The “terrible two’s” are nothing compared to the Double-Digit Dischord of a child’s early adolescence. Oh sure, we hear all about how tough it can be to raise a teenager, but I think parents do not mention those “tween” years because they are so traumatized by the conflict , it is just too soon to discuss.
Yes, I am making light of the tendency to attach ideas of conflict with older teens, but research is showing that the traditional teenage years are not when you will have most of your conflict with them (Parent). While it is true that there are various stages in the growth of a child when conflict is likely to occur, it seems unfair not to prepare parents for those years in early adolescence, when you have an opportunity to really set the tone and boundaries.
The research is in: levels of conflict are highest during early the adolescence ages of 10-12 (Parent). I have raised one son. I now have a 9 year old son and an 11 year old daughter to guide into adulthood and responsible independence. This stage we are entering is already showing itself to be difficult at times and it is comforting to know that the conflicts I have already experienced are not necessarily due to previous “mistakes” on my part or exclusively because of a particular temperament that my daughter has always exhibited. The greatest challenge I have with my daughter is instilling a sense of empathy for others. While both my sons seem to have been born equipped with an inherent sense of awareness for others and concern for others, my daughter was not. As it turns out, it might be that my boys were the ones who are exceptions, not my daughter. An organization based in Toronto, Canada actually works with schools to help children understand how to empath...
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...icts knowing that they are not only normal, they are also an opportunity to teach my children how to practice conflict-resolution. I will take the challenge and turn it into an opportunity.
Works Cited
Allison, Barbara N., and Jerelyn B. Schultz. "PARENT-ADOLESCENT CONFLICT INEARLY ADOLESCENCE."Adolescence 39.153 (2004): 101. MasterFILE Premier. EBSCO. Web. 16 Apr. 2011.
Horton-Parker, Radha J. "Teaching children to care: Engendering prosocial behavior through humanistic parenting." Journal of Humanistic Education & Development 37.2 (1998): 66. MasterFILE Premier. EBSCO. Web. 1 May 2011.
TREACY, Sean. "Empathy Can Be the Difference between Bully, Nice Kid." PostStar.com - Glens Falls, Saratoga, Lake George NY Area News. Lee Enterprises, 03 Apr. 2011. Web. 16 Apr. 2011. http://poststar.com/news/local/article_557cbd44-5e37-11e0-8e3f-001cc4c03286.html.
Steinberg, Laurence & Morris, Amanda Sheffield. “Adolescent Development.” Annual Review of Psychology, (Annual 2001): 83-110. [E Journal]
Low-income adolescents, in later years, will experience conflict between their economically stressed parents, as well as lower self-esteem than other teenaged children.
Empathy is imperative to teach kids from a young age in order to help them recognize mental states, such as thoughts and emotions, in themselves and others. Vital lessons, such as walking in another’s shoes or looking at a situation in their perspective, apprehends the significance of the feelings of another. Our point of view must continuously be altered, recognizing the emotions and background of the individual. We must not focus all of our attention on our self-interest. In the excerpt, Empathy, written by Stephen Dunn, we analyze the process of determining the sentiment of someone.
After reading the book, “Seasons of Life” by Jeffrey Marx, I learned a lot about a man named Joe Ehrmann. Ehrmann addresses many coaches, captains, and influential high school athletes. He is on a mission to change the world and believes it can be done by sports and social change. On page 49 of the book a character Biff asks what empathy is. Napoleon Sykes replies with, “Feeling what the other person feels.” This was a great response but Biff added, “Not feeling for someone, but with someone. If you can put yourself in another man’s shoes, that’s a great gift to have for a lifetime.” I believe implementing empathy into children and athletes life is extremely important to start doing at a young age. Yes, it is important to be strong, hard working and successful as an athlete but you will not be an athlete
The most successful way to instill righteous and moral behavior and thoughts is by demonstrating our respectable interactions and honest problem solving approaches during difficult times of our lives. “As adults we should dare to be adults that we want our children to be”. They learn by watching and are quick to mimic our behavior with their peers outside of home. The author writes that “we should strive to raise children who: engage with the world from a place of worthiness, embrace their vulnerabilities and imperfections, feel a deep sense of love and compassion for themselves and others, value hard work, perseverance, and respect, and also move through our rapidly changing world with courage and a resilient spirit” (214, 218-219). All of these elements will help to transform the way we live, love, and
underlying empathy” authors Jean Decety, Greg J. Norman, Gary G. Berntson, John T. Cacioppo explore this phenomenon.
