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The consequences of lying stephanie Ericsson the way we lie
What is society's view about lying
The consequences of lying stephanie Ericsson the way we lie
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In “The Ways We Lie,” by Stephanie Ericsson, she defines various types of lying and uses quotations at the beginning of each description as a rhetorical strategy. Throughout the reading she uses similar references or discussion points at the beginning and ending of each paragraph. Most believe lying is wrong, however, I believe lying is acceptable in some situations and not others when Stephanie Ericsson is asked, “how was your day.” In “The Ways We Lie,” she lies to protect her husband’s feelings, therefore, I think people lie because they are afraid of the consequences that come with telling the truth. For every action there is a consequence. In, “The Ways We Lie,” by Stephanie Ericsson she quotes, “We must consider the meaning of our actions” …show more content…
She states, “Any good liar knows that the way to perpetuate an untruth is to deflect attention from it” (Ericsson 123). This is true. I remember getting in trouble with my parents for lying about my bad grades. Knowingly, that I was not the only one in the house with bad grades, when I was getting yelled at and listening to a lecture from my parents. I deflected all attention by announcing to my parents that my sisters also had bad grades. Deflecting all the attention off of me my parents were quick to call my sisters and lecture them about their grades. Learning from that I had learned to deflect my lies so that I would not get in trouble in the …show more content…
Stephanie Ericsson’s The Ways We Lie, analyzes and reflects on how lying has simply become the norm in our society. We all lie, there is not one person in the world that does not lie. Most people lie because they are afraid of telling the truth, however what they do not know is telling a lie can lead them in the wrong direction because many things can happen when lying to a person. The person can find out when everything unravels that person will not have trust in you and you would be known as a liar. To every action there is a consequence, so why not deal with just one consequence when telling the
Author Allison Kornet in her article (1997) “The Truth about Lying: Has Lying Gotten a Bad Rap” states that deception or lying has become a part of everyone’s life. A person lies or deceives as often as he brushes his teeth or combs his hair. Many psychologists have neglected or ignored the concept of deception or lying and its effects on everyone’s life. Kornet explains that in the previous two to three decades, the psychologists started noticing or analyzing the effects of a person’s deception on others or why a person lies so many times in his day-to-day life. The person might learn lying from childhood
Both Stephanie Ericsson’s essay “The Way We Lie” and William F. Buckley, Jr.’s essay “Why Don’t We Complain” analyze different ways people use lies to help and hurt themselves in their daily lives and how lies influence American culture. Through personal experience and examples Ericsson showed the way people lie to get what they want or to look more lovely. She showed that it is almost impossible to eliminate lies from people’s lives, how American culture has adopted many lies, and how so much is based on simple, "harmless" lies. In Buckley’s essay, he is uncomfortable that in some situations people do not complain. They could use their complaints to make some change. When people are used to keeping silent avoid problems or waiting someone else to solve the problem.
“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life, but define yourself.”– Harvey Fierstein
American writer and speaker, Dorothy Allison, once said “things come apart so easily when they have been held together by lies” (Allison). One of the first lessons that kids are taught is to be honest and always tell the truth. Being honest is not always easy, but the result of lying is much worse then telling the truth. In Animal Farm, George Orwell demonstrates how lies and deceit will ruin society if everyone always believes what the leader says, people lie to themself, and if laws are changed to benefit the group in power.
John Ruskin once said, “The essence of lying is in deception, not in words”. With regards to what Ruskin talks about, deception is an act that Americans have lovingly embraced. It has been so embraced that we don 't even know if we are deceiving or being deceived. Stephanie Ericsson’s essay, “The Ways We Lie”, claims that “our acceptance of lies becomes a cultural cancer that eventually shrouds and reorders reality until moral garbage becomes as invisible as water is to fish” (343). In a sense, the relation between Ruskin’s quote and Ericsson’s claim is they both describe the current state of the American culture. The modern American culture is full of deceit and lies whether it’s to protect someone or hide a secret. And yet, we still accept
These types of lies are easily distributed in society by the masses because they sound harmless. Lies aren’t only bad, but they come with a high price. That price is trust, once someone’s trust is broken it takes a lot of time to get it back. “Trust is one thing you can’t put back together once it’s broken” (Berenstain 17).
The society that we live in today is built around lies. Banks lying to customers in order to feed the capitalist mindset, politicians lying to citizens in order to gain power, and charities taking donations with open arms however are stingy when giving back to the cause. The common reason why these organizations lie is to hide what they truly are. People also deceive others in order to hide who they truly are. From a young age, lying becomes engraved into one’s mind, we are taught to walk, talk, and lie.
Lying is bad but the fear that can come from it is worse. Fear can rule a person which drives them to extreme and irrational acts that can shape society in a negative way. We as people are so accustomed to how we should act that during times of fear and crisis our vision is blurred and sometimes our decision making abilities are impaired. We often look past at how much fear can affect us and our society. Starting from Salem 1692 and going to the McCarthy era fear ruled the people and even now in present time America we are constantly living in fear.
