"Can I spend the night with you tonight" the young boy asks the other boy? The response, "No, my dad has me this weekend, maybe next week." We live in a world where over half of the marriages end in divorce. This is truly a confounding issue that faces us today. The moral and ethical ramifications brought about by such a change in family organization will only begin to show in the years to come. Some of these issues are addressed in both Laurie Abraham's "Divorced Father," and Barbara Whitehead's "Women and the Future of Fatherhood."
Where did this all begin? Well, of course all the demoralizing things that can be seen on television have not helped to build strong values in our society. We can no longer expect to watch a game of football without seeing a woman's breast. Our society is truly crumbling before our eyes. The younger generations now view sex in a more liberal way than ever before. They feel that they can have sex and not face the consequences later. These teens then face a harsh reality of having to raise a child having no experience doing so. The teen parent cannot rely on his or her partner because he or she does not know anything as well, and the partner feels trapped in a marriage they did not want, but cannot leave. The couple in-turn turns to their parents for guidance. Having a child is hard enough when it is brought in loving family who is prepared for him or her, but when it is burden for the mother and father, then problems are sure to arise. The young couple has a possibility of surviving these hard times, but the reality is that they will most likely not be able to deal with it. They will either tear away at each other, or grow bored with the lust that has faded with time. Divorce is band-aid society has for them, a solution that leaves the children with a missing link.
The product of this marriage is a child raised by parents who knew nothing about rearing a child, and who now knows nothing about a proper and loving family because he or she did not grow up in one. One can just imagine this situation occurring.
In David Blankenhorn’s book written in 1995, he brings to light what he calls “America’s fundamental problem”: our culture of fatherlessness. Our modern day view of fathers is that they are unnecessary both in society and in the upbringing of a child. Blankenhorn argues the contrary: the only way to solve the multitude of social problems present in America is to address the common denominator, the decline of fathers and the shrinking importance of fatherhood. Blankenhorn’s book is split into three parts: Part I: Fatherlessness, Part II: The Cultural Script and Part III: Fatherhood. In Fatherlessness, he provides the history of fatherhood and includes statistics that help to illustrate the transition of the father from head of the household to being “almost entirely a Sunday institution” (pg. 15).
In the United States today more than one-half of all marriages end in divorce. The purpose of this paper is to examine the reason why women have typically received custody of the children far more often than the fathers. In order to better understand child custody one must first examine how fathers have often times been left out of the picture, and conversely why mothers have had such hard times raising children on their own. This paper will first examine the perspective of a father who has lost custody of his children.
The overabundance of debauched dad’s on Television undermines a cultural ideal of responsible fatherhood at a time when that ideal is most needed. At a time when the culture around us is morally crumbling for lack of responsible men leading their families. A time when the divorce rate is 20 X higher than it was 50 years ago. We are in a time when fatherhood is under assault and the consequences of dads disappearing from America’s Family landscape is detrimental to the well-being of fatherless children. The contributors to fatherlessness are only growing, as are the consequences but there is still hope for father-fullness in America today.
For example, the number of working mothers outside the home has increased since 1970’s, but the mother working is not a new phenomenon. “Mothers sold things from the home such as dairy products and woven goods during colonial times, took in boarders around the turn of the twentieth century, and held industrial jobs during WWII” (Benokraitis 16). Social scientists state that familial issues such as desertion, out-of-wedlock birth, and child abuse have sadly always existed. Similarly, children growing up in single parent households are not a novel occurrence. Even with the rate of single parents doubling in the past three decades, it tripled between the years 1900 and 1950. Divorce is also not a recent trend. The micro and macro level manifestations that tend to split the family structure apart have always existed; nonetheless, they were just not as prevalent or popularized by the media. Families are changing, but despite the obstacles, they are resilient. Families manage to cope with everyday stresses and protect their most vulnerable members- the young, old, ill, or disabled. The American family is synonymous with change, but is resilient regardless of gender roles, divorce rates, and alternatives to
Over recent years, the view of family has shifted drastically. The pendulum has swung from a time when the mark of adulthood was having a spouse and family, to what is now a dreaded life-changer, bound to a spouse or to children. The mostly harmful choice of divorce is now commonplace among parents today; it is accepted with little acknowledgment of the detrimental effects that it has on both the parents and their children. In Barbara Dafoe Whitehead’s essay, “Where Have All the Parents Gone?” she explains that “More than drugs, it was divorce that lay at the heart of middle-class parental failure. It wasn’t the crackhouse but the courthouse that was the scene of their collapse” (283). She also writes about how parents take part in gruesome custody battles, kidnap their own children and use them as weapons against each other. The other option they see themselves as having, is simply walking away from their responsibilities. The sorrowful impact of divorce on the family is observed in the outcome of emotional disorders, strenuous untrusting relationships and premature responsibility loads.
The family unit has been the cornerstone of civilization since the beginning of time. It is the one, ubiquitous common bond that brings human beings together in hopes of perpetuating their lineage. We do not simply mate for reproductions sake. On the contrary, we look to pass on to our children certain cultural beliefs and values that define our very existence. Moreover, just as Satan endeavors to separate the unity Christians have with their Heavenly Father so does divorce threaten the sanctity of marriage. According to the American Psychological Association, (2016) “about 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce”. The dissolution of marriage is not a victimless incident. Its consequence has a far-reaching effect on society as a whole, but even more devastating are the effects on any children that are involved.
