Analysis of Advice Provided in Logan Hill's My Boyfriend’s Porn Makes Me Feel Inadequate”

Analysis of Advice Provided in Logan Hill's My Boyfriend’s Porn Makes Me Feel Inadequate”

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Introduction
Pornography has been a widely debated topic for years because of the unrealistic pressure and expectations that it puts on its viewers. An advice column written by Logan Hill, titled “My boyfriend’s porn makes me feel inadequate”, (2013) will be the focus of this critique. The advice given in this column is centered around the idea that porn should not make you jealous or any less self-confident because you are real and your partner would much rather be with you. The purpose of this paper is to support as well as refute the advice provided by Hill (2013) using course material and empirical research.

Textbook Support – Concept 1
The first concept that will be used to support the advice from the column will be romantic jealousy. “Romantic jealousy is a complex of thoughts, emotions, and actions that follows loss or threat to self-esteem and/or the existence or quality of the romantic relationship” (White, Martin, & Bartolic, 2013, p.303-304). The loss or threat is created by the perception of a real or potentially romantic attraction between one’s partner and a (perhaps imaginary) rival. This form of jealousy relates to the advice column since the person who received the advice is jealous of her boyfriend’s porn because it makes her feel self-conscious and less desirable. The concept of romantic jealousy coincides with the advice given because it explains how a rival generates the feeling of jealousy, this rival does not have to be a person, and it could be something as simple and as pornography.
This form of jealousy helps support the relationship advice because the advice from the columnist that was given to the woman explains how she should not compare herself to anyone else and that she is a real person who is able...


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.... In addition to this, relationships are complicated and sometimes very fragile. In order to maintain a healthy relationship it is important to communicate and express to your partner any problems that you are having and come to an agreed upon solution. Additional advice that could be given to the woman seeking advice could be to sit down with her boyfriend and actually have a mutual discussion about his use of pornography and explain to him that it is bothering her and she is having feelings of inadequacy. For example, she may be concerned that he would rather watch porn than be with her. If she clearly expressed how she was feeling, the hope would be that her boyfriend would most likely validate her feelings, comfort her and let her know that he would rather be with her. He might even agree to decrease or stop using pornography altogether through their discussion.

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