Weaknesses Can Be Improved Have you ever started writing a paper with no idea where to begin? This is one aspect of writing that I continue to struggle with. For some reason, starting with a blank white screen on a word document staring me in the face is intimidating. Even though I know what I am going to write about, I have a hard time finding that perfect sentence to begin with that catches the reader’s attention, and at the same time leads into my thesis statement. In addition to finding a way to start my paper, I have come to the realization that I generally struggle with the use of the comma, making my thesis clear, and repetition. I have also noticed that some of my strengths include my conclusion, sentence variety, and the ability …show more content…
Once I figure out how to get an important point across, I continually bring up this idea to make sure my readers see that the idea is important. This occurs in the the first draft of essay two, when I repeat four times that Alpha Epsilon Delta (AED) brings in certified guest speakers and provides students with shadow opportunities, which is what separates them from other pre-health discourse communities on campus. I state the concept first in paragraph eight, when Jake says, “AED gives more insight in the pre-health area by bringing in guest speakers, whereas Beta Beta Beta solely gives volunteer opportunities, and AMSA is more specific to medical school.” From the first to second draft I left kept the main idea there because it was quote, which is evidence that my thesis was correct. Then I bring the same concept up again in the next paragraph, “The act of bringing in these professional speakers to AED meetings is what separates AED from the rest of the pre-health related organizations on campus.” I removed that sentence after the second draft, once I realized I had continually brought up the same idea. I exploit that same notion one more time in between the last paragraph and my conclusion, to sum up my paper and restate my thesis, “I have determined that AED stands out from the rest of the pre-health organizations at the University of Miami because of the unique professional …show more content…
Once in in the opening paragraph, “AED is known for their guest speakers and shadow opportunities that they provide for their members year round.” And once in the closing paragraph; AED stands out from the rest of the pre-health organizations at the University of Miami because of the variety of professional speakers brought in by the e-board, the shadow opportunities that are provided for members, and the fact that it looks great on a medical school application. Incorporating these quotes were necessary but I was able to cut back on the repetition while still being able to get the point across. Those quotes also helped me improve on another weakness of mine, clearly stating my thesis. In the first two drafts, I begin with the introduction of my discourse community and how it fits Swales six characteristics that define a discourse community. I decreased the amount of repetition by only having the main idea once in my introduction and once in my
Since Professor Limcolioc already notified us that we would be writing about one of the readings, I would always rank the readings from most interesting to least. Obviously, I found “Westbury Court” most interesting because the repetition of “Sometimes it’s too late to say, ‘I shouldn’t have’” truly spoke out to me. For my introduction, I did not really know what to write. I started to think of a hook, but then I felt like I just wanted to get straight to the point—which was to begin with which reading I will be analyzing. I began to type my introduction and I found myself writing a summary of the essay. Initially, the introduction was quite long because I summarized “Westbury Court” with a lot of unnecessary details. When I had someone else proofread it, they told me that I should cut it down a bit and so I did. After my summary, I stated my thesis, which was why the repetition of “Sometimes it’s too late to say, ‘I shouldn’t have’” is significant. For my first body paragraph, I talked about what the mother must have meant when she said the phrase the first time by using one of the heuristics (Notice and Focus). With that, I included a few parts of my original summary. I used the Method for my second body paragraph, in which I specifically utilized the binary opposition to write about how Danticat was before and after the fire. For my third body paragraph, I made assumptions by looking at the
The very first sentence goes right into the speech with no holding back and it lays out the thesis tha...
The point is just to let the unrestricted thoughts flow, for me most of the time it ends up being a rant that makes me look like a less than nice guy. To prove my point in the third essay for the class titled “Writing for all” the first draft was a total rant. The they say a portion of the essay had lines like “ A student would go to class, learn “... drop the E and add -ing” to make something a verb. Only to later down the line learn, doto some detail, it doesn’t always count as a verb.” making me sound pessimistic. Not something I generally would allow people to read. After a combing through the rant filled pages of that first draft I managed to salvage I created this as the better opening “A scholar may use writing as a way for us to preserve what we learned, for future generations to build off of. A book author will use writing to pull people into the book’s world of mythos and legend.” The First draft had essayed gold mired in the rant somewhere and just took rereading and picking out those lumps of gold. Which then have the opportunity to be part of the main essay after smelting or filtering it
But aside from being lengthy, I also started to expound upon very specific quotes and examples in the thesis itself. For example, instead of identifying the unified theme of the imagery, I stated very distinct examples of such imagery. Thus, it appears as if the structure of my essay is reversed: too many details in the thesis and not enough in the body paragraphs!
J. A. Reinking & R. von der Osten, R. (2007). Strategies for successful writing: A rhetoric, research guide, reader, and handbook (8th ed.). Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson Prentiss Hall. ISBN: 0-13-189195-2.
