In his 2010 essay “America: Land of Loners?,” Daniel Akst argues that America has turned to a nation that places friendship very low in its priorities. He describes the parallels between our lives and the lives of Solarians in the science-fiction novel The Naked Sun by Isaac Asimov, saying that we keep ourselves physically isolated and communicate virtually, except for in very special circumstances. Despite having many friends on Facebook and other social media sites, we tend to overlook real friendships, preferring “a diluted kind” of relationship available digitally, and something we can take far less seriously than our familial relationships. This is sad, he asserts, because by choosing these watered down friendships, we miss out on the …show more content…
4) and says that in contrast to Artistotle, Americans take friendships not at all seriously. We may have plenty of casual acquaintances, but very few true friends with whom we can share deep connections. Rather than gaining the benefits of a relationship with boundaries, we focus on relationships that can take us over. Taking care of our emotional health is something we choose to do independently, even though we are so dependent in many other areas of our survival. We live alone more often, we join social organizations in the lowest numbers of the last century, and up to one fourth of us have no one to confide in, and on average, a person has four close relationships, and half of these are spouses and children. In fact, when we do feel like talking, we pay for it when we hire therapists, or adopt pets. He says, referencing University of Chicago psychologist John Cacioppo, that Americans are lonely more because of the rushed way we tend to our social relationships which reduces meaningful connections. He goes on to say that we are “locked in what social critic Barbara Ehrenreich has called ‘the cult of conspicuous busyness’,” (par. 10) and that we strive to gain a respect from this lifestyle that then leaves us no time to devote to building intimates
5). By never losing touch with acquaintances made throughout life, we lose what has made “good old-fashioned” losing touch so good (para. 5). We lose real friendships and “long-forgotten photos and mixtapes” (para. 5). Without these natural aspects that are so important to friendship, friends have not only lost their worth, but the whole point of a friendship has been lost as well. Arguing that losing touch is a necessity of friendship, Brown suggests that maybe the issue could be resolved if only social networks would create a “Fade Utility” app that would allow unintended friends to gradually blur into a sepia cast, similar to the way unintended friends naturally fade away from our lives (para. 6). Maybe if networks treated friendships the way nature does, providing opportunities for people to reach out to lost friends if they choose, then online friendships might hold the same meaning as natural friendships, where the title “friend” is not just a banner of status, but a position in a
In this passage, an excerpt from Anthony Doerr’s novel, All the Light We Cannot See, Doerr depicts Werner, an orphan German boy, visiting Frederick’s house, whom he had met in Schulpforta, an elite Nazi academy. Through the experiences Werner has with Frederick’s family in Berlin, Doerr emphasizes Werner’s discomfort towards Frederick’s relationship with his mother to convey the corrupt nature of parental love may harm the child.
Chapter 17 of The Sun Also Rises stands out to be the most violent chapter in the novel. The chapter begins with Bill and Mike being kicked out of a bar. Both men are with a young lady named Eda, who is a friend of Bill. Bill and Mike got into an altercation between English and American tourists in the bar. Bill becomes upset because he believes the English tourists insulted Mike because he was bankrupt and owed them money.
It is an act to ultimately benefit one self. Conversely, it is also what is known as self-righteousness, where one claims to be charitable and or virtuous towards others, when all the while there is a hidden agenda to benefit one-self. The so-called “friendship” is only to benefit the oneself. Unfortunately, this type of self-love can lead to loneliness and loss of true friendships. As much as people may believe that true friendship is not necessary, it is our inherent human need to be in a relationship with other human beings, and/or to develop a form of friendship. To prove the theory that friendship is necessary, an article published by the Journal of Clinical & Diagnostic Research suggests that there is a correlation between loneliness and psychiatric disorders. According to this study, they stated that as human beings, we are a social species which require safe and secure social surroundings to survive. Friendship and/or social relationships are essential for mental and physical well beings (Mushtaq, R., Shoib, S., Shah, T., & Mushtaq, S. (2014). Without social interactions, loneliness ensues, and loneliness can lead to various psychiatric disorders like depression, alcohol abuse, child abuse, sleep problems, personality disorders and Alzheimer’s disease, just to name a few. Not to mention, it can also lead to physiological disorders. Most importantly, loneliness can have serious consequences for mental and physical health of people (Mushtaq, R., Shoib, S., Shah, T., & Mushtaq, S.
The first influential factor to the atrophy of social life that Eitzen writes about is moving away. Americans nowadays are always on the go – if moving is the most convenient idea, they will move with no regard to formed relationships that will soon be broken. People are often forced to move in order to follow a job or because of problems within the family. Constantly moving about causes a decline in intimate relationships. This is also true in people who live alone. The lack of regular and reliable social interaction can lead to a less sociable personality and less motivation to form real relationships. Real relationships are what lead to a healthy social life.
