In “Don’t Marry Career Women,” Michael Noer claims that marrying educated career women is a recipe for disaster, while in “Career Women Do Not Make Bad Wives,” Stephanie Coontz claims that educated and professional women make better wives. Both authors make excellent arguments, but after reading each article it appears that the answer to whether or not wives should become educated and hold careers depends on the needs of each specific married couple.
In the article “Don’t Marry Career Women,” Michael Noer, executive editor of Forbes magazine, urges men not to marry professional women because marriages to these women are more likely to become unstable. He acknowledges that men often find educated, ambitious women attractive, however the likelihood
…show more content…
Both Coontz and Noer address how marrying educated and professional women can impact the sex lives between husband and wife, but the authors hold differing views about what this means. Coontz cites sociologist Virginia Rutter, who claims that educated couples “have better sex lives.” Intimacy in marriage helps spouses bond and find unity as a couple, therefore marrying educated women can prove beneficial to the stability of a marriage. Noer argues otherwise, holding that educated and professional women will more likely cheat on their husbands. He cites a study from the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy that says that people who finished graduate school will more likely cheat than people who only finished high school. Furthermore, the likelihood for a person to have an affair increases if they have an income of over $30,000. He also points out that women who work outside of the home spend time interacting with other men, so they become more likely to have extra-marital relations. While Noer brings up some good points, his argument about educated and professional women and their sexual relations outside of marriage has its limitations. In most cases, it seems overly controlling and jealous for men to prevent their wives from gaining educations and pursuing careers out of the fear that their wives will cheat. Nevertheless, couples should consider how educations and jobs will impact their sex lives and faithfulness to each other. If a couple already has fidelity issues in their marriage, perhaps it’s best for the wife to put aside professional aspirations until they can work through their problems. If stability already exists in a marriage, however, a wife holding an education and a career could improve intimacy between her and her
These days, marriage contracts fortunately treat both men and women the same, and look at it as more of a partnership rather than a legal contract with economical advantages. (Bernstein, 2011) Today, women have more goals than getting married and having children, most want to go to college and having a successful career. It is normal for a woman to be completely successful all on her own without a husband. These days, a woman can be the bread winner of her family while her husband is a stay at home father. There are also several single working mothers and single working
At what point does work life start interfering with family life to an extent that it becomes unacceptable? Is it when you don’t get to spend as much time with your family as you would like, or is it the point where you barely get to see your family due to long hours at work? Is it even possible to balance work with family life? Anne-Marie Slaughter, the author of “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All”, believes this balance is impossible to achieve in this day and age. In contrast, Richard Dorment, the author of “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All”, believes that there will never be a day when someone will have it all, certain sacrifices will always have to be made. Both of these articles are similar in the respect that they both examine balancing a demanding career with raising children. The two authors’ views on the subject differ greatly, especially regarding how gender roles have a significant impact on our society.
In class there have been many discussions over the relationships and marriages among the books we have read. When someone thinks of marriage, a fairy tale with a happy ending might come to mind, or possibly a safe haven for those looking for something stable. In The Awakening by Kate Chopin, and “The Yellow Wallpaper” by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, marriage takes a turn for the worse. Marriage is no longer the happy memories in a lifetime. It can be the thing that hinders the women in these stories from developing their full potential or experiencing the world and other lifestyles. Through these texts and this time frame, we will analyze the meaning of their marriages, how they function, and the end result of both.
“Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished,” said Johann Wolfgang von Goethe. An American wealth-research corporation, Prince and Associates, once did a research on a sample group of more than thirty women that if they would marry for money. Surprisingly, about approximately seventy-five percent of the group said “yes”. In fact, many women admit that they would rather marry a billionaire that they barely know than a penniless guy they truly love. We often read in novels and see it in those late night soap dramas, in the most romantic setting with exquisite background music, the main character solemnly promises his passionate love to the female actor with ninety-nine roses in his hand; the female character of course feels touched by his actions and blissfully accepts his proposal. Depressingly, those fairy-tales are too beautiful to become true. Take Mr. and Mrs. Bennet from Pride and Prejudice for an example, it is quite obvious that these two irresponsible adults did no marry for pure love. Mr. Bennet was more attracted to Mrs. Bennet’s physical appearance in his youth, and he rushed into courtship without further consideration. As time passes, Mrs. Bennet no longer has her good-looking face. Twenty years later, Mr. Bennet lost interest in her and regret ever marrying her. As you can see, in the twenty-first century, a time full with fierce competition, material gain is the first thing most women concern about when they marry, followed by physical attraction and security to a stable home.
Warren Farrell is a well educated man who focuses his attention on gender. In his essay “Men as Success Objects,” he writes about gender roles in male-female relationships. He begins, “for thousands of years, marriages were about economic security and survival” (Farrell 185). The key word in that statement is were. This implies the fact that marriage has changed in the last century. He relates the fact that post 1950s, marriage was more about what the male and female were getting out of the relationship rather than just the security of being married. Divorce rates grew and added to the tension of which gender held the supremacy and which role the individuals were supposed to accept. “Inequality in the workplace” covered up all of the conflicts involved with the “inequality in the homeplace”(Farrell). Farrell brings to attention all ...
