. Submissive in the satisfaction of both the husband and the children. Women are to be submissive in a way of satisfaction for the husband whether it is pleasure or serving his every need. Self-sacrificing results in long hours for both the husband and children. Likewise, self-sacrificing could also be pleasing her family and dedication ...

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...ut exceptions hit rough spots. There will be times when you adore your spouse, times when you can’t stand the sight of your spouse. Feeling towards a spouse and marriage comes in a rollercoaster of emotions. Having a realistic image of marriage and knowing that marriage will have times of disconnect will make it easier to deal with bad times. People who leave “bad” marriages in search of better ones are just leavening a bad situation that is inevitable no matter what you do and they frequently disappointed to find out that their new relationship includes them too. Although we marry for the good times, the bad times are part of the package, we sign up for them when we stood in front of the alter, and is up to the individual to make or break the marriage work. Given the opportunity and the application of appropriate relationship skills, the bad times ultimately pass.