In all my years of going to school I have had trouble writing introductions and conclusions for my papers. All of my teachers would tell me that you would want your introduction to flow and clearly start what you are going to talk about. When ever I would write an introduction it would never flow. It is always fairly choppy and I could not figure out how to smoothen it out. Now that I am in college people have told me to not summarize my paper in my introduction. This requires even more creativity and thought to create an introduction, which I can never seem to think of. This also applies to my conclusions as well on how they must be so complicated. When writing an introduction and or conclusion there are suppose to be all different techniques to help write them but I can never apply any of them to what I am writing so they rarely help me. Also depending on the class I am writing for determines how difficult it is for me to write an introduction and conclusion. For example, English papers and philosophy papers usually give me a bit more trouble then history papers. I have learned from being in college that English and philosophy papers need to be much more elaborate and deep. When writing a history paper you must be direct and right to the point and that is what I seem to do best. It shows because my history paper grades are a bit higher then my philosophy and English papers.
Frahm holds a similar point of view encouraging clear, straightforward writing not one with a “Confusing introduction. Lack of content. Bad transitions. (and) Excessive grammatical errors.” (Frahm 271).
In my first draft for “Death Constant Beyond love”, my points were vague and seemed to be repeated in different parts of the paper which seemed that I had multiple statements. However, I did a deep analysis through my paper and located the key points of my ideas to create an outline that will drive the reader to only one conclusion, my thesis statement. In this essay I found my weakness but with hard work and multiple writing assignments I improved in a way that now I can focus in only one idea. For instance my thesis statement in this essay was contrasting as I wrote:
Everybody has weaknesses, and no one can deny that. Some people are jealous, some have bad habits they need to break, and some are over-nice (but in the bad way). Mine happens to be the third one in that list. In multiple situations, I have been too nice to the point where it hurts me and makes me miserable. Where this weakness is the worst is definitely in relationships: both romantic and friendships. My personal weakness of being too nice isolates me from being happy for myself in the same way as Hester’s sin isolated her from the Puritan community in The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne.
Harris, Robert A. Writing with Clarity and Style: A Guide to Rhetorical Devices for Contemporary Writers. Los Angeles, CA: Pyrczak Pub., 2003. Print.
...ragraphs that support the argument. The easiest part of this component was actually inserting it in my essay after I understood the purpose for it, because at the beginning I was confused on the whole thesis concept. The thesis was the most challenging because I kept asking myself "Can I really argue this for five to six pages?" and also "Is this even considered a thesis statement?" I noticed that I can speak and write more effectively when I'm thinking critically and intellectually. My sentence structure has always been strong and I feel it has grown because of the practice we have had in class with finding thesis statements in our readings. My overall issue with this component of the writing process is using a justifiable argument and remembering to support my argument with claims and trying not to put unnecessary points in my paper while maintaining my ethos.
Over the past semester, I have found the most challenging part of this course to simply be the transition from high school composition classes to college. Because writing expectations are so different in college than in high school, even with AP and Dual Enrollment “college level” classes, I first found myself being overwhelmed with the pressure to write the perfect first draft. The pressure came from knowing how much a final draft of a paper contributed to my grade. This left me sitting in front of my computer for hours at a time with thoughts of what I wanted to say racing through my head, but unable to deliver these thoughts into organized, structured sentences. I learned, through writing my persuasive essay, that instead of trying to write the paper start to finish and already in its perfect form, it is easier for me to look at the paper through its different components and focus on them individually, then work to best organize my ideas fluently.
During the course of this semester; the variety of writing styles and essays assigned to me in my communication skills class encouraged the development of my writing skills, as well as provided me with more self-assurance in my abilities. My writing, research, and presentation abilities enhanced through practice, determination, and the understanding I gained during this course. With every single writing assignment, I learned new innovative approaches and skills, which enhanced my abilities to improve my thoughts logically, enabling me to write more clearly, and to organize my papers more effectively. At the beginning of this semester; despite the fact that I already knew the terminology MAP: message, audience, purpose; I never really understood the significance of MAP. For this reason, my writing lacked clarity, organization, and my writings appeared less focused on the topics. As a result my research papers and essays did not flow as smoothly from one passage to the next. Furthermore, I was unaccustomed with the precise procedures used when writing an essay. For instance, my previous classes before college, although requiring a reference page, did not require me to include proper citations in my writings. After evaluating the quality of my writing toward the end of the semester, I recognized vast improvements in several areas of my writing. By concentrating on the beginning stages of my writings, I could distinguish ahead of time my audience and my message. As a result, my essays are clear, and I remain on topic. In addition to that using transition phrases efficiently also helps my writing to flow smoothly. The proper use of transitions makes my writings easy to follow from one topic to the next. I also learned that pre-writing...
Even the best writers have their own flaws. Shakespire for example would make up his own words including ; bedazzled and fashionable. Those words come from his plays King of the Shrew and Troilus and Cressida. I like to think of myself as a skilled writer but I’d like to improve in writing proper conclusions and repetition of certain words.
A major flaw that I discovered in this class in my writing was my inability to write a proper and creative thesis statement. To me thesis statements are the most difficult things to write in English. I always seem to write the thesis statement to sh...