DUFF. Designated Ugly Fat Friend. A new word, just invented. A laugh. A lark. The reason kids are going to open their graves up.
i don’t care if this movie shoots rainbows in the form of body-positive be-your-ugly-self messages out of it’s unwashed caked up chocolate starfish: the word will stick. and that’s where the damage begins.
we are all sure that we are the useless friend. we are never the pretty one, never good enough, just there to drop a few words for everyone to chuckle over. we’re not smart, we’re not artistic, we’re not even particularly talented. we’re just there, taking up space. and now this fear - this quiet niggling doubt that anyone cares about what happens to kids like us - this fear is totally validated. this fear has a word. this fear is an acronym, textable, totally up-and-coming.
we’re going to look at the actress they hired to be a spunky brunette who likes overalls and rock and roll and making bad jokes and we’re going to compare ourselves to it. and we’re going to say: i am fat. i am ugly. i am the useless friend. she’s got collar bones like knives that curl out from her shoulders but just because she’s bad at dressing herself, we’re supposed to believe that she’s unwanted. she’s got beautiful hair and a straight-toothed smile, but it’s her obsession with monster trucks that makes her undesirable.
i am the DUFF. Even when i was hospitalized for being underweight, i was the fat friend. even when i was the only girl in the room, i still managed to be the least attractive. i’m a hardcore feminist and don’t judge anyone else on what they look like. i’ve been so overweight my mother has cried. without makeup i look like something that’s died. i know i shouldn’t judge my character just o...
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... our friends based on their weight and their face type. but we’ll still be crying over the idea of this movie later tonight because we might just be the duff - we might.
so maybe pretty brunette with no meat on her at all - maybe she’s gonna get the guy and go home victorious and self-assured. but she’s taken down so many others to do so. because that’s the way that insecurity works: the “be-yourself” message is drowned out by everything else. the word will stay because it’s already there. we already have hated ourselves for being awful. we have already constantly wondered if we really didn’t fit into our circle of friends.
so thanks for giving us a name we can torture ourselves with. i’m sure your two hour movie is totally worth it. later, when you go home, i hope you wash your hands of the blood of us kids. because trust me, baby. you’re going to be stained with it.
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