I was sixteen years old when I got pregnant. As soon as I saw the plus sign on the pregnancy test, I knew I wasn’t going to be able to experience being a real teenager. The thought of giving up my life and devoting myself to an infant terrified me. I was still in high school and couldn’t support myself, how could I possibly support the growing child inside of me? This was one among many of the questions that I did not have the answers to. I would have to be able to finish school, go to college, and create a stable life for me and my baby. I had to give up numerous friendships and cut back on money I would typically spend to enjoy myself. My dreams of traveling the world had come crashing down. Telling my family that I was pregnant was one of the scariest moments of my life. Even worse was being rushed into the hospital and being handed a life that I’ve created. After reading through the collections of poetry, I was struck by term “Daystar”, which means a brand new day would start, another day would end. He became my light in the darkness. The dichotomy of loving and fearing my sweet baby sums up my experience as a teen mother suffering post-partum depr...
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...t’s a little upsetting to see my child grow up so quickly; however I adore seeing him overcome the obstacles of being young. Now, he can run and communicate with me; although, I miss him being an infant and needing me to rock him to sleep.
As I read through the two poems, I realized that motherhood is one big contradiction. It is the hardest and most rewarding experience I could imagine. Parenting a one year old has been the most exciting, yet depressing chapter of my life. Some days seem to drag on forever, but I know that it is important to stop and realize that one day my son is going to be fully grown and be on his own in this world of conflict. I need to enjoy each moment I have with him while I can. The most important lesson I have learned during the past few months is that time doesn’t stop. Cherish the moments you have rather than mourning. He is my daystar.
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