Difficulties with My Boyfriend, Jermaine Essay

Difficulties with My Boyfriend, Jermaine Essay

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For this personal development project, my goal is to become a better partner in my relationship with my boyfriend, Jermaine. Although, we have been together for over four years, I have still have difficulty handling conflict. The motive behind my goals is to become an effective communicator and also enhance my boyfriend’s communication. My goals throughout this process will allow us to establish a much stronger and deeper connection, openly express ideas and opinions and learn to clarify information with fewer misunderstandings.
Particularly, the use of these interpersonal skills such as: perception checking,, using “I” Statements and “We” language, and avoiding absolutes should improve our communication.. Using perception checking aided in accurately understanding my boyfriend’s actions. For instance, there are several occasions where I assumed he was intentionally ignoring my phone calls but he was actually busy and away from his phone. Initially, I would ask Jermaine, “Why have you been ignoring me all day”? Or “What’s wrong with you’re your phone, is it broken”? With perception checking, the first step is to describe the behavior, so I would say to Jermaine, I have been calling you all day and you have not answered. Secondly, you give two interpretations for the behavior, therefore I would say, “Have you been busy today or have you been away from your phone”? Then, I would request for clarification and so I would ask, “What is the problem”? (Adler & Proctor, 2011). After learning the steps of perception checking, I made sure to utilize the skill because it minimized our arguments a great deal and in return, Jermaine responded to my questions respectfully and in a generous manner.
Additionally, I integrated “I” state...

... middle of paper ...

...oiding absolutes helped me clarify his actions truthfully and it also ended the pointless debates about his behavior (Adler & Proctor, 2011).
Using perception checking, using “I” statements and “We” language, and avoiding absolutes have aided my relationship tremendously and our communication is becoming more effective everyday. The use of these skills has lessened our misunderstandings and meaningless arguments, which were the essential goals for my development plan. Achieving these goals has allowed us to grow and it also demonstrated our increased maturity throughout this semester. This experience seemed to be enduring; it is truly an impressive technique for any relationship, especially my relationship with my boyfriend, Jermaine.

Works Cited

Adler, R. B., & Proctor II, R. F. (2011). Looking out/ looking in; interpersonal communication. Boston: Wadsworth.

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