“Social” networks and loneliness are two very unlike things to be discussed simultaneously... The two are complete opposite of one another: “social” is associated to relating to one’s society, loneliness can be defined as “a complex and unpleasant emotional response to a feeling of isolation” (Ye and Lin 166). While loneliness can mean solitude, it also includes feelings of isolation and disconnection to other people (Ye and Lin 166). John Cacioppo is labeled as the world’s leading expert on loneliness. He proposed a thought provoking analogy: a car can be used to pick up friends, but one chooses to ride alone. Did the car make the person lonely? (Marche 68). Absolutely not. The car is simply a tool in the person’s everyday life. This relates
Have you ever made any friends via Facebook, Twitter, or Snapchat that you have never met before? I know I have through Twitter due to having the same interests. Some may say those friends are not really your friends, but virtual ones instead. In the article, “The Limits of Friendships,” by Maria Konnikova, she talks about friendships that are made virtually and in reality. The author argues that the use of social media has hindered friendships and face to face connections within one’s social circle, however, she does not address that they have met their closest support group through social media. Face to face connections help identify who one’s true friends are and they are more realistically made when it is in person rather than over social media, but there Konnikova fails to address the fact that social media has allowed many to connect
In her article “Friends Indeed?” Joel Garreau explains that for two decades, online social networks have been touted as one of the finest flowerings of our new era. But what is the strength of ties so weak as to barely exist? Who will lend you lunch money? Who’s got your back?” Technology has overtaken individuals by social media, allowing many people to communicate online rather than having face-to-face communication. Many “relationships” begin online, and end online. Although, true relationships are rarely created fast, it gradually grows and becomes stronger and stronger over the years. However, in our immediate society this is not the case. But the questions still remains, as Joel Garreau points out “Who would lend you lunch money?” in other words, who will help you physically not online. In our impatient society, technologies influenced the way individual communicate, and that often times leads to depression, loneliness and addictions.
Turkle provides dialogues of individuals who avoid social interactions at all cost and would rather communicate through technology, as it is just an inconvenience to have direct confrontations. These dialogues strongly support Turkle’s argument that we’re creating a greater gap between others and ourselves. The reason we are lonely is because we place less effort into building relations with others.
“The Facebook Sonnet” by Sherman Alexie brings up ideas and controversy over social media because it decreases face-to-face communication. Though Facebook allows people to contact old and new friends, it renders away from the traditional social interaction. Online, people are easily connected by one simple click. From liking one’s status to posting multiple pictures, Facebook demands so much attention that it’s easy for users to get attach. They get caught up in all the online aspect of their lives that they fail to appreciate real life relationships and experiences.
The novel starts off with an intersting hook: “Mariam was five years old the first time she heard the word harami” (Hosseini 3). The word harami was later then translated as “bastard” after the author of the novel, Khaled Hosseini, left his audience with a little cliffhanger. From the very first page, the theme of shame envelops Mariam’s story. Throughout the novel, the very word “harami” will be used as a weapon, accusation, or simply a placeholder for the fact that Mariam occupies the lowest rung on the social laddar in Afghanistan. As the novel continues on in third person narrative, it was known that Mariam being the illegitimate child of her father Jalil, a successful wealthy man in the city of Herat, was sent to live in the one room “kolba”
Naturally, human beings are social beings and cannot live without friends. Friendship is an essential part of the structure of human existence. Today’s people are seeking and participating in relationships because they believe that it is good to have friends so as to experience pleasure, to be honored, to be healthy, and to prosper in life. Even in the inferior kind of friendships, people cooperate for the common advantage or pleasure. Irrespective of qualifications, career, personal perspectives, cultural differences, and interests, all people seek for love and acknowledgement from others (Curzer, 2012). This means that at a particular time, every individual will seek for a friendship, whether based on utility, pleasure, or even virtuous
Expedition Balance says that 200,000 veterans go homeless each night and 45% of them suffer from PTSD or mental illness. “Stop the Sun” by Gary Paulsen is about a boy named Terry whose father was in the Vietnam War. After Terry’s father came back from the war he started to act differently which made terry worry for his father. When terry does ask his mom about his father she only tells him the doctor calls it Vietnam Syndrome, but that's all she told him. Terry now wants to know why his dad acts them ways he's been acting and how he got Vietnam Syndrome which now is believed to be PTSD. Once Terry does confront his father and asks him what happened during the war his father says that he was the only one out of 54 to survive an attack. Gary Paulsen successfully showcased the causes, symptoms, and treatment of PTSD in his story “Stop the Sun.”
Rosen, Christine. “Virtual Friendship and the New Narcissism.” What Matters In America. Third Edition. Gary Goshgarian and Kathryn Goodfellow. New Jersey: Pearson, 2012. 52-60. Print.
Marche, Stephen. “Is Facebook Making us Lonely? (Cover story)”: 8 (10727825) 309.4 (2012): 68. Academic Search Premier. Web. 24 Apr. 2014.