In America today, one of our main life goals is to marry the person we fall in love with, live happily ever after, and skip gleefully away to live the American dream. In most cases, after marriage then comes children which starts a family. This has been a part of human nature since the beginning. Marriage and family are the backbone of our culture. Families need each other for support, dependence, learning, love, encouragement, and ultimately survival. Parents are the ones that supply these needs, meanwhile supplying their own needs by depending on each other for love and support. Only the two of them can give this support because of what they are to each other, husband and wife. When two people get married, they are obviously in love and feel that they want to spend the rest of their lives with each other. They make the ultimate commitment to love one another and one another only, forsaking all others til death do they part.
Livingston, Gretchen. The Rise of Single Fathers. 2 July 2013. Web. 11 March 2014 .
Since the dawn of civilised society, children have suffered from losing one or both of their parents. “Half of all American children will witness the breakup of a parent’s marriage” (Bilotta, 1). Children being brought out in single house household are more likely to become depressed and have problems with their peers. In addition “Family Timeline” by ProQuest, in 1920 points out that “The divorce rate is approximately eight per 1,000 marriages” and today that rate has skyrocketed to 50% (Proquest,1). Proquest clearly rationalizes why the divorce rate has risen. “As more women become educated and join the workforce divorce becomes economically possible for them” (Proquest, 2). Marriages have often been a necessity for
The changing of American families has left many families broken and struggling. Pauline Irit Erera, an associate professor at the University of Washington School of Social Work, wrote the article “What is a Family?”. Erera has written extensively about family diversity, focusing on step-families, foster families, lesbian families, and noncustodial fathers. Rebecca M. Blank, a professor of economics at Northwestern University, where she has directed the Joint Center for Poverty Research, wrote the article “Absent Fathers: Why Don't We Ever Talk About the Unmarried Men?”. She served on the Council of Economic Advisors during the Clinton administration. Andrew J. Cherlin, a professor of sociology at Johns Hopkins University wrote the article “The Origins of the Ambivalent Acceptance of Divorce”. She is also the author of several other books on the changing profiles of American family life. These three texts each talk about the relationship between the parent and the child of a single-parent household. They each discuss divorce, money/income they receive, and the worries that come with raising a child in a single-parent household.
Divorce is a process that many people in America go through. The divorce rate continues to escalate over the years. Divorce is a serious problem, it is a gradual process that ultimately results in families breaking up. There are various factors in which a marriage can fail and end up in divorce. Some skip the step of trying to reconcile things and make it work. In some cases it is easy for a divorce to take place. For instance, in cases where both parties are in agreement and have no children it is easier to handle a divorce. But in the cases where children are present, what happens to the kids? Both parents are at each others throats or one is devastated from the rejection, what role does the child play? It is a hard thing to cope with as an adult imagine as a little one or even a teenager, it affects them in more ways than anyone can imagine. It can affect them both physically and emotionally. The effects of divorce are immense, it permanently weakens the bond or relationship between a child and his parents. Can lead to them reaching out or looking to others for attention, causing poor attitudes, low self esteem, dropping grades, loss of virginity, use of drugs and or weapons, or in some cases mutilation of the body. There are various effects that children have to deal with that maybe extremely hard to cope with. One parent may say one thing yet the other disagrees and makes it impossible for the child to have a stable relationship with both of them. Children need both biological parents at their side to be guardians and counselors in their lives, to be examples of what they need to do to become outstanding citizens in our community.
Girgis, George, & Anderson (2011) define marriage as the union of a man and a woman who make a permanent and exclusive commitment to each other of the type that is naturally (inherently) fulfilled by bearing and rearing children together. These marriages are intended to last eternity and are partially accomplished by raising children together, yet four of every ten marriages lead to divorce and of these divorces, 35% involve children (Ambert, 2009). Children tend to blame themselves for the divorce and are usually caught in the crossfire. These divorces lead to both stress and depression for children and without a strong sense of family, children will have a huge disadvantage over children with a stable healthy family (Arreola, Hartounian, Kurges, Maultasch, & Retana, 2013). Without the ability to cope with the stress of a divorce, children can be effected in multiple ways including a change in mentality, unacceptable behavioural traits and both short and long term emotional factors that will ultimately lead to a critical issue in child development.
There was a time when women typically maintained the home and raised children while the husbands were the sole bread-winners for the family finances. However, times have changed and so have women’s rights and expectations for divorce, education, an...
The Family structure has changed significantly in the last fifty years. With higher percentages of marriage ending in divorce, and higher rates of childbearing out of wedlock, single parent families are increasing rapidly. “Seventy percent of all the children will spend all or part of their lives in a single-parent household.” (Dowd) Studies have shown that the children of these families are affected dramatically, both negatively and positively. Women head the majority of single- parent families and as a result, children experience many social problems from growing up without a father. Some of these problems include lack of financial support, and various emotional problems by not having a father around, which may contribute to problems later in life. At the same time, children of single-parent homes become more independent because they learn to take care of themselves, and rely on others to do things for them.
A family traditionally is related by blood. Through marriage, a male and female unite their lives and create new lives by giving birth to children. Procreation allows separate bloods of two completely independent people to intermix giving birth to a new child, which creates new blood and advocates the idea of family defined by Random House Western Dictionary. Although the traditional value and meaning of family still exist in the 21st century, family has begun to change and allowed more variation into what defines a family. (connection between the before and after sentence is a bit choppy) Skepticism makes society unaware of divorce(not clear). People have been ashamed of divorces and shunned those that chose divorce as an alternative method to fix their marriage. Regardless, this shows that the marriage between a man and woman is not always successful. An unsuccessful marriage correlates to an unhappy family. Thus, high di...