When most couples get married, they dream of love, happiness, and forever. My first marriage was just this dream for me. However, there was fighting, distrust, and a mounting hatred that only continued to grow each day. Due to the constant verbal, emotional, and physical abuse I chose to leave my husband. Life as a single mother was difficult but, I wanted to be alone to focus on myself and my children. I started dating off and on after six months of separation and I later met a man who treated me the way I deserved. This man made me feel loved, respected, and safe. After being together for a while I decided it was time to ask for a divorce from my estranged husband. It seemed I had met the man meant for me so I needed to move on from the demons of my first marriage with an understanding that not all men were the same and let myself be open to the possibility of love again.
The first time I married I was 19 years old and had an eight month old son. The decision to do so was due to the fact that we had a child together and we thought we needed to be married to be a real family. I quickly learned this was a mistake because we made the decision for the wrong reason. We should have gotten married because we were happy and truly loved each other. The opposite of this was true. Arguing was a constant and it would be triggered over anything you could think of such as, who did the dishes last or whose turn it was to take the dog out. At times the fighting would become physical and extremely volatile. The fighting actually began sometime before we married and continued throughout our entire relationship. The decision to separate wasn 't an easy one even though we were fighting so often. Separatio...
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...ve and I fall in love with him more every day. If I had continued to dwell in the past, I may have never gotten remarried or known true love. I 'm not sure where I would have ended up or if I would be happy but, I 'm grateful I have no reason to find out. I 'm also grateful that the man who I call my favorite came into my life, changed my point of view, and saved me from myself. He was able to pick me up, put the pieces back together, and rescue my heart. I now know that deciding to leave my first husband wasn 't the worst incident that would happen to me nor did I have to continue suffering. My husband shows me this every day by loving me through all my ups and downs. He still makes me laugh, respects me, and keeps me safe. The best decision I ever made was divorcing my first husband so I could go on with my life and marry the man I loved with all my heart.
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