A Noble Cause

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A Noble Cause

The three young punks had been walking down a street in their neighborhood looking for whatever they could get their hands on and generally up to no good, when they stumbled upon an old man lying on the curb. "Hey, check the old dude down on the curb. Let's see what the ol' guy's got!" gibed one of the three ruffians.

"Yeahhh!" agreed another, grinning from ear to ear like a hyena at the sight of fresh meat.

"Hold it!" said Rick, the leader of the pack. "He might be Five-O! Net, go over there and turn him around. Let's see what he looks like."

Ernesto, or Net or Neto, as he was known by his close friends, did as he was told and using his leg as a lever, cautiously turned the man over, and immediately the man started convulsing and coughing violently, taking Net by surprise and causing him to stumble back. The man continued his violent coughing for a while, and then muttered something incoherently. He opened his eyes and looked around dazed and confused, but the glare from the sun was too bright, so he used his hands to shield himself with. Then he started coughing again, but this time the coughing turned into full-blown retching, making the three young punks turn away in disgust. After the man finished, Net, who was closest to the man, gave him a quick, hard kick to the groin. The man yelled out in pain, grabbing his crotch and writhing on the ground -then he began to vomit all over again.

"Damn, Net, what did you do that for?" asked Rick.

"Sucker pissed me off! Now it smells like crap around here!"

"Yeah, well you just made him vomit again, DICKHEAD!! Don't mess with him again, understand?!" Rick said angrily, as he approached the man for a closer look. The man appeared to be genuinely drunk, but police undercover cops were good at disguising themselves and going through elaborate charades in order to make street arrests.

"Come on, Rick, man, let's see what he's got," said the middle of the ruffians, Johnny, itching to get his hands on the man, and eyeing the man's gold diamond ring with special interest.

"Wait! I've got to be sure this dude's not 5-0!"

"Rick, man, he just vomited all his crap out! He ain't no 5-0! Look at him, he's just a drunk ol' dude!"

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