Moving toward Equality in Therapy

Advocate Stance of Curiosity
As the therapist, it is our job to be curious and investigators because otherwise clients will not reveal enough. “Practitioners may find it helpful to ask questions informed by an awareness…” (Knudson-Martin & Mahoney, 2009, p. 59). By asking informed questions about how a client’s present “patterns of behavior” have been maintained, therapists can help them define what kind of relationships they want. Asking these educated questions, issues can become externalized and shown as an illustration of larger problems outside them and their control.
This curiosity is brought about through vulnerability and self-honesty by part of the client. (Knudson-Martin, 2013) When this vulnerability is present, the therapist can experience the client in a way where it is safe for the client to admit mistakes and still be accepted. Asking a client to talk more on a topic they brought up, or to sit with a feeling and describe it in detail would be something a curious therapist would do. Also, asking open-ended questions allows the clients to tell narratives rather than answer with simple answers. Additional questions may ask the clients to think about something in a different way, likely from their partner’s perspective. I recently began working with a client and his father for family therapy. During session, I noticed the father becoming hostile with his son and I asked him where that hostility was coming from and what he was feeling underneath. At first the father hesitated, but then admitted he “just loves [his son] so much and [he] wants [his son] to be happy.” The client admitted he had never heard that from his father before; curiosity was therapeutic.
Expand Critical Consciousness
The concept of cr...

... middle of paper ...

...ng gender and power in couple therapy: A socio emotional approach. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 1-16. doi:10.1111/jmft.12068
Knudson-Martin, C. (2013). Why power matters: Creating a foundation of mutual support in couple relationships. Family Process, 52(1), 5-18. doi:10.1111/famp.12011
Knudson-Martin, C., & Mahoney, A. R. (2009). Couples, gender, and power: Creating change in intimate relationships. New York: Springer.
Lev, A. I. (2010). How Queer! - The development of gender identity and sexual orientation in LGBTQ headed families. Family Process, 49, 3, 268-290.
Malpas, J. (2011). Between pink and blue: A multi-dimensional family approach to gender nonconforming children and their families. Family Process, 50(4), 453-470.
Tatum, B. (2003). Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?: Revised Edition. New York: Basic Books.