The Couple and Family Map measures closeness and flexibility. There are three different sections on the map: balanced, mid-range, and unbalance. At three different points in my life, my family lands at three different places on the map. At times one and three, my family’s closeness and flexibility scores put me in the middle of the map—the balanced area. At time two, my family was somewhat connected but overly flexible. Over time my family has grown and changed, and as a result of our experiences, our levels of closeness, flexibility, and communication have changed as well.
My Family Type
My family’s level of closeness and flexibility is in the balanced area of the family map, right in the middle. The position on the map indicates that my family has a good balance of connectedness and flexibility. We are well connected and flexible without being too connected or flexible. The map defines closeness as a measure of how interdependent and loyal the family is, as well as how much time is spent together as a family and how close its members feel. Flexibility measures how leadership and roles are shared, ability to change, and how lenient or strict the discipline is.
The map shows that my family is somewhat to very connected, and I would agree with those findings. My family consists or my mother, my sister Hannah, and I: since it is just us girls in our house, we have always been relatively close. When I go home, I spend most of my time catching up with them. My boyfriend knows that his best bet for seeing me when I am home is coming to spend time with all of us together because maintaining my connection with them is a priority. However, both my mom and my sister have a tendency to isolate themselves and stay in bed for ho...
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... and flexibility were the most balanced. When my family was overly flexible and disconnected, we were very unhappy: things were unstable, and we could not talk it out.
As reflected by my experience, it is important for families to be somewhat to very connected and somewhat to very flexible. Balance in these areas along with good communication seems to be correlated with happiness. When families are able to communicate well with each other, adapt to changing circumstances, and feel close and connected, they fall near the center of the map. When my family was closer to the center of the map, that is when we were happiness and the most well-adjusted. When we were further from the center of the map, we were having more problems in general. As the map demonstrates, it is crucial for families to have a good balance of closeness, flexibility, and communication.
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