Are everyday rituals, such as, facades reflected as to being a lie? Simply preparing for a meeting or interview does not come off as lying, although another type of façade such as when someone asks, “Are you okay,” after a death of someone close to you, in reality it is a form of a lie, because you are not being honest. In Stephanie Erricsson’s article “The Ways We Lie,” she discusses many different types of lying, that most wouldn’t even consider. Ericsson claimed, “But façades can be destructive because they are used to seduce others into an illusion” (409). Depending how a façade is used, the outcome can be beneficial or damaging. There are facades that are used to cover up one’s true feelings, in order to protect an individual and then there is a type in which one puts on a mask to cover up how awful of a person they are. Charity, a former friend, deceived me with the qualities of everything she was not, my mom is a great example of when it comes to hiding when she is saddened. In this article “The Ways We Lie,” Stephanie Ericsson has a great point of view on the destructiveness of facades, although, it can very well be used in a good way just as much as in a bad way, in fact, like my protective mother, using facades for mine and my sisters own good and then a conniving friend using facades in
Traditionally, it is agreed that any and every form of telling the truth is always the best thing to do. In the essays of Stephen L Carter and Stephanie Ericsson, this ideal is not exactly true. It is expressed in "The Insufficiency of Honesty" as well as "The Ways We Lie" that honesty is hard to come by and that there is more to it than believed. The authors convey their views by first defining what the concept is, picking it apart, and then use common occurrences for examples of the points they had made.
Lies can be expressed in a variety of ways, as listed in the reading “The Way We Lie” (Ericsson, Pg. 216-224). At times you can tell a lie without getting noticed but other times you can get caught in between a lie, and what good is the truth when you could hurt the other person’s feeling such as saying “ Man, you don’t look good today” or “ Oh my gosh, what are you wearing? This isn’t the 20th century” there are always different ways people take in criticism either they take it positively and approve and grow from that, or they can look at it negatively bringing their self-esteem down and then even making them think that there outer appearance as well as inner isn’t considered ‘right’. Even though we don’t seem to see their reaction to the truth or unfriendly reminder of something that was said to them, those words may still mock them, since it was about them. The thing about a ‘white lie’ is it’s just a small lie, only meaning to boost up other people whereas, when it’s not a white lie, the lie is usually used to protect, oneself in a situation. Although white lies are said to never be told they at times can save relationship(s), even giving good complicates to people to make them feel good about herself and , and plus everyone lies why should you be looked down upon when others tell white lies as well.
We lie all the time, lying is not something new to our culture. We lie to our parents, we lie to our friends, we even lie to our significant other, but why do we do it? There is not one set reason on why we lie but they can vary from an insignificant reason to something more nefarious. A good operational definition of a lie is “A lie is a false statement to a person or group made by another person or group who knows it is not the whole truth, intentionally.” (Freitas-Magalhães) We have been raised to know that lying is usually a bad thing, and it’s better to tell the truth, not to mention the circumstances get exponentially worse if you are caught lying. No one wants to be labeled as a liar, or untrustworthy. This may sound unorthodox but I personally think lying is perfectly fine; depending on the situation. If you have a prima-facie duty to be dishonest it’s perfectly acceptable. Ross says a prima facie duty or obligation is an actual duty. “One’s actual duty is what one ought to do all things considered.” (Carson) I’m not the only one who finds this too be true. Ross would also agree with me, He says “Lying is permissible or obligatory when the duty not to lie conflicts with a more important or equal important prima facie duty.” (Carson) As I was doing research on this topic I did read one extremely compelling argument on why we ought not to lie. Aristotle basically said a person who makes a defense for lying could never be trusted. (King.)
What are lies? A lie is defined as follows: To make a statement that one knows to be false, especially with the intent to deceive. There are several ways that lies are told for instance, there are white lies, lies of omission, bold faced lies, and lies of exaggeration. No matter what type of lie that one chooses to tell many people believe that lies do more harm than good.
Growing up, we are always told to never lie because it is the worst thing you could ever do. “Lying will only lead to a horrible situation with less than mediocre results. While lying is not always good, it is not always bad either. Samuel Butler once said “Lying has a kind of respect and reverence with it. We pay a person the compliment of acknowledging his superiority whenever we lie to him.
Telling the truth teaches one person self- respect for themselves and others as well. Telling the truth also sets a good example for others to do the same thing and make a “chain reaction”. People can make a “chain reaction” by passing on what they have done from one person to another, and before you know it, everyone is changing greatly, and the world is progressing tremendously. Lies are told all around the world, and they are told every day. One lie can often lead to another lie and cause you to be caught up in one big lie that will be hard to get out of if people do not tell the truth. If a person thinks that is okay to lie, they better think again, the truth always comes out no matter how hard a person tries to keep it in, or how much someone thinks that they can get away with lying. No person can keep in or hold a grudge with what they have done. After all, telling the truth is the right thing to do, and everyone should do it. Telling the truth is always much easier than the trouble of a