Creative Writing: The Flying Lotus Essay

Creative Writing: The Flying Lotus Essay

Length: 995 words (2.8 double-spaced pages)

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It all started when our overrated adventurer, The Flying Lotus, woke up in a magical cornfield. It was the first time it had happened. Feeling scarcely pleased, The Flying Lotus slapped a gerbil, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). A few unsatisfying minutes later, he realized that his beloved invisible cloak was missing! Immediately he called his redheaded stepchild of a 'friend', Lady Wonder. The Flying Lotus had known Lady Wonder for (plus or minus) half a million years, the majority of which were sassy ones. Lady Wonder was unique. She was attractive though sometimes a little... dimwitted. The Flying Lotus called her anyway, for the situation was urgent.

Lady Wonder picked up to a very happy The Flying Lotus. Lady Wonder calmly assured him that most legless puppies belch before mating, yet venomous koalas usually explosively sneeze *after* mating. She had no idea what that meant; she was only concerned with distracting The Flying Lotus. Why was Lady Wonder trying to distract The Flying Lotus? Because she had snuck out from The Flying Lotus's with the invisible cloak only eleven days prior. It was a curious little invisible cloak... how could she resist?

It didn't take long before The Flying Lotus got back to the subject at hand: his invisible cloak. Lady Wonder shuddered. Relunctantly, Lady Wonder invited him over, assuring him they'd find the invisible cloak. The Flying Lotus grabbed his canoe and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Lady Wonder realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the invisible cloak and she had to do it recklessly. She figured that if The Flying Lotus took the nappy, busted-out hatchback, she had take at least two mi...


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...d collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Eagles running off with his invisible cloak.

But then God came down with His easygoing smile and restored The Flying Lotus's invisible cloak. Feeling angered, God smote the Eagles for their injustice. Then He got in His best-in-its-so-called-'class' sedan and zipped away with the fortitude of half a million legless puppies running from a huge pack of 3-legged wallabies. The Flying Lotus jumped with joy when he saw this. His invisible cloak was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in five minutes his favorite TV show, Jersey Shore, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When man-eating capybaras meet ebola'). The Flying Lotus was giddy. And so, everyone except Lady Wonder and a few contraceptive-toting long-haired sea monkeys lived blissfully happy, forever after.

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