Since most men have mothers to cater to their every need up until the time they move out, they have outrageous expectations of how a wife should act and what duties she should perform. Judy Brady, who is a wife and mother, wrote the essay "I Want a Wife" to explain what men want in a wife. She discusses the different skills a wife needs to possess for a man to consider her a good wife. Brady’s use of repetition, constant sarcasm, and defensive word choice throughout her essay makes it successful by relating to women’s frustrations of being a wife.
More traditional marriages survived longer than today’s modern marriages; however, the traditional marriages that ended years later left many housewives feeling discarded. These wives who were used to staying at home with no careers were left trying to figure out survival while their husbands moved on to younger, beautiful career oriented women. The women they started to become attracted too were women with less stress who could devote more attention to them at the end of the day.
“In particular, not only are rates of IPV expected to be higher in a capitalist economy than a socialist one, but rates of IPV, are also expected to be higher during periods of economic downturn and recession than during periods of relative prosperity” (Hattery and Smith 211). Relationships that undergo financial hardships through economic slumps are likely to create problems because doubts are raised towards the ability of the man to provide for his relationship, which trigger outbursts because men see that as an attack on their manhood. But through recessions and lean employment periods, women see the importance in which there are advantages in having an additional income to supplement their living conditions. “Thus, marriage—or long-term
In a job interview, the employer is almost always looking for knowledge and experience. This desired employee is stereotypically better at time management, finding solutions, and __. Also, knowledge is associated with education. Therefore, someone who did not attend college has a slimmer shot at obtaining a working position than someone who did attend college. Those with immense knowledge are highly respected, and they are most likely to earn more money than those who are considered ignorant. Knowledge brings more opportunities, success, and money. Knowledge brings success in relationships as well. In a marriage, if a husband knows his wife well, and vice versa, their marriage will prosper. Knowing more about someone creates a deeper relationship with that person. He knows her deepest struggle; she knows his deepest fear. Compare this relationship to a flower. A flower is beautiful and strong on the outside, but why? It has roots that are deep and intertwined with the soil and nutrients underneath. Just like a flower is strong and beautiful because it is connected to its roots, the married couple are connected in a deep relationship because of their knowledge of each other. This strong relationship brings power to every aspect of their
Career and work is a high correlation variable in this study. According to the research men who don't believe in steady jobs or are less successful at work are more likely to enter into a cohabitation union because it encourages an egalitarian pattern of support for the nucleus. However, a two point increase on value on money slows men into entering any kind of union from 13% to 11%. Men are less likely to get married or cohabit of they find interest in making money. On the other hand, Women who value money and career are much more likely to enter into a cohabitation union as stated by the decrease in union formation from 13% to 10% derivative of a two point increase in career and money value. These women believe that marriage's gender-specific roles may force them to put their careers in a secondary track to that of their husbands and they are unwilling to do so. This study is significant because it is opposite of what happened in the men's study.
Different levels of education in a marriage will give women a lot of pressures. In Gilman’s story, John controls his wife just by being a doctor. “If a physician of high standing and one’s own husband, assures friends and relatives that there is really nothing the matter with one but temporary nervous depression [...]” (154). Since her husband is a professional doctor, she cannot fight back with John about her illness. She believes that John’s higher education is putting more pressure on her as his wife. This shows that one higher education can be a pressure of others in a family. The levels of education make marriage become an oppressive re...
Inside the article “Why Marriage is Good for You”, Maggie Gallagher makes claims that marriage improves many facets of an individual’s life; including both mental and physical health, longevity, finances, and reduced chances of infidelity (Gallagher). The statements made throughout the article reference many statistics and studies conducted by various organizations and individuals, however, Gallagher falls victim to a number of common logical fallacies. While this weakens Gallagher’s argument in the article, it does not necessarily make it false.
The following five models are used to explain the concept of infidelity, based on the marital relationship: the need fulfillment model, the investment model, the deficit model, the self-expansion model, and the personal growth model. Each model explains a potential reason that one might cheat on his or her spouse. Part of the need fulfillment model that intrigued me was that people are attracted to their spouses based on how well they think they can fulfill the following seven specific needs: sex, intimacy, companionship, intellectual stimulation, emotional involvement, security, and self worth. The key word that stood out in this was the word “think.” These people believed that the partners they chose could fulfill their needs, but they later discovered that this was not the case. Perhaps they were infatuated or “blinded by love” so to speak, but whatever the case may be they still cheated on their partners due to unmet needs. The investment model examined what makes one more or less committed to his or her spouse. This model demonstrates that the level of commitment and attraction to one’s spouse hinges on the level of satisfaction and what the individual has to lose from the marriage ending. I would imagine there are plenty of people who stay in their marriages strictly because of children and financial stability. As the article stated, these things act as a “barrier to keep the
Within these marriages, readers get a sense of how education plays an important role in a successful marriage, as this fulfills both of their dreams of personal identity. Although women in the nineteenth century were viewed to be superior wives and mothers, manage the household, and perform domestic tasks, it was important for women to become educated as “an education was supposed to enable these girls to become successful women in society” (Leigh 117). Women were not meant to be “trained” in some way to become good wives, but needed to be formally educated in order to be a successful wife and