Dovidio J.F. (1991) The empathy-altruism hypothesis: paradigm and promises. Psychological Inquiry, 2(2), 126 – 128
Baumrind, D. (2005). Patterns of parental authority and adolescent autonomy. New directions for Child and adolescent development, 108, 61-69
Click, P. M., & Parker, J. (2002). Caring for School-Age Children (Third Edition). United States of America: Delmar.
Children’s development in all aspects are influenced by genetic composition (Nature) and the environment in which they grow (Nurture). They are influenced by all adults in which they come into significant contact. Smiling at someone unfamiliar or speaking to a stranger is less likely to have a lasting impact on the child or their development. However, parents and immediate family have the most impact on a child’s development. A family is defined as at least one adult and one child who live together and in which the adult is control of the child’s life and behavior as well as demonstrates responsible care for the child (McDevitt & Ormand, 2013). Parents are the primary educators and caregivers,
Sarrazin, J., & Cyr, F. (2007). Parental conflicts and their damaging effects on children. Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, 47(1), 77-93.
It discusses how children are born with that needs to connect with individuals around them. Teachers and providers create positive relationship with children from birth through the early years. The foundation for that healthy social and emotional development because it affects her children see the world, express themselves, manages their emotions, in establishing a positive relationship with others. There were several areas of development that included social interactions that focus on the relationship that we share and include relationship with adults and peers. Emotional awareness recognized and understands your feelings and actions of other people, and self-regulation where you have that ability to express your thoughts, feelings, and behavior in a socially appropriate way. There were many tips that were listed when working with infants from talking and reading, having that warm, responsive, and consistent care, maintaining predictable routines, and getting to know each child while following their lead. The importance of supporting children and developing social skills is critical for learning, happiness, and long-term. This development begins during infancy and can be supported through simple social games, emotional role model, and imitating an infant's facial expression and sounds. The importance of social-emotional development and toddlers makes an impact in a child life when these skills are developed starting in infancy. Encouraging positive behaviors and using positive discipline practices that helped to develop the ability to make good choices as well as recognizing the confidence that is built when these behaviors are repeated. This is a process for young children to learn these behaviors always remembering that a patient response will help especially when the behaviors are
Transition and change are some of the most difficult obstacles for people to overcome. It is no surprise that adolescence, defined as the transition from childhood to adulthood, is full of obstacles (Feldman, 2012). During this time period, adolescents are neither adults nor children; they do not appear to belong in any stable group. However uncomfortable this may seem, it is also a fitting definition. For during the adolescent stage, adolescents face puberty, sexual curiosity, self-esteem issues, and doubts about their future (Feldman, 2012). Psychoanalyst Erik Erikson aptly argued that adolescents pass through the identity-versus-identity-confusion stage in which teenagers search for defining and unique characteristics about themselves (Feldman, 2012). When a teenager struggles with this stage, a crisis emerges in which they are unable to find an appropriate role in life, often acting out or pursuing dangerous behaviors (Feldman, 2012).
While most parents realize there are normal struggles between parents and teens as their sons and daughters struggle for independence and identity, they are often shocked by the length and intensity of the conflict. They are stunned by apparent rejection of some of their most sacred values and confused by their teenagers "acting up" and "acting out." In attempting to become psychologically independent of their parents, teens often attempt to move completely away from any control or influence by their parents.
Indeed, adolescent may be defined as the period within the life span when most of a person’s biological, cognitive, psychological and social characteristics are changing from what is typically considered child-like to what is considered adult-like (Learner and Spainer, 1980). This period is a dramatic challenge for any adolescent, which requires adjustment to change one’s own self, in the family, and in the peer group. Contemporary society presents adolescents with institutional changes as well. Among young adolescents, school setting is changed; involving a transition from elementary school to either junior high school or middle school; and late adolescence is accompanied by transition from high school to the worlds of work, University or childrearing. An adolescent experiences it all ranging from excitement and of anxiety, happiness and troubles, discovery and bewilderment, and breaks with the past and yet links with the future (Eya,