The Conflict Of A Conflict Essay

The Conflict Of A Conflict Essay

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Having a confrontation or getting into a conflict is something that most of us would avoid at all costs. The concept of using conflict as an opportunity or using it to our advantage isn’t something that normally comes to our minds as we think about conflict or better yet while where actually in a conflict. This is absolutely the contrary, as we get into conflict everyday. If we don’t see conflict as an opportunity to learn more about the other person and more about how we handle conflict in general, then the only option for dealing with them would be to completely withdraw. Imperfections within relationships are handled in two ways. Constructively and destructively, but the way we go about repairing the conflict is just as important as the behavioral management that takes place during the transgression. Whether that be with those who are close to us or those that we interact with day-to-day, conflict is inevitable. The relationship I chose to examine was the relationship I have with my best friend from High School. We have had small and large transgressions across the course of our relationship, some perpetual some solvable, and most have been managed in different ways. Due to this I thought it would be the perfect example of how conflict is managed constructively or destructively and how actions following the transgression are just as important as our behavior during the transgression.

The first way that conflict is managed is destructively. According to Payne and Sabourin (1990), Wolf (2015) and Knapp and Vangelisti (2009) destructive conflict management is manifested specific behaviors that don’t lead towards the progressing trough the conflict. One of those patterns laid out is criticism. My relationships criti...


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...Its extremely important to be aware of what messages were are giving our children about the way they should handle themselves in high stress situations.

To conclude, conflict is managed in two ways, one being constructive while the other destructive. It’s also important to note that even though the way we handle conflict is vital towards its outcome, its just as important to fully understand how to go about gaining forgiveness. Without that understanding it’s impossible to have the culture of continuous improvement that we are all looking for within our relationships. Not only that but the lives we carry out day to day are the lives that our kids grow up seeing and implicitly classifying as ideal reactions to conflict. Conflict is something we need to embrace rather than live in fear of if we wanted to have quality relationships with high satisfaction rates.

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